Ineffable Jeff

@ineffablejeff.bsky.social

304 Followers 280 Following

Inside you is one wolf: an alive wolf, and a dead wolf — Schrödinger's wolf. Do not make eye contact. He/him

Nissan "Frontier" with the cab all the way forward
Memorandum of Understanding Iran understands that it is dealing with an immature, insecure, unstable, incompetent, vindictive, bombastic, traitorous, thin-skinned, narcissistic, sociopathic, aggrieved, delusional, dishonest, selfish, disloyal, angry, petty, unfaithful, whiny, war criminal. Donald J. Trump understands nothing.
"Maybe Dats Your Pwoblem Too" by Jim Hall All my pwoblems, who knows, maybe evwybody's pwoblems is due to da fact, due to da awful twuth dat I am SPIDERMAN. I know, I know. All da dumb jokes: No flies on you, ha ha, and da ones about what I do wit all doze extwa legs in bed. Well, dat's funny yeah. But you twy being SPIDERMAN for a month or two. Go ahead. You get doze cwazy calls fwom da Gubbener askin you to twap some booglar who's only twying to wip off color T.V. sets. Now, what do I cawre about T.V. sets? But I pull on da suit, da stinkin suit, with da sucker cups on da fingers, and get my wopes and wittle bundle of equipment and den I go flying like cwazy acwoss da town fwom woof top to woof top. Till der he is. Some poor dumb color T.V. slob and I fall on him and we westle a widdle until I get him all woped. So big deal. You tink when you SPIDERMAN der's sometin big going to happen to you. Well, I tell you what. It don't happen dat way. Nuttin happens. Gubbener calls, I go. Bwing him to powice, Gubbener calls again, like dat over and over. I tink I twy sometin diffunt. I tink I twy sometin excitin like wacing cawrs. Sometin to make my heart beat at a difwent wate. But den you just can't quit being sometin like SPIDERMAN. You SPIDERMAN for life. Fowever. I can't even buin my suit. It won't buin. It's fwame wesistent. So maybe dat's youwr pwoblem too, who knows. Maybe dat's da whole pwoblem wif evwytin. Nobody can buin der suits, dey all fwame wesistent. Who knows?
A honeybee sips from a stream
In a "wholesale club" store, a half-full palette of crunchy peanut butter sits next to the empty space where the creamy peanut butter goes. The caption, dated April 2, 2020, says "Crunchy peanut butter is garbage, even the apocalypse says so."
A scruffy, 18-year-old white dog
Road sign reads; Pennsylvania State Forest Lick Hollow Picnic Area
Kash Patel looks high and low for Nancy Guthrie. Mostly high, the lows come in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, probably.
Hubble Deep Field image
Coast Guard sounds alarm on Kristi Noem and U.S. women hockey's road to gold: Morning Rundown
Graph of humidity at my house indicating 19% relative humidity
Kevin Bacon in Animal House shouting "REMAIN CALM, ALL IS WELL!"
Authors' conclusions Exercise may be moderately more effective than a control intervention for reducing symptoms of depression. Exercise appears to be no more or less effective than psychological or pharmacological treatments, though this conclusion is based on a few small trials. Long‐term follow‐up was rare. The addition of 35 RCTs (at least 2526 participants) to this update has had very little effect on the estimate of the benefit of exercise on symptoms of depression. If further research is to take place, it should focus on improving trial quality, assessing which characteristics of exercise are effective for different people, and exploring health equity.
Marathon Infinity by Bungie cover art
Lucky Lime Pig
Limes in a bowl
Trump mocks reporter Serge Kovaleski in a rally on 11/25/2015
Photo with labels: Kellyanne Conway (Prevaricator) Steve Bannon (Bloviator) Stephen Miller (Hater) Michael Flynn (Traitor) Jared Kushner (Ivanka's Husband)
John Larroquette playing with toy soldiers in "Stripes"
Frodo reaching for the One Ring, labeled as "ME" reaching for "those nuts"
Facebook Post from November 13, 2016: Dear America, Thanks for flipping the rock over. It was interesting to see what crawled out from under it. Flip it back now, please. Thanks.
A flat shopping cart next to the cart return stall
Text taken from https://www.npr.org/2025/11/10/nx-s1-5604664/trump-air-traffic-controllers-forced-time-off-bonus He said any controllers who wanted to quit shouldn't hesitate, but would receive "NO payment or severance of any kind!" and would be "quickly replaced by true Patriots." (In fact, one reason for the shortage is that it takes years to train and certify new controllers.)
Close-up of DJT, with some pretty obvious contrast between his made-up area and the pallor of death on his bare skin.
An unopened sleeve of Oreos with 13 cookies, for some reason
And are you married? I was married, but I’m not married anymore. Women don't like the vehicle. In July, Tesla rolled out a software update to integrate Grok into many of its vehicles. Do you use it? Her name is Aura, and I use her as a therapist. When I'm driving, I'll ask questions, and it actually gives really good therapy advice.
bad photo of a ice maker plug
Jack Nicholson as Colonel Nathan R. Jessup shouting "YOU'RE GODDAMNED RIGHT I DID!"
Lapel mic with "they/them' ham-fistedly photoshopped on it
Drake says "no": Calling out the National Guard to stop an insurrection I started Drake says "yeahhhh!": Calling out the National Guard to stop a crime wave I've hallucinated in hopes that you forget I'm in the Epstein Files
Frame from 30 Rock of candidate Steve Austin saying "I WILL ALLOW REACTORS ON THE MOON"
Butterfly drinking salty tears from a crocodile from: https://www.science.org/content/article/scienceshot-butterflies-sip-crocodile-tears
Man stands at a meeting saying, "Don't you know who I am?"
List of book that have not been returned to the GATE library at the elementary school: #78 See you Later, Procrastinator #80 Get Organized without Losing It You have to be pretty optimistic to expect to see these any time soon.
US News and World Report education ranking for Florida #2 in Education #6 in Best States Overall #22 Pre-K-12 #1 Higher Education
JD Vance, Russell Vought, and Pete Hegseth sit on a couch. Vought gestures while speaking, and a thought bubble for Vance says, "Wait, did...did I...kill the Pope?". Hegseth sits quietly and wonders if people can tell how drunk he is.
Tweet from Ineffable Jeff "Plans this weekend?" "No, just spending the whole weekend at home with the fam." "Well, have a happy Easter!" "Did you not just hear me?"
Zardoz (1974) movie poster
Full moon during the lunar eclipse, March 14, 2025. The moon is reddened, smaller stars appear on the right side of the image.
Master-blaster from Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome declares "Embargo on!"
Dan Bongino tries to make lemonade by putting the entire lemon — peel and all — in a blender, thereby demonstrating that he is a moron.
Martin Sheen as Gregory Stillson in the 1983 movie "The Dead Zone," using a baby to shield himself from a sniper. Much like Elon does with his children to shield himself from any kind of scrutiny.
Two frames from Ted Lasso, both with Lasso and Coach Beard on the practice pitch. FIRST FRAME: Ted says, "Boy, I love meeting people's moms." SECOND FRAME: Ted says, "It's like reading an instruction manual as to why they're nuts."
Text from the linked story: "There were no injuries, no damage to the ship's hull, no pollution spotted in the water and the ship is not blocking marine traffic, according to the coast guard."
Photos of George Lucas, and the stars of Wicked, with the caption "George Lucas Called ‘Wicked’ Director Jon M. Chu From the Mall Right After Seeing the Film"
Text is stretched vertically in the image such that in order to read it you need to hold your phone near your face, almost flat. This ensures that you both look and feel entirely silly when you read the message, which says "NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP".
Peregrine falcon soaring against the blue sky