Alison Eales, Nerves of Steel

@alisoneales.com

4148 Followers 2157 Following

Thames in the streets, LWT in the sheets she/her alisoneales.com

A photo of a page from the XTC edition of Record Collector in which John Robb and Jerry Ewing argue pointlessly about whether XTC are ‘punks or proggers’
A photo of my hand holding a little conker in its spiky shell
A photo of the moon in a sickly blue sky with some trees just below it and electric wires crossing over and below it
A screenshot of a 1987 episode of Top of the Pops. Kenny G performing Songbird. The subtitle reads 'HE PLAYS SOPRANO SAX'
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Sisqó performing Got To Get It. The subtitle reads 'Wheel my ladies in!' (it was 'Where all my ladies at' but whatever)
A photo of a sunset. Venus is setting to the left of the picture
A photo of a London Weekend clock
A photo of a bedroom featuring a bed with white linen, a dark blue headboard and a pale blue table, a bedside lamp with an LWT lampshade, a framed print of Kent House, and a framed photo of Cannon and Ball on Blackpool Pier taken by Andy Hollingworth. Bubbles the Clown looks on
Dennis Waterman and George Cole
A photo of a page from a manual for a tumble dryer. The text reads: 'WARNING - Risk of poisoning! Condensation water from this appliance is not suitable for drinking and may be contaminated with fluff. Do not drink or reuse the condensation water from the appliance.'
A photo of a framed piece of paper with some Japanese lettering on it
A photo of a cardboard diorama of a jazz club called Toot Suite
An MS Paint drawing of Matt Goss looking gormless with the caption 'luckily there were bubels' in comic sans
A screenshot of the music video to Alone by Heart. The caption reads 'melancholy piano music'
A photo of my living room with neat piles of bubble wrap all over the floor
'Prince Harry dealt huge five-word blow in King Charles security row'
A screenshot of a 1989 episode of Top of the Pops. Gladys Knight performing Licence To Kill
A screenshot of a 1986 episode of Top of the Pops. Gary Numan performing I Can't Stop
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Manic Street Preachers performing The Masses Against The Classes
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Eurythmics performing 17 Again
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Point Break performing Stand Tough
A photo of a patch of lavender being visited by a Brimstone butterfly and a bumblebee
A picture of Rob Brydon interviewing four bottles of water of various sizes.
A photo of the square spirals doodle with my terrible handwriting behind it
A photo of two square spirals, in felt tip, one blue lines coloured in with red and the other red lines coloured in with blue
A photo of a bit of paper which I have covered in a biro doodle I do all the time. I call it 'square spirals'
A screenshot of a Facebook update I made almost exactly 13 years ago. 'Half-asleep idea for BBC1 sitcom: Penelope Keith is the unqualified but sexually rapacious manager of struggling local football team.'
A screenshot of The Good Life. Margo is in the garden. The subtitle reads 'Oh, I see! One of your jokes. Very good.'
'Eejanaika has several meanings, but is most commonly translated to "Ain't it great!" in English.'
‘Afterwards, another staff male member, who claimed to be in charge, came forward and said: "I'm sorry. I've been instructed we can't do the wig and the jacket. It's an absolute no."’
A screenshot of a 1979 episode of Top of the Pops. Thom Pace performing Maybe
A screenshot of a 1983 episode of Top of the Pops. Mike Oldfield performing Moonlight Shadow
A screenshot of a 1983 episode of Top of the Pops. The subtitle reads 'Number 8 - Toontje Lager and Stiekem'
A screenshot of a 1983 episode of Top of the Pops. Rod Stewart performing Baby Jane
A screenshot of a 1983 episode of Top of the Pops. Freeez performing IOU. The subtitle reads '#A-E-A-E-I-O-U-U I sometimes cry'
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Jamie Theakston saying 'According to the music press, this lot are the ones to watch.'
A screenshot of a 2000 episode of Top of the Pops. Jamie Theakston saying 'If you have the post-millennium blues, smile - it's S Club 7.'
My britmonkey political compass results. 83% woke, 53% neo-luddite, 56% doomer and 83% Davos. My closest match is Zohran Mamdani.
BUFFET CRAMPON (It’s a photo of a Bb clarinet made by Buffet Crampon, Paris)
A screenshot of emails between me and my brother Steve. Me: 'This is an email I have sent you an email' Him: 'Yes, I got your email.'
Brian Pern
'Wait, XTC is woke?' 'Always has been'
A photo of a little CRT telly showing an advert for a BDSM sex line. The caption on screen says 'MEESTERES ZOEKT SLAVEN'
A photo of the Ring Nebula against a black sky with other stars around it, taken with my little telescope
A photo of the moon against a black sky, taken with my little telescope
A photo of a fridge containing a pizza. The side of the box reads ‘with a charred & bubbly crust’
A photo of the sun through a solar filter, taken through my little telescope
A photo of a seagull sitting on an overflowing bin in the park
A photo of two boxes of fucking massive buns. The top ones are Cheddar, Walnut and Chilli Jam. The bottom ones are Chocolate Cinnamon and came with a big tub of dark chocolate ganache
A photo of a red t-shirt hanging on the back of a chair. It is illustrated with an angelic lyre
A 'prove you are human' test where you have to choose from nine AI-generated illustrations in a grid. The instruction is to 'Tap on everything that matches the reference'. The reference picture is of a duck and a hedgehog eating a burger. There are three pictures of dogs wearing hats, three pictures of squirrels with tiny basketballs, and three pictures of hedgehogs. No ducks. No burgers. Just hedgehogs.
A screenshot from a Turkish cinema documentary in which a Turkish director holds up a copy of the soundtrack to Il Grande Silenzio (The Great Silence). The subtitle reads 'Suspense music'
A screenshot from the Turkish cinema documentary in which director Kunt Tulgar is saying 'When they swallow it, you can call yourself lucky'
Craig McLachlan's video for Mona. The subtitle reads 'I'll build a house next door to you'
Janet kicking fuck out of a wooden chair
A screenshot of a 1999 episode of Top of the Pops. S Club performing Bring It All Back
A screenshot of a 1999 episode of Top of the Pops. Eiffel 65 performing Blue (Da Ba Dee)
A screenshot of a 1999 episode of Top of the Pops. Martine McCutcheon performing Perfect Moment