Alex Goldman

@agoldman.bsky.social

30096 Followers 1888 Following

I make @hyperfixedpod.bsky.social and @amityvilleville.bsky.social. I used to make Reply All. One day I will be in the ground hopefully flowers will grow out of me.

Yassified emoji
DIVA 💅 DOWN ⬇️ FLIMSY 🍜 LINDSY 👵 Graham 👴 is on permanent 😭 RECESS 💀 today 📆 after taking 😳 a deep 😩 DICKING 🍆 💦 from 👏 a SEXY 🫦 ILLNESS ☣️ the senator 👴 from SOUTH ⬇️ CUNTOLINA 🇺🇸 💅 died 🪦 on FREE 💸 SLURPEE 🥤 DAY 📆 after a 👶 lifetime 👴 of SUCKING 🍆 😩 the life 💀 out of his 💅 CUNT 🍑 -STITUENTS 😏 While many 🙅‍♂️ will not 🚫 miss 🤷‍♂️ the notorious 💥 WAR 🔫 COCK 🍆 we must pour 🫗 one out 👉 for this 💃 SEXY 🫦 SLAYER 💀 down⬇️ south 🇺🇸 so send ✉️ ➡️ this to 🫵 your 🔟 most❗SEXUALLY 🍆 💦 AMBIGIOUS ⚧ CUNT🍑 -SERVE💅 -atives 💁‍♀️ if you 🫵 get 0️⃣ back 🍑 you're 👎 a real 😩 LENINGRAD 🇷🇺 LINDSEY 👴 if you 🫵 get 5️⃣ back 🍑 you're 😂 a certified ✅ GRAHAM 🍞 CRACKER 😳 and if 😩 you get 🔟 back 📩 you're a 😳 FULL 🍆 🍑 BLOWN 🌬️ LADY 🇬
Yoda says: after watching Alan J. Pakula’s Klute while standing in front of the television at 1:34 am Yoda says: 2:12 am… going back for more Klute
ADSR envelope tattoo
Text message from a friend: Wooof Idk how you’re doing this Seems so miserable My response: True growth never feels good. You do it because it’s necessary
A youtube video called: 1 hour of silence occasionally broken up by Michael Jackson sounds
A text from me to a friend: Jason momoa? What’s next, Jason Lawnmowa? Follow up text: don’t fucking ignore me
During a trip to Israel, Fetterman receives a silver-plated beeper from Netanyahu, a reference to the country’s military operation that used fake rigged with 🧨 fake