Chat Clussman

@clussman.com

390 Followers 230 Following

Principal & Creative Director @ Ashandelle.com, shitposter, void yeller. I talk about design, running an agency, art, writing, woodworking, poker, and too much politics.

Screenshot of my iPhone notifications that screamed alarms at me all night long warning me of the “Imminent Threat Alert” of flooding should I happen to be out driving and not, in fact, trying to sleep.
A mockup of a 100 bill labeled a "Federal Victory Note". It's poorly photoshopped and features Trump's mugshot on the front. Ironically, this was posted by Trump himself.
Photo of the evidence: A sad, empty, cylindrical bird feeder hangs over an oak tree branch.
A screenshot of UnitedHealth Group Inc's financials from Google search showing that the stock, at the time of the screenshot, was down 17% to $314 a share. It also shows that revenue was up, net income was up, earnings per share was up, net profit margin was up, operating income was up, change in cash was up, and... revenue and earnings per share missed Wall Street estimates by 1.82% and 1.28% respectively.
Brandon Routh as Superman in 2006's Superman Returns. He's falling from the sky in the crucifixion pose as his red cape flutters around him.
A small, gray, exterior facade of what looks like a closed down shop. Windows are covered. The exterior ground is just bare concrete. The building is sandwiched between two other, larger buildings with no alleys or space between.
My dog wolf, a yellow shepherd and husky mix, howling with a mixture of concern and hope. He’s surrounded by his playgroup, other medium sized, “high energy” dogs, at doggie daycare. There’s artificial turf, real trees, and, one assumes, treats and a human somewhere just off camera.
Two contrarian bots in the comments arguing that a backbone doesn’t make a good leader.
A medium sized dog demanding that I scratch him while he has his back turned to me. He is at once upset with me and needs to know I love him at least as much as the cats. The shade is making him look reddish but he’s a yellow-white dog with a Husky coat and German Shepherd ears. He is, of course, yowling for attention.
A beautiful brown and black striped tabby with white chest and paws sits in a doorway staring indignantly at the camera man. He’s sitting on faux wood tile. A black shoulder bag sits on the floor behind him. Out of focus (thankfully) in the background is a couch and coffee table.
A screenshot of Tesla's stock valuation over the last five days as it's lost $68.51/share, bringing it down to $293.26 (as of the time of the screenshot). It's just a jagged red line trending down.
Can any woman in the comments imagine writing a post about the size of a man’s penis and comparing it to marketing? And what would happen to us if we did? If this guy was going for clicks, he wins. But, as with many things, it’s not the size of your LinkedIn audience, it’s what you do with it. Jose replies: please do this lol
Let’s talk boobs for a sec… 👀 Are they any less valuable if they are attractively presented? 🤔 So my theory is: The larger they are, the more they tend to be covered up. The smaller they are, the more they tend to be “on show”. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule. But it’s got me thinking, the more confidence we have in whatever we’re presenting (boobs or otherwise) the less we tend to shout about it. We might even try to hide our natural “gifts” 🎈🎈😁 Same with words. There are a lot of people in marketing working with A cup ideas and using verbal pushup bras to attract eyeballs, prospects and sales. But there are a quiet minority in turtle necks and big coats packing FF concepts and offers. So if you’re getting annoyed with the people constantly shoving their stuff in your face - know that you’re not alone.
A screenshot showing the definitions of the word gamble: 1) Play games of chance for money; bet. 2) Take risky action in the hope of a desired result. Noun: an act of gambling; an enterprise undertaken or attempted with a risk of loss and a chance of profit or success.
Two stoned cats, one black, one brown, sitting 10 feet apart both staring into space.
Screenshot from my followers list showing an account called "The great Illuminati brotherhood".
A yellow grocery sign reading 'Ass. cream cake $3.69'.
A picture of Whistlepig's 10 year rye whiskey bottle on a white background. The bottle is shaped like a typical maple syrup bottle. (Whistlepig's mash was originally sourced from Canada.) The whiskey has a honey color to it.
Dog excitedly splashing in the pool with a happy-slash-goody expression on its face.
I tried to sweep a Texas red-headed centipede off our driveway because it kept trying to get into the garage and it decided to come for me instead. Picture shows it climbing up the broom bristles toward the handle. It’s about 10” long.
Me raising a sword while riding on a rearing unicorn. An archer is riding backwards behind me, knocking a flaming arrrow to her bow. The background is pink and there is a thick layer of fog on the ground.
Franklin Leonard: Weird how all of the pro meritocracy people are quiet about the prospect of Attorney General Matt Gaetz. zane: DUI hire
The iOS top apps list showing Bluesky at #3.
A troglodytic person holding two signs. One reads “Homo sex is sin.” The second reads: “Types of property: women, slaves, animals, cars, land, etc…”
Screenshot of my Wordle showing a 762 day streak
From the last tasting: an almost empty rocks glass on an orange side table. There's a finger's worth of brown liquid left at the bottom of the glass.
Me, a 50yo silver haired guy, doing a bad Vanna White impression as I show off a poker trophy I just won. I’m wearing a tan tshirt and a teal hoodie and I look very mindful, very demure.
Irish coffee in a copper mug
A pair of MPOW headphones with actual, non-Halloween cobwebs.
Collage showing an autonomous bus, car, and robots from the movie I, Robot on the left and the autonomous bus, car, and robots that Musk just unveiled and, boy, let me tell you, they are remarkably similar. From the giant toaster look of the bus to the winged doors and covered wheels of the car to the appearance of humanoid robots, they are REMARKABLY similar. Image was taken from @dustdust213 on Twitter.
She (Melania) described Trump as a “family man” When asked what she wishes people knew about her husband, Melania replied, “That he is really a family man. He loves his family. He loves this country and all he wants is to build better and prosperous.” That point really has been lost amid the tabloid coverage of Trump’s extramarital affair in the ’90s, the 20-plus sexual-misconduct allegations against him, the conviction over hush-money payments to a porn star, and Trump being found liable for sexually assaulting E. Jean Carroll.
Text exchange with my wife. Me: Teo copperheads are mating on the other side of our fence My wife: What?! Which side? Stop them!!! I don't want baby snakes so close Me: They moved like 2 feet and I lost them Side of the house. I spotted them from the deck. Wolf could hear them and wanted to go play. My wife: I want to move. To the city.
The scene from the movie A Clockwork Orange where a man has his eyes held open by hardware strapped to his head for forced re-education. The man is screaming and his eyes are bloodshot. I haven't watched the movie in a long time but I hope it holds up.
A picture of my shepsky, Wolf, standing upright on our deck, surveying his lands.
Aces full versus a straight flush. All the money went in.
Thinking back over the past year, what is your perception of Adobe’s GenAI efforts overall? Response: Done without consent or discussion with your customers, trained on your customers’ data, AI stock commingled and derivative of your customers’ own work product, often non-editable so there is no human control or expression involved, and almost always not as good as what humans are capable of creating. What else do you want Adobe to know about GenAI (optional)? Response: I’m glad the Figma merger was blocked. Your company needs to be broken up by antitrust.
Wolf amidst a trio of other medium sized dogs, yowling his heart out, which is a thing he does when he’s excited (he’s a Shepsky—half shepherd, half husky mix).
Elon Musk responding to quote text from an AI researcher saying “I dislike the long dash parenthetical - should be a medium-sized dash with a space on either side imo”. Bitch doesn’t even know what an em-dash is.
Screenshot showing brass hardware, bookshelves, and a white, mod desk.
NBC News headline reads “Israel recovers bodies of three killed by Hamas on October 7 and held hostage in Gaza”
Picture of the original post with 69 likes
A yellow Shepsky, sitting like the goodest boy, hoping for a treat
Yellow Shepsky (shepherd-Husky mix) sitting attentively like the goodest boy he needs to be to get some of the chicken I’m eating.
Picture of a yellow Shepsky (shepherd/husky mix) howling
Picture of Anger from Pixar’s Inside Out with his head on fire.
A post from Billboard Charts showing Taylor Swift holding all top 14 spots on their Hot100 list.
Elon Musk tweeted “The axiomatic error undermining much of Western Civilization is “weak makes right”. If someone accepts, explicitly or implicitly, that the oppressed are always the good guys, then the natural conclusion is that the strong are the bad guys.”
A screenshot of Adobe Illustrator's File Handling options showing an autosave to cloud option and no autosave for desktop.
Scene from Game of Thrones. Arya Stark says “He’s still got it, my sword, Needle.” The Hound replies “Needle, of course you’d name your sword.” “Lots of people name their swords.” “Lots of cunts.”
Leonardo DiCaprio in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. He's sitting in an old recliner, drinking a beer. He responds to something on TV by sitting up and resoundingly saying 'Yes!'
Black and white picture of a man wearing a ridiculous helmet with little eye lenses and nose hole. It looks like the top of a missile was repurposed. The caption reads: “The author at work in his private study aided by the Isolator. Outside noises being eliminated, the worker can concentrate with ease upon the subject at hand.”
A screenshot of the Fast Company article with ads and popups going both over and under the text of the article making it impossible to read.
A shaded pencil sketch of the fictitious Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, a round grenade topped by an Iron Cross.
Silly pic with Bigfoot on the left and Travis Kelce walking on a beach with Taylor Swift. Travis's pose is reminiscent of Bigfoot's, prompting me to CONNECT THE DOTS.