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@jackphelps.online

163 Followers 141 Following

they call me ben simmons cause I don't play at all

Wendy's soda cup and THC tincture
92% woke 8% chud 44% techbro 56% neo-luddite 31% hopepilled 69% doomer (nice) 52% davos 48% dubai (100% politburo) closest match zohran and I take any close match as an insult because I wish to be seen as esoteric
office space frame "No way. Why should I change? He's the one who sucks."
hallway banner for horse handicapping convention that reads "Welcome to the National Horseplayers Championship"
i load the bots and pretend i'm donk for hours
we @kanwetwitty To little kid eyeing my McDonalds: thats right i can eat this any time i want... Dont ask about any of the other parts of my life please. 4:33 PM • Jul 20, 2015
Riley Soloner appearing on The Chris Gethard Show as Vacation Jason
cropped screenshot of an email from Ticketmaster, subject line reads "Brandon Wardell Has Been Cancelled"
screenshot of a tweet (I know) that reads "Paint it Black came on and this guy yelled 'THE STONES' so loud. I'm dedicating my Friday night to him" pictured is a man at a barstool with long white hair glasses and a ball cap. he looks really cool.
screenshot of a youtube video from Eric Estepp but the title is cut off to read "NASCAR Unveils BRAND-NEW Championship Format | Reaction & Anal..."
frame from the show of him on the news with the lower third "louie ck comedian/masturbator"
dali's persistence of memory
sunny at the lake. two kayaks a canoe a pedal boat visible on shore. beach chairs and a swimming dock also visible. hell yes.
tightly cropped google maps screenshot showing a 1 day 15 hour route from Arizona to Massachusetts
twitter screenshot "Welcome to Twitter. Here is your copy of the Communist Manifesto and a season pass to Monday Night RAW for some reason"
50 American dollars, two 20s and two fives, ironically spread over my right arm
The Ratchet Effect: How you are being duped by the fake two-party system. Democrats block movement back to the left Republicans turn everything to the right
video of me getting my covid shot in my car March 2021
"whenever I have to stop at this corner I always think people in cars are, like, checking me out, making faces at me" *pan to giant model t Rex on street corner* "it's probably not me"
campaign sign for a Tucson City Council candidate on an orange background prominently displaying only the candidate's first name
the new colossus poem as seen on the inscription of the statue of Liberty
a stack of the paper napkins you fold like
bernie sanders and jeremy corbyn
hoo boy where do we start with this one. I'll say that like above it's a dork enthusiastically posing in front of a barely legible fortnite win screen with his mouth wide open but not in any particular recognizable mouth shape, and he's throwing the rock and roll horns perpendicular to the ground for some reason.
New Hampshire storefront sign reading "GUNS-N-ROCKS / Firearms & Minerals / BUY • SELL • TRADE"
cropped deck blue screenshot showing the notification "David Leavitt followed you" just because I said the name of one magic card.
small screencapture from live coverage of a chess match. cropped only to show a large metal water bottle next to a player's namecard, showing an American flag
honestly if you are visually impaired that's good because it means that you don't have to look at me. i'm making a really stupid half pog half soy face and im in front of a computer monitor showing a "#1 Victory Royale" fortnite splash
meme cartoon of two guys on a bus (you've seen this one) the guy looking at the cliff's caption reads "spending $15 at home" and for the guy enjoying the scenery "spending $15 while traveling"
yard sign placed in between sidewalk and road. two oversized American pickup trucks are visible in the background. the sign reads "RJ Ornamental Fabrication, LLC QUALITY & EFFICIENT WORK AT A GREAT VALUE free estimates 520-388-0566
small screencapture from live coverage of a chess match. cropped only to show a large metal water bottle next to a player's namecard, showing an American flag
Markus "Notch" Persson
boss tweed
Always Sunny frame with Mac and a caption reading "I'm playing *both* sides, so that I always come out on top.
Pete
incredibly crunchy and low res screenshot of an also crunchy instagram reel showing Jimmy Butler in his Miami Heat jersey. a caption reads "'Tobias Harris over me?' - Jimmy Butler"
Hans Moleman: "I was saying BOOurns"
screenshot of a message board thread title with a "Help" category tag applied. The title reads "Arch Linux - Audio Not Working"
lenin
the shaq quote "I owe you an apology"
screenshot of a NASCAR app news article stating that lead weights were added to the hydration packs (and other cabling components) of the 34 and 51 cars
the first four races of the indycar calendar spaced out nearly a month apart and racing in Alabama in May. shameful!
screenshot of a youtube suggestion of NASCAR's official "Radioactive" Video compilation of radio messages from last week's Atlanta race. the title and the thumbnail both advertise the video with the quote "I don't care if I wreck the whole fucking field"
a one-star review of a local skatepark with the body text "The chaos extremely loud music and lingering smell of weed mixed with the trash kinda killed the vibes"
Kevin Harvick posing with his 2020 NASCAR Regular Season Trophy
youtube thumbnail from s1mple's first run on Liquid, reading Meet Liquid s1mple and showing a picture of young Oleksandr
grainy candid of a pre-wwf "rowdy" Roddy Piper, championship belt strapped to his waist just above his dark blue and white kilt and bagpipes in his right hand. his t shirt reads, in iron on stencils, "I AM STILL NUMBER 1"
a pinetime smart watch, a small folding knife, an r36s retro handheld paused on a frame of sonic the hedgehog 2 where sonic is stuck in a spike pit with no rings about to die, a keychain with an earplug case and usb thumb drive, a slim front pocket wallet with a costco card and debit card poking out of the card slots, and a jbl wireless earbud case, neatly arranged like a total dork
original WWF King of the Ring logo
screenshot of a suggested youtube video titled "Maine's two dedicated-gluten-free breweries are satisfying more than palettes"
classic unedited meme reading: this is Google+ bitch we clown in this motherfucka betta take yo sensitive ass back to Facebook
smirking man in Adidas hoodie and Subaru trucker hat next to a white first generation Toyota Prius
Trader Joe's Pound Plus milk chocolate bar with caramel, pretzel bits & sea salt
a young cannabis plant in a small gray pot with a background of grow tent reflective material. a humidifier and other empty pots are visible in the background as well. there is a tag in the soil naming the strain, "White Widow"
a beer glass, about half foam, next to a can of non-alcoholic Samuel Adams IPA
outdoor sign for "La Playa Offices"
You've Been Passed The Virtual Joint!