Choire

@choire.bsky.social

7792 Followers 73 Following

I work at cnn where I am the guy who rakes up the extra piles of news at night

Can you believe people wanted to end Lena Dunhams career when she is literally all we have EW Entertainment Weekly • @EW • 13h 'Girls' creator Lena Dunham reportedly drew 'gasps and laughs' with a gay porn football joke at Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's wedding, in the presence of several NFL players. ew.com/ lena-dunham-ga... 12:14 PM • 7/4/26 • 26K Views 1 27 31 > 838 贝 6 ColinAlexander • @Nellyfurtad 1..•1h Ø She's like if Tina Fey was 40
The bison's return has been slower than the bald eagle's, and has needed more active help. The billionaire animal lover Ted Turner helped bison rebound, growing a herd of 45,000 bison across six states. (Turner was CNN's founder. He also co-founded a restaurant chain that serves various bison dishes.) They've been reintroduced to the West and Great Plains; now they've recovered to the point that tourists at Yellowstone National Park ignore warnings and are gored by the beasts when they get too close.
[notification from NEW YORK MAG] Will My Kid Be Annoying? 1m ago Writer Whitney Friedlander inherited her dad's habit of saying and doing inappropriate things. Now she's making sure her own child doesn't follow suit.
How do you fix this? To treat BPPV, you’ll do specific head movements to clear the crystals out of the canal. One of these movements is called the Epley maneuver. The movements may make you feel worse while you’re doing them. Don’t worry! Feeling worse doing the movement is a good sign – it means the crystals are moving. The movements work very well to put the crystals back in place when you do them correctly.
Max Tani: “Per a note to NYT staff this afternoon, T magazine EIC Hanya Yanagihara will be stepping down “to pursue opportunities in theater.”” Daniel Lefferts: “Bone chilling”
TODAY'S FILMS GOODBYE, DRAGON INN 11:00am CINDERELLA 11:00am POLICE STORY 12:45pm STROMBOLI 1:00pm THE NAKED ISLAND 2:50pm SANS LENDEMAIN 3:15pm CACHÉ 5:00pm UNCLE MUSTACHE + JOURNEY + WAITING 5:10pm AS TEARS GO BY 7:25pm HARMONICA 7:30pm SAFE 9:30pm BODY DOUBLE 9:30pm
This is Ohio State performing at the universal dance association. I’m sorry I don’t have the words to describe it!
“I’m a physician,” the man says, his hands in the air. “Can I go check a pulse?” ICE officer: “No! Back up! Now!” Doctor: “I’m a physician!” ICE officer: “I don’t care!”
The visual element you would need to know is that this is a hand hitting play on a laptop that is playing the scene from Titanic where they’re at the front of the boat with their arms out and the person who hit play is walking towards a giant church organ in the room and then the Titanic shows up on screen.
A Palm Treo, a Sidekick, and an Apple iPhone first gen.
Another version where you pop out the batteries with two switches
A Mac laptop where one twist of a screw pops out the computer’s battery.
Ancient ass Mac laptop with a thousand ports
New York Mag: For help imagining Eyes Wide Shut’s orgy sequence, Kubrick sought the expertise of two unconventional scholars: Gershon Legman, an erotic folklorist who provided historical context on the sexual customs of Schnitzler-era Vienna, and Dr. C.J. Scheiner, a New York emergency-room physician with a Ph.D. in erotology, who, over a series of long phone calls, gave him a crash course in 4,000 years of group sex. As production neared, Kubrick asked Scheiner about his personal knowledge of modern orgies. “I had, as a nonparticipating observer, researched this part of the social scene since the 1960s and had extensive first- and secondhand knowledge of American and European organized group sexual activity, from home parties to elegant weekend orgies in a château outside of Paris,” Scheiner tells me. Nothing in their conversations, he says, suggested the film was inspired by any real sex cult. And, “based on the questions he asked,” Scheiner adds, “my impression is that Kubrick had no — or very little — firsthand experience with orgies himself.”
A librarian with multiple jokes.
Highway offramp sign that says GRIMES
Like basically AI slop of Muslim clerics dog-walking cops down Fifth Avenue lol
A Saudi man feeds a hooker goat money from a limo? The goat is in heels?
Daily Mail: Devastating impact of Mamdani's election will be FAR WORSE than first thought: Exclusive poll finds America's greatest city facing 'historic' population wipeout: Nearly one million New Yorkers are preparing to flee the city should democratic socialist Zohran Mamdani win the race for mayor, a devastating new poll has found.
Reddit post: “how bad actually was COVID?” That reads: “ was around 9 years old when the pandemic started and I barely have any memories of it. I do remember the lockdown, wearing masks everywhere, online school, getting sick with it twice (it felt like the normal flu), but my family still went out like to the beach or the mountains. I guess it’s because my mom shielded me from the news and all but idk.”
Bird!
Store full of eggnog
“Thoughts on Taylor”
Gender neutral bathroom with a sign saying please use women’s room
A ten second Sora video of me explaining fracking to kids on the moon.
Amazon listing: Animolds Hug Me Giant Rubber Chicken- Huge Stress Relief Screaming Chicken Toy | Screams Up to 45 Seconds- Novelty Gag and Prank Toys | Funny Toys Gifts for Christmas Stocking Stuffers for Kids Adult With picture of a guy saying “making your mondays just a bit better”
Tweet screenshot: “CNN live blogging like this is the papal conclave 😭😭” with a screenshot of CNN’s Taylor Swift podcast appearance.
Around the same time, the finance department asked some staffers to comb through Muldoon’s previous expenses and note anything they couldn’t account for. At that point, they realized there were hundreds of thousands of dollars in suspicious spending. Right before Muldoon was scheduled to come back from her medical leave, she told a colleague that she had requested more time off, which the company denied. When she came back, she was terminated. Colleagues were told that she had been fired for misuse of company funds. Three months later, she was on a flight to Mexico that she had paid for on the company card when she was still at Food52. To her old colleagues, it seemed like Muldoon had gotten away with it. “She basically walked away with all of the clothes. And the memories,” said a former staffer. While she had blocked most of her former colleagues on social media, some still had access, watching in awe as she ran the New York City Marathon despite her alleged medical issues and relocated to Los Angeles. In February 2024, she was hired at Substack as its podcast and video acquisition-and-development lead. She was employed for fewer than 90 days.
What song by the band Blondie contains a rap section that reveals a connection to the rising hip hop movement in New York?
Fox News screenshot about “the left’s inauthenticity” which includes “trying to appeal to men.”
Cuomo and his closest allies were combative to the end. When asked by CNN on Tuesday morning what Cuomo’s schedule was for primary day beyond a brief appearance to vote, communications director Rich Azzopardi said he didn’t know and that Cuomo was “in his car.”
Thom: In 2021, I was able to apologize to Cassandra for the night with the bike helmet, for not being a better friend to her, and for being a bad communicator. She had also asked me not to drink around her, and though I respected that for a couple of months, I eventually broke that promise as well, so I apologized for that. Cassandra: That made me feel like we could start rebuilding trust. Thom: We started meeting for coffee. We’d walk her dog and have picnics in parks around the city. There was a lot of cooking: pickled magnolia flowers, ramp lasagna, gochujang-caramel cookies.
My empty subway car!
Now reduced to $220,300: an absolute crap boarded-up 664 square foot house.
Ishtar playing at MoMA
Columbia’s feebleness this spring has dismayed the many students, faculty, and alumni who wish it would wage a more principled fight against Trump — as Harvard has done by suing his administration in federal court. But even Trump’s allies failed to predict how much of a pushover it has been. “I was surprised by how quickly and how completely the university folded,” Christopher Rufo, a senior fellow at the Manhattan Institute who helped develop the strategy to crush Columbia, told me.
A 664 square foot house that's boarded up in Putnam Valley NY for $231, 800.
My local movie theater where the marquee reads “happy birthday alpha”
I’VE DECIDED TO LEAVE THIS GROUP BECAUSE IT HAS COMPLETELY SHIFTED AWAY FROM ITS ORIGINAL PURPOSE. WHEN I FIRST JOINED, THIS SPACE WAS MEANT TO BE A LIGHTHEARTED PLACE WHERE PEOPLE COULD COME TOGETHER, UNWIND, AND HAVE FUN. IT WAS A PLACE WHERE HUMOR THRIVED, WHERE JOKES WERE SHARED WITHOUT FEAR OF OFFENDING ANYONE, AND WHERE EVERYONE COULD LAUGH TOGETHER. UNFORTUNATELY, OVER TIME, IT HAS BECOME MORE FOCUSED ON POLITICS, AND AS A RESULT, THE ATMOSPHERE HAS COMPLETELY CHANGED. WHAT WAS ONCE A SPACE FOR LAUGHTER AND CAMARADERIE NOW FEELS LIKE A BATTLEGROUND FOR DIFFERING OPINIONS. I NEVER EXPECTED A GROUP MEANT FOR COMEDY TO DEVOLVE INTO ENDLESS POLITICAL DEBATES. I CAME HERE TO RELAX AND TAKE A BREAK FROM THE HEAVINESS OF THE WORLD, NOT TO BE BOMBARDED BY ARGUMENTS ABOUT POLICIES, IDEOLOGIES, OR WHO’S RIGHT AND WHO’S WRONG. I UNDERSTAND THAT POLITICS ARE IMPORTANT TO SOME PEOPLE, BUT IT FEELS LIKE THIS GROUP HAS LOST ITS SENSE OF HUMOR IN FAVOR OF BICKERING OVER ISSUES THAT HAVE NO PLACE HERE. THE FUN AND LIGHTNESS THAT INITIALLY DREW US TOGETHER HAVE BEEN REPLACED BY HOSTILITY AND TENSION. IT’S FRUSTRATING TO SEE HOW QUICKLY THIS COMMUNITY HAS CHANGED. AT FIRST, THERE WAS A SENSE OF UNITY, A SHARED UNDERSTANDING THAT WE WERE ALL HERE TO ESCAPE THE STRESS OF DAILY LIFE THROUGH LAUGHTER. BUT NOW, INSTEAD OF SHARING JOKES OR FUNNY STORIES, WE’RE CONSTANTLY NAVIGATING HEATED DISCUSSIONS. THERE’S NO ROOM FOR FUN ANYMORE BECAUSE THE SPACE HAS BEEN OVERTAKEN BY CONTENTIOUS DEBATES. THE ORIGINAL VIBE OF THIS GROUP HAS BEEN COMPLETELY OVERSHADOWED BY POLITICAL DISAGREEMENTS, AND IT’S HARD TO ENJOY ANYTHING WHEN EVERY CONVERSATION FEELS LIKE IT COULD SPIRAL INTO AN ARGUMENT. I CAME HERE TO SHARE JOKES AND GOOD TIMES, NOT TO CONSTANTLY WALK ON EGGSHELLS, WONDERING WHETHER THE NEXT POST WILL SPARK A POLITICAL DEBATE. COMEDY IS SUPPOSED TO UNITE US, NOT DIVIDE US, BUT THAT’S NOT WHAT THIS GROUP HAS BECOME. LAUGHTER HAS BEEN REPLACED BY ANGER, AND INSTEAD OF FINDING COMMON GROUND…
Four people at an office party in front of balloons that spell out ANXIETY.
Still from the Nathan Fielder with... what looks like Nathan playing a young boy in an oversized room with a giant adult holding a toy plane??? I DON'T KNOW.
I got a call from a very good guy, and friend of mine, Kid Rock, asking me whether or not it would be possible for me to meet, in the White House, with Bill Maher, a man who has been unjustifiably critical of anything, or anyone, TRUMP. I really didn’t like the idea much, and don’t like it much now, but thought it would be interesting. The problem is, no matter how much he likes your Favorite President, ME, he will publicly proclaim what a terrible guy I am, etc., very much like the Democrats at my recent Address to the Joint Session of Congress, where I stated, correctly, that no matter what I said or did, they wouldn’t stand, they wouldn’t applaud, they wouldn’t smile or laugh and, certainly, they wouldn’t be in any way “nice.” Who knows, though, maybe I’ll be proven wrong? In any event, I’m doing a favor for a friend. I look forward to meeting with Bill Maher, Kid Rock and, I believe, even the Legendary Dana White will be present. It might be fun or, it might not, but you will be the first to know!
These Friskies snack packs are called Lil’ Slurprises :(
“Luigi needs peach by his side” oh no
How does 39 feel? My father died when he was 39. I was 8 when he was 39. All my life I’ve wondered about 39 and never wondered about 40 at all. 39, 2 months and a day was how old he was when he died. I got a bit obsessive about that. The sixth of December it was, and leading up to it, and still now, it’s a very odd feeling. A lot of it was connected to figuring out who my dad was. I think I’ve projected forward all my life this idea, this image of what it will be like when I’m 39. Also, it makes me realize how young he was.
Radical Optimism has more in common with last year's big smash Brat than you might assume. They're both "Is that all there is?" albums, surrendering to mortality and the pitch-dark void. But what's darker: the club or the couple form? One refrain on "End of an Era" goes, "Another girl falls in love, another girl leaves the club / Send a big kiss good-bye to all of the pretty eyes (end of an era) / Another girl falls in love, another girl leaves the club." With each album, Dua’s perspective has matured and even tilted into a gratifying melancholia. I can only hope that this khia breaks out of the asylum in short order. FREE DUA, YOU GUYS.
The opening shot of Terminator: “Los Angeles: 2029 AD.” Atop devastation. :/
“This isn’t about data”