The Living Man Bill Ferris

@billferris.bsky.social

1112 Followers 396 Following

I write things and make training courses. Chapel Hill-adjacent.

Kermit the Frog
The epic handshake meme. One arm says Gordon Lightfoot says the swarm of yellow jackets under my back porch. together they equal, "sundown you'd better take care if I find you've been creeping around my back stairs"
Energy vampire Colin Robinson saying something tedious
A rock hanging from a sign. The sign says: Lake Shetek's Weather Station Wet rock: rain Dry rock: Fair White rock: snow Swinging rock: windy Invisible Rock: fog
Fake movie poster from 30 Rock: transformers 5. Planet of the Earth. Written by no one.
Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes unable to sleep.
Every video I have seen of Zohran Mamdani this week feels like watching a '90s movie called kid mayor where every idea works and he wears a basketball jersey under a suit jacket and his main villain is Donald Trump.
Baseball player standing in front of a sign that says Honkbal Week
As is the case with much of the Trump era, Trump has erected another perfect monument to the record-setting corruption he represents. They say the rich don’t get that way by spending money, and he hasn’t. As your eyes take in fake building pedestals hovering two feet off the ground, you immediately get how, per Media Matters’ Matthew Gertz, Trump needed only a year to take home 110 times the amount that the “Biden Crime Family” earned in its entire confabulated existence. Put another way: You may not agree with what Freedom250 has to say, but you can see every dollar of the undisclosed private-sector donations, diverted funding and no-bid contract they didn’t spend on it.
Who are you cashing a cootie queen you LINT LICKER?!?!
Weird AI slop image of trump as Jesus
Homer imagining himself flying a hang glider and firing a laser
Smelly Steve has joined the zoom meeting Smelly Steve: sorry I smel so bad guys lol Diane: we cant smell you Steve, it's zoom Smelly Steve has shared a file: BODYSTINK.ODOR (6.3GB)
Cracks Diet Pepsi* Ahh...Refreshing Diet Peppi *Slowly Sips, Then Gulps, The Diet Pappo** Ahh, Diet Parpo. Thank's To The Papor-Colla Corp.
Benjamin Ryan @benryanwriter I have people over to dinner about 15 to 20 times per year. I am invited over to dinner zero to one time per year. People often behave as if a social invitation is an onerous burden. They are in a long-term relationship with themselves.
Fearrington Cares is Closed Today Due to forecasted severe weather, the Fearrington Cares Center will be closed today. Otago and AA are cancelled; however, the End of Life Planning program is on as scheduled via Zoom.
Carry Oil with Truck by Land
JUST HEADED DOWN TO THE DUMP WITH THESE CHILDREN'S LETTERS TO GOD.
With great power comes great pastabilities
Homer stuck in a waterslide
Mr. Burns from the Simpsons spitballing a name for a bullshit award: The first annual Montgomery Burns uh...award for... Outstanding achievement in the field of... Excellence
Danhausen
A spooky looking plague ship
Disappointed a milkshake is just called a milkshake in the UK. I would've guess it was something real perverted like a curd sweetie or lovie cream
Onion headline: Man brings lunch from home to cut down on small joys
Two dudes wearing sweatshirts that say "Punts"
Two dudes wearing sweatshirts that say "Punts"
That pole vaulter who lost at the Olympics because his dick hit the bar
Radioactive man, about to be burned in acid, and only some useless goggles to protect him
Facebook ad: Replace doomscrolling with engineering micro-lessons
I am feel uncomfortable when we are not about me?
Tim Robinson making an excited face
Homer holding a certificate that says "NOT INSANE"
A 1970s-era conversation pit with a piano and everything
YOU KNOW, TWITTER TURNED INTO A CHILD PORN CREATION APP SO GRADUALLY, I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE.
Mr burns from the Simpsons speaking in an auditorium. He says: ...AND THE BOLD NEW IDEAS THESE TINY TYKES UNVEIL FOR US TODAY COULD MAKE THOUSANDS OF JOBS LIKE YOURS OBSOLETE!
UNC vs KU basketball game with a graphic that says "Dickie V's Super 6 Diaper Dandies"
Every question has a cousin, and suddenly they're multiplying.
Am apple pie
Post from calltoactivism: Holy shit. It just occurred to me that Biden completely played Trump by signaling a hidden message. Check. Out. That. Fire.
Promo image for TV series THE BEAR. The cast is in the kitchen, standing upright. Carmy is in the center of the frame, but he alone was photographed from above, so it looks like he's flying toward the camera like Superman.
"A canticle for liebowitz" in the zohran sign meme format
Skin care consultant, Rowena
Bearded white guy with a toothpick in his mouth, dressed kinda like Jackie Daytona from what we do in the shadows
A protest sign in the format of a checklist. It says: NOT DONE YET: Ceasefire END occupation END apartheid REBUILD Gaza The Hague
The dominant ideology of silicon valley right now is "God does not exist, but he soon will, and he will be our slave"
Mr. Burns from the submissions zonked out of his mind, glowing in the dark from radiation
Bill Belichick and Jordan Hudson
Gordon Cole from twin peaks
Tim Robinson explaining the shit he did or did not rig
Moe from The Simpsons holding two knives and saying, I gotta tell you, this is pretty terrific.
A krusty the clown alarm clock says: It's Tuesday the 1st! If you live in krusty brand low income housing, your rent is due!
A Hello Fresh recipe card for a dish called San Antonio Beef Bowls