Astronautpants

@astronautpants.bsky.social

1606 Followers 418 Following

My astrology readings are open! https://astronautpantsastrology.com/

A screenshot from Rebecca Traister where she posts an essay that says "perfect day and perfect venue to publish a column in which I publicly acknowledge that I liked Graham Platner, correct?" with a link to nymag
Two cherry pickers working on a temporary power line with some cars on the road headed towards them
Three panels are horizontal, the 1st is Lucille Bluth saying "saying nice things about you is easy." 2nd panel Lindsey Bluth saying "oh, Mom..." 3rd panel Lucille says "the hard part is not sounding sarcastic"
A physically improbable rearing wooden statue of a horse, whose stomach is open and full of popcorn. Its hind legs stand in a field of popcorn
For the show to work, it can’t be men who are telling these young women to play pianoforte, stuff themselves into corsets, or avoid untoward contact with their lovers. It has to be other women who are pushing them for an heir, telling them to forgive the men for their rakish behavior, encouraging them that marriage and children will be their greatest joy. When living fathers do appear—Cressida Cowper’s domineering father a prime example—their obsession with marriage and offspring comes off as evil and controlling. But when it’s women telling other women that marriage is the route to self-actualization, that Mary Wollstonecraft’s critical assessment of marriage “does not sufficiently value love,” we’re meant to find it inspiring.
Jo March from the 2020 film Little Women gesturing with her hands splayed at chest height saying "women"
A white dog with a tulle tutu in green, yellow, and purple walking in the neighborhood Mardi Gras parade
Black cat with white underfur contemplating the universe
A news clipping with the mugshot of a blonde white woman that reads "a Florida woman has been accused of driving a motorized shopping cart through a Target while drinking wine from the bottle and eating sushi and cinnamon rolls
A black woman with short blonde hair, sitting at a table making puffy paint hearts on a shirt, while wearing a turtleneck under a pink sweatshirt that she has puffy painted FUCK ICE in red letters. The caption reads, Connie is using the snow day to catch up on her Valentine's day designs -hearts emoji- hopefully she does run out of puffy paint like the last time is snowed -monkey w paws over its eyes emoji
J Walter Weatherman looking into a car window saying, "and that's why you always leave a note" to the Bluth children in the back of the car, while George Bluth Sr is in the front
The back of the head of a black cat, watching a flock of birds in the grass through the window
My cat appropriating my lap from my laptop
A tall mashroom, with a beige stalk and brown cap is being inspected by a grey snail with a swirling shell of red to orange to yellow outlined in black. All are made of Legos and set in the dirt of a garden, with some fluffy grass behind it
What knit stitches look like up close on the needles. Ironically found on google
Illuminated elves walking through the woods to the Grey Havens
Ignore my messy kitchen/living room. My over moistured face next to a big green leaf of collards I'm about to cook up
A screenshot from Meriam Webster's your word of the year, it says GOAT
Two tall trees without leaves but covered in ivy. In the middle, perched on a branch of the left tree is a hawk.
Rizzo the rat and Gonzo aka Charles Dickens bopping noses in a touching moment in Muppet Christmas Carol
Two older British ladies smiling and high with googlie-eyed glasses, one gesturing with an ice cream cornet and the other with her hand in a box of cornflakes
A drawing of a man whose hands and head are encased in a wooden block held up on a post. Two men are looking at him from behind
A black cat with yellow eyes staring straight ahead as she stands on a scratching pad on a red and blue fake oriental rug
Lt Commander Data sitting next to Jenna, who is clutching his arm in a familiar manner. He is looking at her quizzically and she is delusionally excited
Freya, a black cat, lying on a white herringbone blanket with a blue paisley blanket behind her
A screenshot of Dr Ali A. Olomi's latest Patreon video lecture titled "The Jinn: History, Origins, and Mystery"
Celine Dion, in a leather jacket over her shoulders saying into a phone, "je telephone a la police"
Chatty Morn from DS9
Anne Elliot telling Captain Benwick that "uh, too much poetry may be...unsafe" in mourning the loss of his fiancee
Padme turned towards Anakin Skywalker as he says the dumbest line that also makes sense, "I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere."
A person who has never spoken to me ever, and a screenshot of their emo quote tweet. It reads: "No. I despise this world. A lot of you suck and for no reason just because." The original post from me reads: Now, more than ever, it's time to cultivate your inner monologue AND talk to people irl
A box of celestial seasonings tension tamer tea, with an illustration of a green dragon and a woman wearing a red dress sitting on them. There is a castle in the background. There's a mug with a snail on it full of tea beside the box
A red tailed hawk perched on a power line with a big oak tree behind her. She's busy hunting
1/4 article
Three peach quarters on an off-white plate with stippled designs around the edge
A yellow butterfly with black borders landing on a pink flower amidst green shrubs
Baby bunny in the brown ground, blending in whole munching on the green bush to the right
The web page of the DeKalb library system with a note in yellow at the top that says "All DeKalb County Public Library locations are currently without internet service and computer access"
Green striped and bright yellow fruits hanging from a branch of tough dark green leaves
A young brown bunny overwhelmed by all the grass in the yard and my camera, ears back
Two panels, the top one is Lt Worf looking at Keiko giving birth and telling her, Congratulations. You are fully dilated to 10 centimeters. You may now give birth." And the second panel is Keiko, with clenched teeth holding back from murdering Worf but only bc she's fully dilated to 10 cm and giving birth.
Two fireflies flickering at dusk against the background of greenery and my driveway
Geordie Le Forge and his hollodeck engine designer/unwitting girlfriend giving him a shoulder massage after he tweaked the program to make her more personable. Unfortunately, your fake gf does not have a real world equivalent to burst your bubble
An illustration from the book Strega Nona, a grandmother in a kerchief and apron tending to a cauldron of spaghetti
A long-haired black cat sitting across my lap in loaf form, with no thoughts in her head and suffering from hiccups
A screenshot of a newsletter update about HeroRAT Bakara! It reads: Dear Anna, Your adopted HeroRat Bakara has had another productive month in Angola's Cuanza Sul province. In April, he helped clear 1,270 sq meters of land and located one item of unexploded ordinance (UXO) - an 82 mm mortar. Picture of: Bakara sits on his handler Raul's shoulder after a work session This is only the 2nd explosive item Bakara has found during his deployment so far, but that makes his contribution no less valuable.
A black cat's right side from the back, looking at a bunny out the window through a screen in the back yard
A screenshot of a music app playing Diet Pepsi by Addison Rae
A newsletter update about the rat, Bakara, who has cleared 2800 square meters of land in Angola
A Cornish hen that a fork and a knife are slicing into on a plate with the subtitles that say "where we exhumed a body four years after"
Screenshot of a podcast from Ali A. Olomi's Patreon, the episode is Jupiter in Medieval Astrology from the Islamic World
6 chicken nuggets in a cute bowl that is red on the inside and blue on the outside
A book cover that reads: What My Bones Know: a Memoir of healing from complex trauma by Stephanie Foo in yellow letters with a design of tropical plants, fruits, feathers and bones on a dark blue background.
Salem the cat in a green baseball cap, a gray sweater and safety googles around his neck near electrical equipment saying "I'm on a journey of self-discovery"
A selfie of a woman with long blond hair with a black dress and silver sweater with the Sun peeking out on the right side