Nate 'The Late' Carney

@inapproprinate.bsky.social

4145 Followers 508 Following

Justice, tempered by Mercy; Anger, tempered by Snark. Professional Amateur. Chronic insomniac. Aggressively progressive. Hopeful cynic. A lie has speed; truth has endurance. If I can't set a good example, then I'll serve as a cautionary tale.

Now That's What I Call A Total Waste Of Time

Now entering Florida

Ask yourself what poor life choices led to this

Text says MEANWHILE IN FLORIDA...

Image shows an alligator waiting to attack from a pothole in the middle of a blacktop road

Matt Damon as Oddyseus, tied to the mast, eyes closed and screaming

Picture of a very fuzzy headed ostrich baby looking quite bedraggled. Text - THAT MONDAY MORNING GLOW.

Little flying bug, died on my windowsill.

Proof this joke should have been attributed to the author.

Post from someone named Tollytb:

I don't like country music, but I don't denigrate those who do.

And for those who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.

Reply from Nate 'The Late Carney:

This joke was purlo8ned from Bob Newhart.

And for those not smart enough to write their own material, purlo8ned means stolen.

Jared Leto with his face all smashed up in Fight Club.

Matt Damon as Odysseus tied to the mast, eyes closed, screaming

A "Golden Poop" award I was given after a successful season of scaring the crap out of people at a haunted house. It's a bit of construction foam painted gold, mounted on a wooden platform, also gold painted. I left it in the back window of my car and the sun turned it mostly black.

Me, looking terrible. Hair deliberately askew, unshaven, bags under the bags under my eyes. Not frowning but not smiling either.

Three panel image. Top panel is of a lovely day at a crowded beach, and has "2:45 PM" in the lower left corner. Second panel is of a fairly terrible storm, Grey skies and palm trees blowing sideways in high wind and rain, "3:00 PM". Bottom panel is the sane picture as the top panel, "3:15 PM". Full image is captioned SUMMER IN FLORIDA.

Florida golf course during a major lightining storm. Circled is a complete idiot still holding a large metal rod overhead during said major lightning storm.

An image thst shows the person being mentioned above has blocked me or been blocked by me.

Dr Manhattan events repeat meme

A mock weather forecast which shows all if Florida in bright pink or deep red. Various cities have different descriptions for how hot it is today. Tampa, for instance, is "surface of the sun", while North Point is "That One Part of the Inside of a Hot Pocket". Jacksonville is "Gates of Hell", while Daytona is merely "Oven" levels of heat.

Black and white photo, a young man holds a giant protest sign in front of the US Capitol. The sign reads

I WANT YOU TO STOP BEING AFRAID

OF OTHER AMERICANS
OF OTHER RELIGIONS
OF OTHER CLASSES
OF OTHER NATIONS
OF SPEAKING OUT

YOU'RE AMERICANS. ACT LIKE IT!

IF YOU DON'T GET IT, ASK AN AMERICAN WHO DOES!

Possum screaming in black and white.

Text in spooky font - THE BEST PART OF WAKING UP IS SCREAMING WHAT THE FUCK

Hunter Biden with commentary on the ridiculous speech Trump made at the Correspondents Dinner.

White Jeep with orange and black lettering on the side that says WHITE TRASH. In another spot nearby it says BOOBIE BOUNCER with the double O stylized to look like breasts. There is also a Florida state outline.

Chicken biscuits and gravy and fixins.

A literal dumpster on fire, lots of smoke pouring out of the top of a long rectangular dumpster sitting in a driveway. Hoses from an off camera fire truck snake across the ground.

Magnolia, Fallout 4

Matt Damon as Odysseus, tied to the mast.

Scrolling Roku City, all done up in purples, with a small Jimothy racoon shape under a street lamp.

Herculoids gleep

Spain's World Cup victory photo, edited to remove unnecessary baggage.

Picture of the Spanish World Cup team celebrating their victory, with a few people who don't matter very easily cropped from the edges of the photo.

A photo of three books, Prey and Sphere by Michael Crichton, and Mr Laurel & Mr Hardy by John McCabe

Two phone notifications. One of a message being deposited that is reaply long and drawn out and tries very unsuccessfully to claim I'm in the position of owing the government a ton of money, which the caller would LOVE to help me resolve, for a bunch MORE money. The secind is a note from my phone telling me that I missed a call (same time) from 'Scam Likely'

A very very long explanation of the power of a joke, and why we should always watch our words, lest we start down a dark path which can ultimately lead to fascism.

Black square wooden sign that says DUNGEON MASTER in black white and pink. Hanging on a white wall.

what, from the bottom of my heart, the fuck

Front cover of a Bat Out Of Hell CD, signed by Meatloaf.

WE ARE NOT DROPPING THE EPSTEIN THING

HERE WE FUCKING GO AGAIN

I MEAN GOOD MORNING

Black t-shirt, white letters

SOME DAYS, IT'S JUST NOT WORTH CHEWING THROUGH THE RESTRAINTS.

Weather notifications for Ormond Beach Florida.

A notification at 4:20 AM warning that UV levels will be extreme and to limit sun exposure

A notification at 5:47 AM about showers and thunderstorms later in the day.

Sam Neill as Captain 2nd rank Vasily Borodin, Executive Officer of Red October

William Shakespeare writing...

Then he said unto Felicia

Make haste with thy departure

The two finger salute, with THOUGHTS running down one finger, PRAYERS down the other, and an ampersand between.

Phone notifications at 7:25 Tuesday July 7

A Google notification that weather today in Ormond Beach includes a 35% chance of scattered thunderstorms

A local weather notification stating UV will be extreme. Limit sun exposure if possible.

Mountain Dew can labeled as American Dew, with red white and blue vertical stripes near the top of the can, above the name.

Text - Wo-oah, we're halfway there/ Wo-oah,

Image is of a lizard in a tiny folding chair

HERE WE FUCKING GO AGAIN

I MEAN GOOD MORNING

What, from the bottom of my heart, the fuck

Painting of George Washington. Text below:

"Me and my homies woulda been stacking bodies by now."

- George Washington

It is with a heavy heart and great sadness that we report: Donald Trump woke up this morning.

Screenshot from a duckduckgo search for 'best doirs lyrics' showing that the result isn't a list, but is instead simply the lyrics for 'The End'.

The Blue Area Are Where People Are Kung Fu Fighting

Based on a study done by Carl Douglas in 1974

(Image is of a world map with every land mass in blue)

Desert trail with a red sign attached to a reflector post. Sign reads 'HEAT WARNING' in large white letters, then in smaller letters it says 'you might die'

What a great nap, I feel totally disoriented and I'm frothing with hate

(Image is of Agent Dale Cooper of Twin Peaks driving and dictating into a tape recorder, with tv fuzz in the background outside the car)

Very tiny lizard perched on top of blades of grass.

A large and dimly lit room, made crowded and cramped by all the random things on shelves everywhere. Along one wall is a sign on which says 'DUDDITS', and another that says 'telepathy, Derry, favorite things, broken promises'

Dicktim: when you act like a dick, and then act like a victim about it.

MAN GOES VIRAL FOR HIS EPIC REPLY TO A JOB REJECTION EMAIL

To [redacted] Careers,

Dear hiring team,

Thank you for your interest in rejecting my application.

I have reviewed your rejection email and was impressed by your decision making process and commitment to moving forward with other candidates.

However, I have received many rejection letters this year. Therefore, after careful consideration, I have decided not to accept your rejection at this time.

Once again, I appreciate your courage to reject me and wish you every success in rejecting other candidates.

I look forward to joining the team soon.

Best regards,