Patrick

@cleverturnip.bsky.social

600 Followers 274 Following

Alabama transplant in Chicago.

headline for AI slop website ad: Side sleepers get achy shoulders, few know this side sleeper trick image: a smiling man laying on his side. He is made entirely out of cardboard for some reason but has human teeth and eyes
glass lemon juicer with a lemon half on it
Tavern goers will no longer order a drink from every single tavern keeper in the bar and drink them all, causing them to die of acute alcohol poisoning. Tavern keepers will now refuse orders for drinks if the one ordering it is sufficiently drunk (if their personality allows.) Dwarves will exercise self-control and not order alcohol from tavern-keepers when drunk (if their personality allows.)
Penalties for possession Once reclassified, possession of banned products — those containing more than trace non-Delta-9 THC isomers or extracts — is treated as possession of a controlled substance under rules analogous to Penalty Group 2 of the Texas Health & Safety Code. These are felony-level offenses even for small amounts: Less than 1 gram: State jail felony — 180 days to 2 years in a state jail facility, plus a fine up to $10,000. 1 gram to less than 4 grams: Third-degree felony — 2 to 10 years in prison, plus a fine up to $10,000. 4 grams to less than 400 grams: Second-degree felony — 2 to 20 years in prison, plus a fine up to $10,000. 400 grams or more: First-degree felony — 5 to 99 years or life in prison, plus a fine up to $50,000.
White House Chief of Staff Andrew Card whispering the news of 9/11 to George Bush in a classroom
For years, Cockburn worked on The Nation, where a young Miliband was once an intern. Before his death last year, the late journalist recalled having this conversation: "I asked the future leader what I asked all interns as a matter of form, 'Eddie, is your hate pure?' The man who first asked me that question was the late Jim Goode, editor of Penthouse … It was a good way of assaying interns. The feisty ones would respond excitedly: 'Yes, my hate is pure.' I put the question to Eddie Miliband. He gaped at me in shock like Gussie Fink-Nottle watching one of his newts vanish down the plug-hole in his bath. 'I … I … don't hate anyone, Alex,' he stammered. It's all you need to know."
placard showing a photo of the 8th Wisconsin Infantry. Seven men in Union Civil War uniforms stand with rifles and bayonets. One man has a live bald eagle on a stand. Caption: Wisconsin Veterans A living memorial to and in honor of all Wisconsin veterans, living and dead, of all wars in which the United States of America has engaged. Color guard of the 8th Wisconsin Infantry Regiment with Old Abe at Vicksburg, Mississippi, 1863. The contributions of Wisconsin veterans date to the Civil War, when over 90,000 men took up arms to preserve the Union at places like Antietam, Vicksburg and Gettysburg. Since then, numerous Wisconsin men and women have served in our nation's military during times of peace and war. Photo courtesy of the Wisconsin Veterans Museum
Opening of the public tv game show So You Think You Know Maine
black and white photo of Roy Orbison in his shades
During the post-show chat, Behar also said she suggested to Vance that he run for president because she liked his vibe. She later told Teta she didn’t think the vice president was a “bad guy” and thought he might be “kinder” as president than Trump.
scene from the movie Troll 2: a group of trolls feast on a puddle of green goo while a motionless man stands and watches nearby
A screenshot of a facebook conversation. Person A: Gonna keep repeating this until it's no longer true: making US roads as safe as Canadian or European roads would save more lives than eliminating murder from the US. Person B: good evening Person A! So you want all the car owners to kill themselves? Or is it just me you want dead? Person A: so I can't have an opinion about any infrastructure if I don't commute regularly? Only the polluters get an opinion? you're mischaracterizing it but okay Person B: no I’m not. That’s exactly what you said. I can’t share the screen shot on here. You know what you said. Must be nice to work from home and tell others what’s best for them!
bottle of Pony Malta. The logo has a horse, and the tagline reads "nutritious energy with vitamins"
roger moore in a clown disguise in Octopussy
Facebook post in Albany Park News and Things by Boris Xvii So tired of these bike lanes, extended cross walks, and dividers. They are ruining the city, making it impossible to drive, making streets look unsightly, and I can only imagine how much it cost. Great job dumb politicians. All so Timmy can ride his bike🤡s
“I have three little kids, and I’ll do prompt engineering for a good story. I’m like, ‘I want it to be for a 6-year-old, and I want it to be about helicopters,’” Auchincloss, who is 38, said. “They love it, they’ll tell me, ‘Dad, tell us a story from your phone!’” https://www.notus.org/congress/democrats-ai-claude-chatbot-trump-social-media-congress
90s news anchor with an onscreen graphic reading "now it's everyone's problem"
scene from 30 rock, altered to change "coffee" to "parking." Dennis: One word: parking. One problem. Where do you get it? Liz: Anywhere! You get it anywhere!
line from The Uncensored Boris Godunov: The Case for Pushkin's Original Comedy, describing a Russian skomorokh traveling musician as a "minstrel-cum-clown"
Dwarf Fortress screengrab showing 2 deposits of morganite, each about 2x3 in length
the Kid From Brooklyn, the Big Man
local news screencap with a graphic reading: "now it's everyone's problem"
Steam forum post: MrPurple33 has Deep Rock Galactic Feb 2, 2024 @ 6:53pm Way to Necro a 2 Year+ Old Post Even if you Legit are having this problem, make a New Post so it can be Addressed- Because of the Date at the Top of this one, it won't get Attention I only came on here because I'm a Freak for anything Purple and wanted to see what The Violet Menace's Pic Looked Like Last edited by MrPurple33; Feb 2, 2024 @ 6:59pm The Violet Menace has Deep Rock Galactic Feb 3, 2024 @ 12:51pm Lmao
bluesky post: Not really sure how you can see Evelyn Normielib (D, Texas) setting fire to a facility that might have the possibility of becoming an ICE concentration camp and despair about how Dem primary voters are gonna pick Gavin "We are Charlie Kirk" Newsom as the nominee
AL.com story about an anti-ICE high school walkout: They found themselves with plenty of support from motorists passing by as rush hour approached along one of the growing city’s main thoroughfares with several vehicles honking their horns for support. Schools Superintendent Ed Nichols applauded student leaders for agreeing to shift the protest from a school walkout to an after-school gathering to express their views. Reporting by Scott Turner Read more at article linked in comments some dipshit named Rob Leopard: How do you know it was in support? When I honk my horn it is never in support of someone else's actions.
WBEZ news story post on facebook: Miramar Martinez, shot by border patrol in Chicago speaks out after Good, Pretti deaths: "I am their voice" Commenter Richard Graves: Maybe try, not inserting yourself into federal law enforcement actions? Other commenter: so why did the DOJ drop all charges and their "case" against Martinez? Richard Graves: Politics. What the politics doesn't change the fact that she's a moron. There's ways for us to protest, and actually all that protesting is b******* anyway. We should be standing on pushing our elected officials to do something other than posture. We should be seeking actual policy changes seeking amnesty programs for illegals have been in the country for 5 years or more without committing any crimes to get residency and for 15 years or longer to get full citizenship.
Debs feared that the presence of Federal troops in Chicago would serve, not to keep the peace, but to inflame the populace, and he heatedly told a United Press reporter: The first shots fired by the regular soldiers at the mobs here will be the signal for a civil war. I believe this as firmly as I believe in the ultimate success of our course. Bloodshed will follow, and ninety percent of the people of the United States will be arrayed against the other ten per cent. And I would not care to be arrayed against the laboring people in the contest or find myself out of the ranks of labor when the struggle ended. This prediction proved all too true. Although there had been brief but serious outbreaks in the suburbs on June 30 and July 2, no violence had occurred in Chicago before July 5. On that day railroad tracks were blocked, a freight train was stalled, a signal house was burned. The regular soldiers made a bayonet charge against a crowd, and several people were injured....The presence of the Army had indeed proved to be a "signal for civil war," as Debs said; but the hundreds of special Federal deputy marshals had an even worse effect. Since men with regular employment were unwilling to accept these temporary jobs, Marshal Arnold had deputized labor spies, professional strikebreakers, racketeers, petty gangsters, the flotsam and jetsam of the city. Several public officials fiercely attacked these special deputies. Governor Waite of Colorado called them "desperadoes" who had been hired "without any regard for their qualifications but simply for military purposes." On July 6 near Pullman, where a mob of hoodlums was overturning freight cars, one of these deputies deliberately killed an innocent spectator
a sign reading "midvale school for the gifted" next to a boy pushing on a door labeled "pull"
that’s what it means. Writing—I do, obviously, find it immensely arduous. My editor—who, whenever I introduce him as my editor, always says, “easiest job in town”—he says that the paralysis I have about writing is caused by an excessive reverence for the written word, and I think that’s probably true.
Variety magazine facebook post: #FranLebowitz says she voted for New York Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani, and among many qualities, loves "how upset he made the old Democrats." https://wp.me/pc8uak-1lGDYQ "And I’m an old Democrat. I’m sick of these guys — and they’re almost all guys. It’s been really bad for the country. This country was never meant to have politicians in lifetime roles. So, the hysteria… I like that about him. He seems earnest, by which I mean he believes the things he says. People keep saying how young he is. He’s 34. I think he’s too old to believe these things, frankly. When I was 34, I was long past believing this kind of stuff. But I think it’s adorable."
stock photo of someone giving an embarrassed shrug
Reuters: Border patrol agent who shot Chicago woman boasted about it in text messages By Renee Hickman November 7, 20259:10 AM CST Updated 6 hours ago Image: Law enforcement officers during a standoff with U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) and federal officers in the Little Village neighborhood of Chicago, Illinois, U.S., October 4, 2025. REUTERS/Jim Vondruska/File Photo
Weems had been happy to publicize Bushart’s arrest at first. In the earliest news story on September 22, local radio station WOPC published Bushart’s mugshot along with a statement from the sheriff, who said that Bushart’s meme had alluded to “a hypothetical shooting at a place called Perry High School.” According to Weems, “That message caused considerable concern within the community and we were asked to investigate.” Readers found this perplexing. “I’m confused,” one woman wrote on Facebook after the story was posted on the station page. “He was talking about shooting up the school or shooting up a vigil. How are the two things connected?” Another reader speculated that Weems hadn’t heard of the Iowa shooting and misinterpreted the post as a threat. “A man is in jail because the sheriff didn’t use google.” In a comment that has since been deleted, Weems personally replied to correct the record. “We were very much aware of the meme being from an Iowa shooting,” he wrote later that afternoon. The meme “created mass hysteria to parents and teachers … that led the normal person to conclude that he was talking about our Perry County High School.”
Young Thug defends James Harden for wearing a pro-police facemask: "He don't have internet"
wint @dril Hello Alan this is your lawer speaking. I am advising you today to please keep posting this shit
child touching a hot stove
Who can come and place his finger on one pledge I ever violated, or one principle I ever proved false to? CROWD MEMBER: "How about New Orleans?" ANOTHER CROWD MEMBER: "Hang Jeff. Davis, Hang Jeff-. Davis. Why don't you hang him?" CROWD: [Cries...] "Give us the opportunity." Have you not got the court? Have you not the Attorney General?' CROWD MEMBER: "Who is your Chief Justice, who has refused to sit upon the trial?" [Cheers.] THE PRESIDENT: I am not the Chief Justice. I am not the prosecuting attorney. [Cheers.] I am not the jury. I will tell you what I did do. I called upon your Congress that is trying to break up the government. CROWD: [Cries of...] "you be d—d" [and cheers mingled with hisses, and great confusion.] CROWD MEMBER: "Don't get mad Andy." THE PRESIDENT: Well, I will tell you who is mad—"Whom the Gods wish to destroy they first make mad." Did your Congress order any of them to be tried?' CROWD: "Three cheers for Congress!"
“The frustration is overwhelming,” the American Soybean Association (ASA) president Caleb Ragland said in a statement last week. “U.S. soybean prices are falling, harvest is underway, and farmers read headlines not about securing a trade agreement with China, but that the U.S. government is extending [$20 billion] in economic support to Argentina while that country drops its soybean export taxes to sell 20 shiploads of Argentine soybeans to China in just two days.”
David Brooks appearing on a Milton Friedman tv show with the chryon "social democrat"
Border Patrol agents detain members of a family at Millennium Park Sunday, Sept. 28, 2025. Credit: Provided Lindsay Rich witnessed a family of four stopped by the federal agents in Millennium Park Sunday. All four family members — a man, woman, young girl and toddler — were detained and taken away in a white van by the agents, she said. The young girl in the family was crying and was seen holding a doll, Rich said. The incident was caught on video and shared on social media.
video of Elon Musk at CPAC saying the left wants to make comedy illegal, legalize comedy
Speaking to The Times, Mikhail Khodorkovsky, the exiled former oligarch and Putin critic, said he had no problem with Trump’s wider immigration crackdown. But he urged the White House to reconsider its approach to Russians at risk of political persecution.
Charlie Kirk's alleged shooter scrawled political messages on the equipment brought to the murder scene ... expressing support for the transgender community while making antifascist remarks. Erroneous report from TMZ: A bulletin -- posted online by conservative commentator Steven Crowder -- was sent around to agents in the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. We've confirmed the authenticity of the bulletin with our federal law enforcement sources.
elon musk tweaking at CPAC saying "so, the left wants to make comedy illegal. It's like...legalize comedy!" followed by scattered applause
Pinochet himself was never prosecuted for the Prats assassination, nor for the other acts of terrorism he ordered. After he died on December 10, 2006—ironically, international Human Rights Day—the Chilean military arranged for his open coffin to be viewed by his admirers. Francisco Cuadrado Prats, the grandson of Carlos and Sofía Prats, stood in the viewing line with hundreds of Pinochetistas; when he reached the coffin, he spat on the glass covering Pinochet’s face. “It was a spontaneous act to spit on him out of revulsion,” the young Prats recalled after he was beaten by Pinochet supporters and then arrested for his sacrilegious conduct, “because he had my grandparents murdered.”
In the summer, after Fillmore's return, small Whig state conventions also assembled in Virginia, New York, Maine, and Massachusetts. In northern states like Massachusetts and Rhode Island, where a semblance of Whig organization still existed, the purpose of these avowals was "to keep the Whig party from falling into the Fremont current." In the South, where few Whig candidates had been run in 1855 and conversions to the Democrats were soaring in 1856, Whigs insisted "the Whig party [must] be reorganized" to "preserve unimpaired their distinct political character amid the many conflicting organizations by which they are surrounded and sought to be absorbed."' For admirers of the Whig party, including this historian, these poignant manifestos make for painful reading. They portray the pitiable condition to which the party had been reduced, predict the most pernicious consequences of its demise, and punctuate Whigs' seemingly endless capacity for self-delusion, their pathetic propensity to cling to pie-in-the-sky fantasies in the face of unwelcome realities. One is reminded, indeed, of Granger's cutting remark about the "out of place" Websterites at the 1852 Whig convention who waited "for the sky to fall so that they might catch larks."
Lorenz: "Actually, studies show the earlier a kid gets a smartphone the better the mental health. The idea that smartphones are ruining kids mental health is pseudoscience pushed by reactionaries who are using a moral panic to push dangerous censorship and surveillance laws"
2004: Awarded by independent, non-NCAA-recognized selector(s) Selector(s) who listed Auburn as national championship: Darryl Perry; GBE College Football Ratings
collection of right-wing twitter avatars of middle-aged people in their cars while wearing huge sunglasses
yes dad alod hir now
no dad alod hir now i do not lick him!!! do you lick him?
Stimulate every Whig to turn out Whig leaders had good reason to fear that northern antislavery Whigs would defect. Outrage at Taylor's nomination and at Southerners' apparent control of the convention was intense. Discontent erupted immediately in Maine, Vermont, New York, Indiana, Michigan, and elsewhere, but it centered in Ohio and Massachusetts, largely because certain Whig editors and officeholders fomented and organized it. "Stunned Stupified outraged abased Mortified and enraged to the last degree of endurance" by Taylor's nomination, Albert G. Riddle, a Whig state legislator from Ohio
screenshot of a book: In 1845, a Mississippi Whig moaned in despair, "we have no hope as a party in this state--you know we are in the Egyptian darkness of Locofocoism,"
facebook page called "anarcho-accelerationist memes for egoist teens" posting an image of Rangers FC fans doing a card display of Ranger coach Graeme Souness holding a shotgun with "take aim against the rebel scum". The facebook account replies "the ambiguity of who gets the wall"
billboard for former dolton mayor Tiffany Henyard reading "recall null and void. I am and forever will be Dolton's mayor. No weapon forged against you shall prosper"
regiment named Them Indiana Boys on an Indiana Night
Dumbass dogshit stupid Newsweek headline reading Donald Trump's approval rating is actually rising with democrats
guitar tablature for Louis Collins by Mississippi John Hurt. There's a difficult slide 2 frets and return to C with the pinky and bass that happens really quick
the book "Business Secrets of the Pharaohs"