Dylan Morrison

@dylanthyme.bsky.social

649 Followers 325 Following

Queer romcom author, snack connoisseur, Terry Pratchett enthusiast. Proudly trans and sheepishly neurotic. RECIPE FOR TROUBLE, FALL INTO YOU and SECOND HELPINGS out now! Preorder COMFORT READ, out this October: https://geni.us/1579-al-aut-ch

The cover of Second Helpings, which features two men in front of a menu board. One man is sitting at a table and the other is standing holding a tray with condiments. The book is set against a backdrop of tomatoes and next to the words OUT NOW.
A brief audio clip from the SECOND HELPINGS audiobook, shown with a screenshot of the audiobook and in-video captions.
A photo of Second Helpings next to a wrapped sandwich. The cover features two men in front of a menu board, one sitting at a table, the other wearing an apron and holding a tray with condiments on it.
The cover for COMFORT READ by Dylan Morrison against an illustrated backdrop of stacked books. The cover depicts two men in bookshop, one passing another a book from atop a ladder that's leaning against the shelves. A large orange cat stands at the feet of the man on the ground.
A gif of (one of) the closing scenes of Clue, where Michael McKean's Mr. Green is saying "I'm gonna go home and have sex with my wife!" Please note: this post runs on the theory that this ending of Clue is presenting the truth of McKean's character. If we were discussing the version of Mr. Green otherwise portrayed by 1985's Clue, I would be comparing him to Achilles, not Odysseus. Thank you for your time
The cover of my next book, SECOND HELPINGS, against a yellow background printed with tomatoes. The cover is purple and features one man sitting at a table gazing up at another man wearing an apron and holding a serving tray.
That old heavily memed tweet that reads "My neighbor told me coyotes keep eating his outdoor cats so I asked how many cats he has and he said he just goes to shelter and gets a new cat afterwards so I said it sounds like he's just feeding shelter cats to coyotes and then his daughter started crying," except I've very poorly edited it so it reads, "Master Kohga told me the hero of legend keep thrashing the yiga clan's asses so I asked how many yiga he has and he said he just goes to the depths and gets a new one afterwards so I said it sounds like he's just feeding the yiga clan to Link and then his henchman started crying"
Sam makes toast, which he burns, & then, figuring he has the time to do better & he might as well use it, makes pancakes instead. He burns those too, his attention so consistently drawn to staring out his window at Jake’s building that he keeps missing his opportunity to flip them. In the end he eats the two that are least charred &, after a particularly unpleasant bite, attempts to wash it down with the power of coffee. The coffee, too, is burnt. It’s still only 4:37AM. Sam despairs briefly of being alive. He decides, in the circumstances, that he has no choice but to go and get Pastrami. Pastrami plays a variety of roles in Sam’s life; it is, of course, a meat available for purchase at the deli, & one about which, if he happens not to have it in stock, a few specific people will get really annoying. But Pastrami is also the name of Sam's dog, chosen because, when she was a puppy, she’d looked as though she planned to grow into a small to medium-sized white dog, with a thick coating of black speckles. When Sam found her digging around in the trash behind the deli four years ago, she’d been skin & bones, barely a few months old, & the speckles had reminded him of the pepper on the outside of a piece of pastrami. The name had stuck, even though Pastrami herself had seemingly decided, in the end, that she was not interested in being a white dog with black speckles, or indeed in being either small or medium sized. She had, instead, grown up to be quite a surprisingly large black dog with white speckles, & long, slightly floofy fur, & one ear that was constantly flopping over her eye while the other stood ramrod straight. Her veterinarian, after some thoughtful consideration, had filled in the section of her file marked ‘Breed’ with eight question marks. Sam had not intended on getting a pet of any kind, let alone one so big that she took up half the couch he once promised Deb he’d never let her sit on, but. She was a good dog, that was all. And she’d needed his help.
A gif of Ron Swanson (played by Nick Offerman) in Parks & Rec. He's in a hardware store telling an employee, "I know more than you."
The "I've had enough of this dude" meme from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia (Mac, Dennis and Charlie staring at a painting they're approaching to remove from the way, saying "I've had enough of this dude") with the current weather forecast laid over the image inside the picture frame. Said forecast predicts temperatures of 3, 0, 1, and 3 degrees Fahrenheit.
Bob the dog, a brown and black brindle English Mastiff with chops that have gone white because he's an old man these days 😭 He is in his favorite position: doing an imitation of a slug
Memed version of the scene in Parks & Rec where Jean-Ralphio sings "R to O to N and Swanson's got the swagger the size of Big Ben... clock," because he habitually cannot figure out the appropriate place to end the rhyme
The illustrated panel of a Spiderman comic featuring J Jonah Jameson smoking a cigar pounded on his desk, made famous as a meme
bertolt brecht's "All Of Us Or None," a poem originally published in "Poetry: A Magazine of Verse" in 1945. It reads, in its entirety: "Slave, who is it that shall free you? Those in deepest darkness lying. Comrade, only these can see you Only they can hear you crying. Comrade, only slaves can free you. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. One alone his lot can’t better. Either gun or fetter. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. You who hunger, who shall feed you? If it’s bread you would be carving, Come to us, we too are starving. Come to us and let us lead you. Only hungry men can feed you. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. One alone his lot can’t better. Either gun or fetter. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. Beaten man, who shall avenge you? You, on whom the blows are falling, Hear your wounded brothers calling. Weakness gives us strength to lend you. Come to us, we shall avenge you. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. One alone his lot can’t better. Either gun or fetter. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. Who, oh wretched one, shall dare it? He who can no longer bear it. Counts the blows that arm his spirit. Taught the time by need and sorrow, Strikes today and not tomorrow. Everything or nothing. All of us or none. One alone his lot can’t better. Either gun or fetter. Everything or nothing. All of us or none."
Gif of Tim Robinson saying "I didn't do fucking shit!"
Image of a tweet from user Art Decider 2/@boring_as_heck. It reads: "[mysterious old lady flips tarot card revealing a dude who looks exactly like me flying a hot air balloon into power lines] Me: is that good"
A gif of a scene from Fantastic Mr. Fox. An animated fox in human clothes says, "If what I think is happening, is happening... it better not be."
NICK: hey cece, can you take that beans in the trap song off the bar playlist? i don't like the way it makes bearclaw dance. CECE: sure, i'll -- hold on. did you say beans? NICK: yeah. beans in the trap. SCHMIDT: bees. NICK: what? SCHMIDT: BEES. NICK: where? SCHMIDT: in the song! it's not beans! it's bees. NICK, LAUGHING: what?! do you even hear yourself? why would bees be in a trap? SCHMIDT, GROWING ENRAGED: why would BEANS be in a trap?! when have you ever heard of a bean in a trap?! NICK: see, now you're just telling me you don't know anything about farming-- SCHMIDT: farming?!? nicholas! she puts the BEES in the TRAP! it's beekeeping if it's anything-- CECE, TAKING A HUGE BREATH BEFORE SIGHING AND SHAKING HER HEAD: you know what? it's not worth it
An image of an eBook with the Second Helpings cover on it, next to a wrapped sandwich. The Second Helpings cover is an illustration set against a periwinkle background, which shows a man with light brown hair sitting at a table, a cane hooked over the back of his chair, and another man with darker hair and wearing an apron holding a tray. Little yellow hearts appear around him, and a chalkboard reads "A queer m/m second chance romance."
A still from 'The Princess Diaries' featuring the character Mr. Robutussin. You know, the next door neighbor writer guy? With the weird trashcans? Always wearing a robe? Scribbling frenetically and unsettling his neighbors? The brother of my very soul, as it turns out
“The next several hours are, honestly, a bit grueling. Ben was expecting his frustration to mount as he watches Pete, but instead Ben finds what swells within him is sympathy. The man has simply got problems; now that Ben knows how Pete usually cooks, and without any cuts for him to hide in, it’s a lot harder to find it funny. Or, well. Okay. It is still… pretty funny. Ben feels guilty about it, but—there are moments, in spite of the strange knot of fellow feeling that seems to have sprouted in his chest since he last did this a week and a half ago, where he can’t help but let out a little laughter. Pete’s stupidly handsome face is so unusually expressive, for one thing, seeming to go rubbery with comical shock or dismay as he drops, spills, trips, and otherwise clatters his way around the kitchen he’d moved so easily in this morning. He’s making a Halloween cocktail and appetizer; the appetizer is a..." Excerpt From Recipe for Trouble Dylan Morrison
Kind, good, happy, gentlemanly, secure people never go Nazi. They may be the gentle philosopher whose name is in the Blue Book, or Bill from City College to whom democracy gave a chance to design airplanes—you’ll never make Nazis out of them. But the frustrated and humiliated intellectual, the rich and scared speculator, the spoiled son, the labor tyrant, the fellow who has achieved success by smelling out the wind of success—they would all go Nazi in a crisis. Believe me, nice people don’t go Nazi. Their race, color, creed, or social condition is not the criterion. It is something in them. Those who haven’t anything in them to tell them what they like and what they don’t—whether it is breeding, or happiness, or wisdom, or a code, however old-fashioned or however modern, go Nazi. It’s an amusing game. Try it at the next big party you go to.
“All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable." REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.
The original HIT DA BRICKS meme. Features a walking skeleton over the words "JUST WALK OUT. you can leave!!! work, social thing, movies, home, class, dentist, clothes shoppi, too fancy weed store, cops if your quick, friend ships. IF IT SUCKS... HIT DA BRICKS. real winners quit"
An ereader on top of a cutting board against a green checkered towel. The screen shows the cover of Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, which features two men cooking against a dark periwinkle background.
A 15 panel comic by artist Tom Gould. It shows a writer typing, thinking "Haha. This is funny." Over the next several panels they begin to experience doubt, thinking "Maybe not hilarious, but funny." And then, "It is sort of funny." And then, "It seemed funny when I thought of it." And then, "Maybe it's not funny." And then, "No, it IS funny." And then, "I'm really very sure it's funny." And then, "Definitely." In the last image we see of the writer, they are sitting pensively and saying nothing, obviously still unsure. In the final panel of the comic, however, we see the reader holding the book and saying simply, "Haha."
"The guy in the video—Pete—is handsome in that relaxed, unin‐ tentional way Ben associates with people who had a great time in high school. There’s something about him that’s almost familiar, and he looks older than Ben, in probably his early thirties. His dark wavy hair, faded tight on the sides and left longer on top, clearly just lies that way, in the sort of easy dishevelment no one can pull o$ when they’re trying. As if all that wasn’t enough, he’s broad shouldered and well muscled—not a full gym rat like Ben some‐ times pulls on Grindr, but de!nitely visibly toned. It’s a look Ben associates with rock climbers, although admittedly that may be situational bias, because he is also wearing the type of T-shirt-with- sleeves-cut-o$ Ben associates with rock climbers. However, the idiot has distinguished himself from the pack by electing to do this to a shirt with Ask Me About Canned Beans scrawled across the front in a gigantic, hideous font. And Pete is, above anything else, an idiot. Sure—he’s a little bit hot. Ben can admit that to himself, here in the safe anonymity of the New York City subway system, where anything could happen and does, every day. Pete is a little bit hot. That doesn’t make it okay that somehow, despite having presumably been a talented enough chef to land one of the coveted, cushy positions as a Gastronome test cook, he has produced what has to be the single worst collection of cooking footage ever created by man. “Hi!” Pete says, waving at the camera, in the !rst take. But he's"
COMING 16 OCTOBER 2025 [Image of blue book cover, Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, featuring two men cooking against a green backdrop with sparkles.]
A screenshot of a tweet from 7 Sep 2019 from user MALTSCHLITZMANN that reads "bro no bro don't make a gallant entrance by slicing down the mainsail with a dulled knife. bro we need that mainsail for sailing. bro you've becalmed us in the sargasso. bro i wish you had considered the ramifications of your actions ONCE bro. PLEASE."
Screenshot of a paragraph pulled from the linked article: "The implication here seems to be that Democrats can turn a big dial that says “transphobia” on it to some ideal level—that there’s a sweet spot of anti-trans discrimination that everyone can be content with. (Everyone, presumably, except trans people themselves.) But the events of the past year should have put that idea to rest. Democrats and centrists have been distancing themselves from trans people—indeed, top Democratic figures like Chuck Schumer will barely say the word “trans”—and the only forces that have benefited are the forces of anti-trans fascism. You can’t just play these kinds of games with people’s lives."
The Recipe For Trouble cover, which features two dark haired men cooking a pot of soup, displayed on an ebook next to two bowls of soup and the words PRE-ORDER NOW.
An open notebook page on which the words "Bats - cute but scary" are scrawled in the messy and borderline unreadable scrawl of the mostly asleep.
An image of a Kindle displaying the Fall Into You cover with granny smith apples and a green towel against the left hand side.
An image of the Fall Into You cover on an e-reader, against a backdrop of red, illustrated apples.
An image of the Fall Into You cover on a Kindle, with granny smith apples in the background.
A blue book cover with yellow font reading "FALL INTO YOU" and an illustration of the two main characters -- one blonde man in flannel, one dark-haired man in a sweater -- leaning against an apple tree.
One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking. -Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
"Fall Into You" temporary holding cover. It's text on an off white background, reading "Final Cover Coming Soon / Fall into You / Dylan Morrison."
A jar of homemade pickles. The jar itself is being repurposed and reads, "CREAM-NUT Smooth Natural Peanut Butter"
A green hat with the words “goblin mode” embroidered on it in yellow sits on a desk. In front of it is in front of a little camping lantern, which illuminates the hat in the dark room. Behind the hat and lantern you can see a small plastic avocado, a stack of books, some yarn and pens and other desk detritus.