Curator Rob

@curatorrob.bsky.social

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Museums, Archaeology, Romans, Corduroy All views are my wife's #SundayHuxley

An overhead photo of an archaeological skeleton laying in its grave. Oddly it appears to have two sternums, four humeri and way too many ribs and vertebrae. It's a glitch created when multiple photos of the skeleton were digitally stitched together.
An overhead photo of a roman mortar floor. cut into middle of the floor is a grave with a skeleton in it. to the left is an information board and in the bottom right, ringed with a drawn red circle, is an area where archaeologists have cut through the floor to expose lower levels
The profile of a simply gorgeous golden retriever laying on some grass with his paws apart and facing to the right. his tongue is poking out just a tiny bit. It's enough to make your heart melt.
A Roman mosaic. An outer border with a yellow and black wave pattern is edged on the inside with a red and white zigzag pattern. The central image is a semi-naked man, worse the wear from drink, being helped on his way by a much shorter person.
An unspeakably handsome golden retriever's head, in profile and looking to the right. He is kissed with strong summer sunlight. Attached to his lips are several small pieces of gravel.
A stack of smart-looking lidded cardboard boxes (5 boxes high and 4 boxes wide). They are variously marked, in pencil, "dust, floor 19. Dust, floor 20 etcetera.
A bowl of hummus, viewed from above, the drizzle of olive oil so often found on such things bears the most fleeting resemblance to the Strait of Hormuz.
A roman mosaic in a naïve style, showing a round border containing a character in the lower left portion with a fish's tail instead of legs and the main figure is a seemingly unclothed woman. She appears to be tossing a ball in the air and behind her is what could equally be a hand mirror or a tennis racket.
An unspeakably handsome golden retriever sitting on front of a striped deckchair looking handsome and handsomely wearing a pink hollyhock flower on his handsome head as if it were a hat.
A roman Mosaic. on a white background surrounded by a black border is a long-legged stork approaching a squiggly snake with one of its legs extended forward (the stork, not the snake).
A vintage image of a woman sitting on a red, black and white Roman mosaic with a pronounced twisted "guilloche" motif. She is holding in one hand a large square metal can, and in the other painting the mosaic with the contents of the can. I suspect this is not water...
Someone's hands (close up) holding a highly decorated helmet made in they style of the famous Anglo-Saxon helmet from Sutton Hoo, but it has multiple feline features such as it's small size, cat-like nose and cat's ears. It's a modern item.
It's the world famous Fishbourne Roman Palace hypocaust and someone has clumsily photoshopped an image of that mannequin, "Annie" from The Blue Anchor station. That's the same mannequin who was recently stolen and found riding a train with a can of cider in her hand.
A snip from a post on a metal detecting artefact identification page. The poster winders what an object is, The image of the post is a hand holding a round gold-coloured metal object with a screw hole top and bottom and the letters FRP emblazoned across it. For reference, FRP could stand for "Fishbourne Roman Palace", but in this case it probably doesn't.
A pair of dark brown army boots. Oh my God are the toes shiny. You can literally see your face in them. Oh, and top right there's a tennis ball.
A photo of a front room. Light is shining through the closed curtains, but the photo is grainy as light levels are low. There is a chair and you can see the corner of a table, on the left. On the right is a sofa with an ancient golden retriever laying on it. In the centre of the room, cocooned in a sleeping bag and laying on a dog bed is a sleeping human.
Its a screen snip from a tweet. The image is that meme of a man looking awkward. The text reads "We would like to apologize. Thanks to autocorrect not knowing the word 'wellies', we just invited the people of sussex to 'pull on your willies'. We are deeply sorry".
There's a lot going on in this black and white roman mosaic. figures are standing around at different orientations. There is a table in the centre with assorted mystery objects on and around it (sorry- I have no idea what they are so can't be more informative). Crucially, near, but slightly lower and to the right of, the centre is what can only be described as a football.
A superb pencil drawing of two tiny Roman engraved gem stones. The top one shows a raven, facing left. The lower one is a horse, also facing left.
A black and white photo of the head of a sculpture of a boy. The head has been broken and the area above his nose and his left eye is missing
A handwritten letter in blue ink. It asserts the use of the word "Palace" when describing Fishbourne Roman Palace is inapropriate because "even the Golden House of Nero was described as a domus . The author shows no indication that he has clearly chosen the wrong man to mess with.
It's a typed letter from Barry Cunliffe. Forgive me for paraphrasing, but it's explaining to someone that the use of the word "Palace" when describing Fishbourne Roman Palace is justifiable on grounds of the size of the building. The tone is slightly world weary.
Okay, Buckle up. It's "Roman" mosaic of a completely naked Pygmy with everything on display, who is wrestling with a crane. There is some text in the mosaic which may be in greek and is presumably some kind of trigger warning. It's possible that the mosaic is a modern fake, but the overall impact is nonetheless undiminished.
A very handsome golden retriever laying at the top of a flight of stairs on his side. His face is all squishy and draped over his paws is a brown sock.
Against a textured black background are five tiny fragments of animal teeth. In case you were in any doubt as to their tininess, to the left is a pencil tip, which appears pretty big in comparison.
It's a screen snip of a tweet. Someone has posted a pic of a stone carving of a woman on which the hair has been photoshopped to be blond. Above is a post from the Roman Palace comparing that image with one of Joanna Lumley from Absolutely Fabulous and the two are absolutely identical. Kinda.
A greatly loved senior golden retriever. The view is his head turned towards the cameral while he rests his chin on his own arms as he lays on some grass. in the background is a wall and the hint of some forget me nots.
A generously bearded man who has clearly been working out, wearing a white t shirt with the slogan "It's 1600 years since the romans left Dorchester. We've got 5 metres of archaeology; 6 weeks to dig it. It's dark and we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it!". The design is titled "The Antefix Brothers" and shows two roman antifixes wearing dark glasses and hats in the style of The Blues Brothers, from which the slogan is adapted.
You're not going to believe this. A chair is placed on a Roman mosaic. A man stands on the chair and leans forward for an overhead photo. He leans so far that another young man has to hold him up with a broom pressed into the photographer's chest. A young woman is holding on to the chair to stop the entire mess toppling over and ending in tears.
It's the Cerne Abbas Giant - a chalk figure form dorset depicting a naked man with a club in his hand (on the left) and, notable, a huge erect penis. Or is it?! Could his ribs be whiskers and his nipples be a cat's eyes while the so-called penis is a finger pressed against the cat's lips. It could. Especially if you've been drinking.
An idiot with a massive comedy beard standing in front of a blue background and wearing what can only be described as a prawn hat.
A well dressed sophisticated looking woman standing in front of a sign for the Institute of Archaeology. From the right a ridiculous character with a bald head and comedy beard is executing the Mother of all photobombs.
A big black leather-bound book with the title, "Natural History Museum. Contract specification schedule 1873"