Jeff Wells

@jeffwe.com

93 Followers 736 Following

Mostly a dad but sometimes I work. Owner of DoCPR.com. I like vinyl records.

I don’t think the President should use the power of their office to promote any individual private business. It’s not fair. It’s not very American. Except for Monster Jam. If I were President, every American would get one free annual ticket to their closest Monster Jam event. Hear me out... The country’s a mess right now—people yelling, marching in the streets, families dodging politics at dinner, and Congress can’t even agree on what day it is. We’ve got culture wars, economic anxiety, and now tariffs driving up the cost of everything. Half the country thinks the President is their salvation and the other half thinks their 5-year-old could create better economic policies. And it doesn't matter which recent President you are talking about. Monster trucks don’t care about that stuff. All they need is big wheels, a shit ton of diesel, and something to destroy. No, I’m not talking about the lifted trucks you see on the highway with steel testicles dangling from the hitch - most of which have never seen dirt in their lives. I’m talking about the real deal: Gravedigger, El Toro Loco, Zombie. 12,000-pound miracles of American engineering doing backflips over crushed sedans. You want healing? Give every citizen a free ticket to their local Monster Jam. Red, blue, left, right, whatever —none of it matters when a truck the size of a small house is launching off a ramp while some guy in jorts yells “HELL YEAAAAAAAAH” while spilling their nacho cheese everywhere. When two dudes are sitting next to each other at a Monster Jam event, they don't give a shit who voted for what. They're just watching these behemoths crushing school busses while they crush light beer. That’s America.