self-hypnotized 2025 🌀🌀 agius

@agius.bsky.social

73 Followers 204 Following

horror movies, hardstyle music, shitposting, infosec

Canadian producer REZZ DJs in front of her giant PORTAL visualizer screen, which currently shows a tunnel made of eyeballs leading off to infinity
A screenshot of Kane, leader of the Brotherhood of Nod, congratulating the player on their promotion in the game Command & Conquer
A parachuter descends, but their chute is on fire and mostly burned away. Caption: "How's life?" Me: "HA HA HA!!!! WHEEEEEEE!!!!!!"
Comet Tsuchinshan-ATLAS, also known as C/2023 A3, with city lights in the background and a silhouette of someone taking a picture with a very bright phone
A chocolate Easter bunny sits next to two veiny, grey eggs. One of them is split open at the top. A facehugger from Alien is mounted on the rabbit's head
Tweet from Michael DeForge: horror is a genre that forces us confront unsettling and upsetting questions about ourselves and the world we live in - for instance, "what if you saw a weird face" or "what if there was a guy standing there"
Artwork of the characters from Chrono Trigger: Lucca, Robo, Ayla, Chrono, Marle and Frog doing a pose
A couch with a sign on it saying "Do Not Sit - Thank Mew!" A small tabby kitten sits on the couch arm, looking up away from the sign
A tiny fuzzy kitten, looking over his shoulder at the next thing he wants to pounce
John Talbain, the werewolf from the Darkstalkers fighting game. He has big claws for hands & digitigrade feet, a long snout with all the teeth, pointy ears, is VERY fluffy, and has a huge fuzzy tail.
A packet of silica gel, labeled in big red letters: "Do not eat"
John Leguizamo as the gross demonic clown Violator from the 1997 movie version of Spawn
A Michael Meyers statue in front of someone's house with a Valentine's Day sign that says "Someone Ad-Myers You" . A little pun for John Carpenter fans
Two happy puzzle pieces that fit together sit on a couch. A third puzzle piece, insanely complicated, that looks very fragile and would never fit with anything, walks in the door. A couch-piece says (and has been recaptioned) "Damn nobody want you f r"
Movie poster for 1996 action movie "Executive Decision"
A wikiwhow-style instruction comic. Captioned "how to handle stressful situations," it shows a woman sitting, leaning over, then getting under covers in a bed to sleep. This is why opossums resonate so much these days
Kent Brockman from the Simpsons doing the "I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords" bit
A search for the 🔒lock emoji turning up several posts in a row from folks who like to have various parts of their body bound and locked
A cat, sitting contentedly in a laundry basket
A photo of FuncoLand, an ancient video game retailer, with two 90's-era cars parked outside
Two-panel comic: the first is a bag labelled "Depression kit" with stones like Lapis Lazuli and Rose Quartz, and listing how they promote peace, improve self-worth, and relieve depression. The second panel is a cartoon opossum with an empty bag and a bunch of rocks taped to it, crying voluminously. It is captioned "HNNNG TURN ON NOW PLZ"
A trail in the middle of the woods, tall redwoods on either side, the sun blazing through the trees and dappling the ground with bright glints
A snowy egret bird, wading in water, hunched into a roughly orb shape. It was a little chilly, though still sunny. Hope they were having a good day
Homer simpson in front of the "Smarch" calendar, in cold-weather gear. Captioned: "Lousy Smarch weather"
A double rainbow visible over the trees
a man trying to eat cereal with a comically large spoon; a spoon bigger than the bowl of cereal. The spoon is labeled "kubernetes" and the cereal labeled "static website"
two honkin' blueberry pancakes, with thicc butter slices & slathered with gingerbread maple syrup. sometimes i can cook the basics
A weird statue of a human form with tiger stripes and a tiger muzzle face. Not like a cool furry or something, but super weird looking, like the 2019 Cats movie. It is unsettling and abhuman
An email from Amazon saying they are now showing "limited" ads in all Prime Video, and you have to pay $2.99 per month to make it stop. "Prime is a very compelling value" it says. The kind of thing where if it were true, you wouldn't have to say it
The "Chatter Telephone" toy, in a high-contrast, noised-up, filter-heavy style reminiscent of the movie Skinamarink. This phone was such a farking jumpscare even when you know it's bloody coming!
A hand holding a small box of chocolate milk, labeled "Sukku Ladi Mjólk"
A "spotify wrapped" slide showing what Spotify thinks are my favorite genres. List is (in order): Uptempo Hardcore Rawstyle Frenchcore Hardcore Techno Euphoric Hardstyle Spotify also said I should move to Rotterdam in the Netherlands, so there's that
SFW Picture of an anthropomorphic dog with white fur, blue spots on his snoot, and blue ears. He has green eyes and is smiling at the viewer.
A four-panel recipe comic showing emptying a can of refried beans into a solid log of bean-mass, then wrapping it in a burrito tortilla into an ugly bean-flour-tube, then presenting it on a plate like a fancy dish instead of a lump of cowboy lunch
Reuben, from Ocean's Eleven, wearing a fancy robe witg open chest by the pool, sunglasses, and an excess of necklaces and rings
An older doggo with huge, droopy jowls and a wrinkly forehead and almost-closed eyes. Looks like the kinda fella that sits next to a rocking chair at a gas station - been there 13 years, seen it all, just happy to be lazy on another sunny day. Good doggo 11 out of 10
A close-up of an otter face captioned "What's this? A birthday? Hope it's a great one!"
A picture of the Scooby Doo gang, in front of a snowy antarctic research base. A husky approaches the group. Captioned: "Okay gang, keep your eyes peeled... there hasn't been any communication from this outpost for a while now... oh wait, there a dog coming towards us. Scooby, go see if he's friendly"
Photo of Daft Punk as they appeared in the movie Tron: Legacy
A picture of an opossum in the snow, looking somewhat haggard. It is captioned: "i don't know about u but i'm feeling fuckin stressed / everything would be alright if this bitch was not depressed"
A man holds out a carrot over a small fence to a group of 3 capybaras
A traffic light hangs from its post by a wire, mostly disassembled, but the red light still lit. It is captioned "Me being broken but still working because I need money to exist"
Bart simpson filling out a form staring at a potato on his desk. It reads "11:00 Start Experiment" and "11:30 Still just a potato"
Two vertical panels: a small opossum is captioned with "I'm fine" "No problem" "I am okay" , but in the second panel it is tinted red, blurred, and the poss appears to be screaming
A man in a Deadpool costume uses an angle grinder on a filing cabinet to make noise. There is a dildo on top of it
A bracket of combinations of drinks resulting in the "beverage of the gods." Strawberry jelly and barbecue sauce combine into strawbeque. Pepsi and milk combine into pilk. Sprite and NyQuil combine into lean. Ramen and gasoline combine into gamen. Strawbecue and pilk combine into strabequpik. Lean and gamen combine into leagamen. The final, unholy combination produces "beverage of the gods," a thick, brown, queasy-looking semi-liquid that will probably kill you.
the "i hate the antichrist" meme but it's about leetcode problems. A bug-eyed trollface man is drawn waiting with a rifle, saying "I hate Leetcode! I hate leetcode!" Two U.N. Agents enter his home saying "if you want food or shelter do these insane algorithm problems" and "please explain your thinking as you code." I realize "soyjack" and "schizoposting" are maybe in poor taste, but it's hard to convey the feeling of frustrated insanity that tech interviews will drive you to
picture of Mountain Dew's 2023 "Voo-Dew" mystery flavor, zero-sugar variant. Why zero sugar? I switched to diet decades ago and I'm not going back, even if they're equally as unhealthy as regular sugar. I will die on this hill, and it will be my funeral pyre and burial plot
A wikiHow style instructional drawing captioned "how to make friends in your thirties." In the first panel, a man draws a pentagram on the floor. In the second, he is playing basketball with a goat-headed Baphomet-like demon. I feel like Baphomet would have an unfair advantage on defense being tall and having big horns. Maybe tennis would be a better 1 vs 1 sport, although I guess it's less casual. Soccer?
The "peeling off highway" meme: instead of staying on the highway headed towards "making music, art, reading great novels" , the car peels off to the exit marked "3-hour Xenogears video essay" Is this a "society bad" meme? An "ADHD brain" joke? A meta-commentary on video media? I don't know, but I can tell you Miang is an incarnation of the Gnostic demiurge, birthed not by Eve in the cosmology but by the original mother-diety, and the giant robots are playing the part of
A piece of paper posted to a door titled "Password Change Sign Up Sheet" - it purports to be from I.T. And says if you put down your full name, system, current password, and desired new password, "I.T." Will change it for you. Several people have signed up and put all the requested info in pen. A sticky note is attached that says "Come see me - Shawn" presumably from an angry manager
a woman says "omg look you haven't relapsed you look so much happier than before!" a withered, malformed, destroyed husk of a man replies "yes, honey." It is hard to imagine that he might have been somehow worse "before," or that the way he is now qualifies as "better" than anything
Me applying as a cake decorator Interviewer: So, what kind of cake experience do you have? Me: Oh, let me tell ya... Four panel comic of a chonky opossum DESTROYING a cake in someone's living room. Just snarfing all of it down.fuzzy little face all covered in cake. It's cute, but obviously not what a cake decorator hiring a colleague is looking for.
Lucifer standing in front of three graphs, each showing a precipitous rise in: Anarchy, Pornography, Homosexuality. "The cat ears are working," he says
Quote from somewhere online: "In the first age, in the first battle, when the shadows first lengthened, one stood. Burned by the embers of Armageddon, his soul blistered by the fires of Hell and tainted beyond ascension, he chose the path of perpetual torment. In his ravenous hatred, he found no peace, and with boiling blood he scoured the Umbral Plains seeking vengeance against the dark lords who had wronged him. He wore the crown of the Night Sentinels, and those that tasted the bite of his sword named him... the Doom Slayer." UAC REPORT FILE H8UM66S
A hand holding some stickers with Sonic the Hedgehog and Tails on them that says "I got my dick sucked at the Sonic the Hedgehog Fan Theory Panel"
A picture of a baby capybara, adorably mislabeled as "kitty"
A two-panel comic. The first shows a man interviewing for a job, and the woman interviewing him asks "Who is this 'Apollo' you put here in your references?" The second panel shows Animal Crossing, where Apollo the eagle says "You are one reliable guy! Put me down as a reference on your next job application!"
Movie poster for John Carpenter's "The Thing"