Iain Hepburn

@iainhepburn.me

208 Followers 348 Following

Failed former award-winning journalist. https://linktr.ee/iainhepburn

My dad accidentally massively insulting former Thistle midfielder Gary Fraser when receiving his shirt…
Buckaroo Banzai and the Hong Kong Cavaliers
The concourse of Glasgow Central station.
My Lenovo Go S - basically a third party steam deck - playing Red Dead Redemption 2 on the train. On a fucking train, man. I had to buy a console specifically to play this during lockdown. Now you can play it will all bells and whistles on something only marginally bigger than a Game Gear.
Arthur Morgan talks to a nun. You know the bit I mean.
Screenshot of my career page on Football Manager 24. Partick Thistle and Manchester United legend lain Hepburn was born in Glasgow on 15th May 1978. He made two appearances for his country. During his tenure. Hepburn's team won the World Cup in 2042 and the European Football Championship in 2044 tis first venture into management was with Partick. Thistle where he was appointed in July 2023. During his tenure, Hepburn's team won the SPFL. Trust in 2024, the Wiliam Hill Championship in 2024, won the Willam Hill Scottish Premiership. three times in a row between 2027 and 2029, the Premier Sports Scottish League Cup three times in a row between 2026 and 2028 and the Scottish Cup four times in a row between 2026 and 2029. After leaving The Jags. Hepburn enjoyed an 11 year spell at Man Utd. During his tenure, Hepburn's team won the Club World Championship in 2037, the English Premier League ten times in a row between 2031 and 2040, won the English Community Shield ten times between 2030 and 2040, the Carabao Cup ten times between 2030 and 2040, the English FA Cup 11 times in a row between 2030 and 2040, the UEFA Super Cup seven times in a row and the UEFA Champions League eight times in a row between 2023 and 2040. Hepburn then moved on to become manager at Scotland. During his tenure, Hepburn's team won the European Championship in 2044 and the World Cup in 2042. Hepburn has been recognised for his talent and achievements with several awards: Won the cinch Championship Manager of the Season. Scottish Football Writers Manager of the Year on four occasions, Scottish Players Manager of the Year on five occasions, cinch Premiership Manager of the Season on five occasions, English Premier. Division Manager of the Year on ten occasions and Northwest Football Awards Manager of the Season on ten occasions.
Rob Newman as Chris from the Pet Shop Boys in the Mary Whitehouse Experience.
The poster for Charlie Sheen's 1998 thriller Postmortem
Scottish sickos
Scottish version of the sickos meme, via the Onion.
Forfar Athletic’s Baxter Bridie
Advert for Oxfordshire wind quintet Pavlova Winds’ upcoming gig in Northleach.
The statue of regicide inducing children’s character Paddington Bear at the statue his name was taken from. Presumably with a list of more celebrities he’s going to off in his suitcase.
Dougie Donnelly selling some carpets.
Bottle of ginger and a caramel wafer. GIRFUYE.
Shelbourne player Sean Gannon awarded the man of the match chainsaw by the match sponsors after their friendly against Celtic at Tolka Park. Something something cutting edge something, I dunno.
Spam bullshit from Linktree inviting me to fly England’s colours for the quarterfinals of the World Cup, making the hilariously wrong assumption I’m an England fan. I’d rather have cat AIDS you Aussie cunts.
Kay Burley grabbing an photographer by the neck during a media scrum outside a court.
Slightly blurry photo of the promo for the Russ Abbot Sketch Show staged performance at the Salford Sitcom showcase in July 2016.
1514. The Miskiw/Anderson Emails are not equivocal documents. They show Mr Miskiw offering and supplying information to Mr Anderson about two subjects: first, Sir Simon Hughes and HJK; secondly, Ms Frost Law and Jade Schmidt. The sequence begins with Mr Miskiw asking whether Mr Anderson had made progress with "the Simon Hughes boyfriend". Mr Anderson replied that they had been trying for a photograph but without success. Mr Miskiw then said that his source was putting pressure on him and asked whether Mr Anderson was interested in Sadie Frost. The later emails supplied detailed information about Jade Schmidt and Ms Frost Law, including information which, on the Claimants' case, could only realistically have come from voicemail interception. Mr Anderson answered: "thanks greg - we're going to give her a knock". The contemporaneous documents certainly demonstrate that Mr Johnson and Dr Harris both believed, in April 2016, that the Miskiw/Anderson Emails showed that the Mail on Sunday had received the product of voicemail interception carried out by Glenn Mulcaire.
A graph showing the blagging instances of British newspapers.
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A glass of Guinness and a copy of Carlo Rovelli’s new pamphlet 85 Seconds to Midnight on the pateo table.
Keir Starmer v @Keir_Starmer X.com As I get ready to pass on the torch to the next Labour leader and Prime Minister, here are my thoughts on our first two years in government. What we've done, and more importantly, who we have done it for. Read my latest Substack. open.substack.com/pub/keirstarme...
Primeval, the complete series one to five, on dvd, on a shelf in HMV.
A bin in a Cheltenham shopping centre advertising a rock and metal club night called 2 Pigs. But in a font that looks suspiciously like 2 Piss
The 64-year-old, who has previously managed the Kenyan and Ugandan national sides, admits "I'm not going to excite the Tartan Army" but thinks his backroom team could. McCoist managed Rangers and previously assisted Walter Smith with Scotland, Brown won much silverware captaining Celtic, while Thomson helped Rangers to a Uefa Cup final. "I tried to get through to [Scottish FA chief executive] lan Maxwell and the president, but it's not happened and I've obviously got someone else working on that to see if it is worth pursuing," 64-year-old Williamson told BBC Radio Scotland.
Headline from the BBC: Williamson eyes Scotland job with McCoist on staff Former Hibernian and Kilmarnock manager Bobby Williamson puts himself forward for the job as Scotland head coach leading a dream team of Ally McCoist, Scott Brown and Kevin Thomson.
From the Sky News website: Evri suing BBC for £1.2m over Panorama programme Evri is seeking damages and an injunction over the episode, saying it lost prospective contracts due to the programme and that couriers will also be put off working for the company.
The opening titles to the 1990s CITV version of the Tomorrow People - specifically, the Ramses Connection.
A stormtrooper draped in England flags with an ‘it’s coming home’ sign next to it. I’ll let you decide which one is the bad guy…
A Bakewell bun and a coffee at a nice coffee shop in Cheltenham.
= Entertainment Top Stories Adam Sandler officiated Taylor and Travis' v Millie Bobby Brown believes she was a closeted gay soldier who was killed with a sword in a past life The actress believes that a sword was pushed through her spine so that she was "completely paralyzed." By Emlyn Travis July 3, 2026 2:46 p.m. ET LOL, 3 LEAVE A COMMENT
Harry Souttar towering over everyone.
Maybe it's me. Maybe I'm the problem. Being unable to keep my attention on the game during these slower moments is most likely a symptom of my ADHD. But in an era when so many people have shorter attention spans anyway, due to short-form content consumption and the sheer breadth of entertainment media available, I think Red Dead Redemption 2 falls on the wrong side of the line.
The shorts for the new Motherwell kit, which have a sponsor called Lucky Tiger and a fucking awful GenAI created logo.
Jim Taggart is judging your typing.
Headline from the Graun: "Nigel Farage received £270,00o0 from gold marketer he promotes", with a picture of the frog faced fascist standing giving one of his Temu Hitler rally speeches.
Following the shock news of Clarke's resignation, many names have been put forward by fans in group chats and on social media, though two stand out above the others. Former Celtic and Tottenham boss Ange Postecoglou is one, while Everton manager David Moyes also represents a dream pick for the Tartan Army.
Somehow, Torchwood returned
A copy of Who’s Next, by Mark Clapham, Eddie Robson and James Cooray Smith.
"This has been a special, special group. And he's got the best out of them," said former Scotland winger Pat Nevin, a close friend of Clarke. "But a lot of them are not going to last. I know these days 40 seems young for a World Cup player. In reality, that's not the way it is, though. "It's not obvious who the next group of players are. So whoever comes in, it's actually a bit of a monster job to do."
Dana from The Pitt
Simon Day as Dave Angel Eco Warrior
Limmy dressed as Tina Tuner from his sketch show.
The back of a tuxedo cat’s head watching bbc four on an iPad.
Previously decent football periodical The Blizzard shilling a Scotland World Cup piece on their new account on fash supporting Substack.
Poster for The Feeling That the Time for Doing Something Has Passed, featuring a naked woman - writer/director Joanna Arnow - kneeing before a seated man looking at her with boredom on his face.
Steve Coogan as Dr Terrible, pronouncing ‘that was truly diabolical’
A render of the Doctor Who diamond logo but with the punchline to a notorious joke from Doctor Who Night (1999) on it
To address this we will: • explore options for strategic reform to the PSM system with the aim of better reflecting how people consume media and to address the regulatory and economic challenges this poses. We want the system of PSM to be more flexible to changes in the market, and to allow for the potential for a greater or different range of PSM providers that deliver content in different ways. Ultimately, we want a system that encourages the creation of more public service content, reversing the trend of recent years which has seen the output of our PSM providers decline.
2.2. Prominence of news on social media The UK's media landscape consists of a diverse array of news providers, encompassing PSM providers alongside a wide range of national, regional, and local news organisations. While PSM providers operate under independent Ofcom regulation for due impartiality and accuracy, the wider traditional news media ecosystem is self-regulatory, underpinned by codes of practice, which govern professional and editorial standards and are, in many cases, overseen by independently established regulators. Trustworthy and reliable news, and the providers that deliver this, is essential to our democratic foundations, ensuring a comprehensive breadth of coverage that reflects the lives and concerns of communities across every nation and region of the UK. News consumption increasingly takes place online, and often via social media platforms. This delivers benefits in terms of the variety of news available, especially to international news sources, but also means algorithms on social media platforms like Meta platforms have a significant role in determining what audiences see and that high-quality, reliable or regulated news may not be easy to find. In this context there is a risk that less accurate sources of news and information displace more trustworthy news sources. In 2024, 43% of people said they encountered some form of misinformation or 'deepfakes'. 71% of those who were exposed to misinformation said this was online (including websites and social media). [footnote 33] While lots of users encounter misleading content, a third of UK adults say they are not confident in their ability to identify Al-generated material. tootnote 34l Furthermore, a recent study suggests that people's confidence in spotting Al-generated material is often higher than their actual ability. A lack of consistent access to reliable, trustworthy information can pose chronic risks to our democracy, public safety, and social cohesion. As reflected in the government's Pro…
Cinema ticket for Disclosure Day at Cheltenham Everyman cinema, with the opulent lounge behind it.
Gareth David-Lloyd, Sophie Aldred and Tracy-Ann Oberman are among the ensemble cast of Torchwood: Legacy, a special full-cast audio drama coming September and October 2027.
Screenshot of the Glasgow Herald website, where the top story of the arts and culture section is currently “Greggs relocates to bigger unit at The Forge Shopping Centre in Glasgow”