dng

@dng.bsky.social

1210 Followers 1270 Following

i make things occasionally https://accumulationofthings.com

A picture of whatever stadium in LA it is they're playing world cup matches at
A 32 page catalogue for purchasing various absolutely shite household items
Roy Orbital Anointed as Emoticorp’s official Mood Of The Year seventeen years running, Roy Orbital is able to trace his decillionaire lineage all the way back to some originating 20th century myth-shrouded millionaire. Though Roy’s authenticity is unquestioned, the true nature of his undoubtedly impassioned soul remains contested. Described by accepted and condoned critical analysis as alternately unfathomable, inexplicable and insoluble, Roy Orbital is the paradoxical conundrum of the decillionaire caste, his evergreen image of affected alienation simultaneously popular with screaming teenagers desperate to be misunderstood and wistful decrepitudes yearning for the nostalgic pleasures of misremembered old times. Age: 52 Style: Timeless Voice: Tremulous Reputation: Enigmatic Personality: Brooding Emotional Depth: Abyssal Glasses: Extremely Dark Mass: 63 kg Height: 1.80 metres Personal Wealth: €4,444,444,444,444,444,444,444,444,444,444,444 (4th on all time list)
Rex Detroit Recreational Detroit, born Simon Jones, and commonly known as Rex, is 47 years of age, and the newest and tallest of the world’s eight known decillionaires. Father of fifteen, father at fifteen, winner of World’s Fastest Executive Firing three times in the last seven years, proud owner of the entire remaining edible population of Chilean flamingos. His murder convictions were recently annulled on appeal, due to the bankruptcy of the Calizona Criminal Justice Department mid-trial. Although it has long been rumoured that Rex Detroit is scared of heights, any such public suggestion of these facts is prosecuted to the full extent of the prevailing jurisdiction’s civil, criminal and corporate protectionist laws. Age: 47 Wives: 4 (plus 2 divorced, 1 deceased) Children (paternity accepted): 15 Children (paternity contested): 21 Mass (Earth standard): 81 kg Height (Actual): 1.94 metres Height (Official): 2.01 metres Likeability (public ratings by verified accounts): 9.9/10 Likeability (unpublished internal ratings by anonymous polling of known associates and employees): 0.9/10 Murders (completed): 9 Murders (convicted): 0 Personal Wealth: €1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,001 (8th on all time list)
A hedgehog in the plants in the corner of my garden
Selection It was my turn as Prime Minister this week. I was woken up by the whips and given the ceremonial hi-viz and hard hat then driven straight to Downing Street to give a speech to the assorted Westminster hacks. I said some nonsense about being here to serve all the people all the time before adding “All the real people!” with a cheeky wink to the guy from GB News. His thumbs up meant the world to me. Once I got inside I turned the heating right up, left all the taps running and ate every Viennetta in the freezer. “Bill that to the taxpayer!” I chuckled to some weary civil servant As I put the hard hat on his head, handed him the hi-viz jacket and went next door to see who the chancellor was.
A three panel comic about a cat. In the middle panel the cat calls you a wanker
A swan looks at an old lady and says TWEET
The bride ascends some stairs in her wedding dress in The Mistletoe Bough
The Black Cat The black cat is the only ghost with measurable weight Once it settles in place it cannot be moved While it sleeps it feasts on our dreams And we let it we let it
The cover of a Murder On The Orient Express game on the PS4. Poirot is quite aggressively sexy.
a hamster so long bluesky only wants to show about a tenth of it
a cartoon dog's head
A photo of a game of Long Dog in action. There is a very long dog, a quite long pig, a sot of long hamster, and a pretty tall cat
Her grief was matched only by her capacity for self-restraint
a picture of a scotch egg, labelled ova scotia
Bronto Time
Panel 1: Nietzsche looked into the whole Panel 2: And the hole looked back Panel 3: And kept looking back Panel 4: Until Nietzsche looked away Panel 5: And walked all the way home Panel 6: In the rain
if i was a cube I'd keep my secrets on the sides you cannot see (written on the three visible sides of a cube)
An animated gif showing a few hundred photos in less than a minute)
The kite, again, and two of my nieces
a kite with a picture of a robot on it, flying in some blue suburban skies
Some weird growth on a tree that looks like one of those terrifying brainscream things from Bloodborne
A sign on a window saying "Please do not feel the birds. Thank you." (in John Lewis, in Exeter)
the sun, some cloud, the sky, the sea and a ship on the horizon that looks strangely churchlike in silhouette
the sunset about to set
a silver sea, a golden sky
a crow
Grandfather Every tick and every tock reveals its enmity and its spite
Poor Thing It's more frightened of you than you are of whatever it is
The Living Mask Centuries of stoicism betrayed by the rust of its tears
The Magician All hat and no face The magician revels in his role
Insomnia She sleeps on the ceiling entirely oblivious to the fact you're not sleeping below
Judgement Always alone he stands and he stares We yearn to be free of the gaze of the past
Coven In the woods the witches wait They'll have their revenge however long it takes
Ex Machina For centuries ghosts lurked in every machine photographs phonographs radio transmissions telegraph wires tv signals cassette tapes holograms x-rays videos But no one ever worried about a haunted smartphone despite our every attempt to animate them with artificial life So we pretend the lifeless voices and the undying minds we've stretched over skeletal structures built from the moans of the dead aren't uncanny at all But natural assistance necessary extensions to the mortal limits of our souls
Atrophy On the wall the skull still dreams Don't mistake its silence for an acceptance of its fate
A History Of Haunted Transport ghost ships ghost trains ghost trams ghost cars ghost planes ghost helicopters ghost motorbikes ghost bmxes ghost scooters ghost skateboards ghost sleds ghost segways ghost wheelchairs ghost hang gliders ghost hot air balloons ghost submarines ghost tractors ghost trailers ghost combine harvesters ghost elevators ghost escalators ghost travelators ghost rollercoasters ghost dodgems ghost ferris wheels ghost monorails ghost cable cars ghost funiculars ghost rockets ghost space shuttles ghost space stations ghost teleportation chambers (pending)
22. Home Tethered in place to the precise location of his demise the ghost watches the earth as it slowly recedes from view He'll miss it when it's gone even though he hated it when he was there
Text: Radio Static (formerly Hiss FM) Image: A drawing of a transistor radio that plays nothing but static
The moon was a planet once Alive now dead A cold reflection of our own
A picture of a branston pickle egg, followed by a post saying its already sold old.
Reflection Three ghosts in every mirror the past the present the days soon to come
Echolocation Poltergeists as memorials to frustrated fury Plates rebroken, books rethrown in still empty rooms after long forgotten fights
With And Without Smoke the ghost of flames
Mist Ghosts live in every cloud but only in the fog do they ever get close enough to see us for certain
Lurk What better place to hide than among the washing on the line
Skull We finally see the depths of their souls in the absence of their eyes
Guilt And Guillotine Heedless in life headless in death
Mass The abandoned the betrayed They don't need words to make themselves understood Their silent stares are recrimination enough
Chalk Figures On Distant Hillsides Footprints and scuff marks on nearby paths. The possibility of fingerprints on gates fences knives All other traces wiped clean from the scene of the crime
Restless, Nameless History negates the need for the remembered to remain It is the forgotten who still stir
Cecilia The roots of trees grow through her grave The wind in the leaves blows through her hair The fruit from the boughs runs red with her blood Eat me. Drink me
The Ghosts Of Summer Beneath the football fields and the cricket greens Drought draws out emergent lines of ungrowing grass Echoes of buried brick and stone from ages long past
Memoriam Not even the boatman knows his past
The Twins Rot and decay bring with them irrefutable proofs of life Cleanliness and purity bring only the endless desert of death