John Weinert

@johnweinert1.bsky.social

127 Followers 109 Following

The Andy Richter of beverage lunacy He/Him ☧ ☭ https://jweinert.itch.io

I’m carrying water bottles
Yours truly, standing in the infinite prism elevator. I’m holding two large water bottles kind of awkwardly as I hold up my phone to take a picture.
The photographer’s bare, pale legs extend into center frame. In the background is a duffel bag on a small drawer, a fan, and a tiny hotel tv with its plug dangling below. The photographer is reclining on a bed.
My mom, my dad, myself, and Sydney, all trapped in an infinitely reflecting cube barely large enough to hold us
A doner kebab in a wrap, ready to be eaten.
The sign for the Jorvik Viking Centre, featuring the face of a stern Viking warrior in deep shadow.
A sign above a door handle. The sign says “to open, operate handle” with an arrow pointing down at the handle
A Diet Coke Cherry. It has a British label.
A sign in front of a wooden background. The text of the sign reads “Cope Chest This large wooden chest dates from the 12th century. It was used for storing copes, which are long mantles or cloaks worn by members of the clergy for ceremonial occasions. The copes would be laid flat in the chest, with the front edges brought over to the centre, to minimise folding and creasing. Copes could be relatively plain, or made of rich fabrics with exquisite embroidery. In 1370 Canon David de Woolor bequeathed two copes, one of black velvet decorated with gold embroidery and stars, and one with gold thread with an image of the Virgin Mary surrounded by coral stones.”
An upper corner of a bathroom. Visible is the edge of a wooden door, a gray tiled wall, and a white ceiling. On the ceiling is a small gray square, which has a button on it.
The Heathrow Airport baggage reclaim area. In the corner text says “Heathrow airport” in the Bloodborne font
A sign above a toilet fixture that says “Non-potable water. Do Not Drink.”
An ad for Northern Arizona University printed on the back of a fortune cookie
A plate of food. Clockwise from top: Fried shrimp, sweet and sour chicken, spicy shrimp, pork fried rice, beef broccoli, kimchi
A DAW timeline with the text "FILE EXPORTED" in the Dark Souls 1 "Victory Achieved" font
Oblivion loading screen that says "Audio connectors come in a variety of shapes and sizes."
MGS codec call: "Nachos are a great, highly-customizable easy meal. They're nice because you can microwave them but they're still crunchy"
A rock on the beach. It has a bunch of dark cracks in it.
A dense city of mussels and barnacles, exposed by the low tide.
A white car with like three big sticks strapped to its top rack
The Necrobinder in Memoji style, whose mind has just been blown
A warthog whose mind has been blown
The cover art for Neil Cicierega’s Mouth Moods. Teal and orange lighting a white man’s face. He’s wearing glasses and doing the Doctor Evil face with his hand
The screaming guy from the In The Court of the Crimson King album art
Gonzo's beat up truck for his plumbing company, with the faucet Gonzo on top. His chicken girlfriend is riding shotgun.
The album art for The Sunset Tree. It depicts a large oak(?) silhouetted against the evening sky as the sun sets behind it.
The Mega Bloks Dragons collection poster
A Far Side Cartoon depicting the bridge of the NCC-1701 USS Enterprise (er, sorta). The captain reads "The crew of the Starship Enterprise encounters the floating head of Zsa Zsa Gabor". Kirk is saying "Quick, Mr. Sulu!... Get those defense shields up!" On the view screen is the massive floating head of Hungarian-American actress and socialite Zsa Zsa Gabor. Look, I love The Far Side and Gary Larson is a living legend, but this is a mess. Everyone's wearing yellow uniforms, and Spock is sitting at the front of the bridge instead of over at the side with his weird little viewfinder thing. The other crew member doesn't really look like Sulu, as well. It could be Chekov, maybe? While researching the usage of "defense shields" (inconclusive, might or might not be a plausible term) I learned that shields don't make much of an appearance in early Star Trek: The Original Series. To quote from the wikipedia page for Shields (Star Trek): "The first depicted use by a starship was in the Star Trek episode "Arena", in which the USS Enterprise raises its 'screens' after being attacked by an alien warship although the term 'shields' is not used in this episode. Shields are not mentioned during the earlier seasons of the Star Trek: Enterprise series, starships instead using "polarized hull plating" to make their hull more resistant to damage." Anyway, the core of the joke still works, both by because of the absurdity of it all but also because yeah, they sure do encounter a lot of giant floating heads out there in space, don't they? What's up with that?
The album art of Islands, depicting the Trifid Nebula
The Far Side by Gary Larson. The caption says “Inconvenience stores”. A boy looks up at the only set of shelves in a massively high-ceilinged store, which are about 60 feet off the ground.
An 8.5”x8.5” terrain piece with two blue-green swampy patches and dirt and rocks. A collapsing fence sits next to a sad garden patch, and a spooky scarecrow wearing a shako hat leans in the corner.
A square board (8.5" on each side). It's covered in dirt, small rocks, and small plants. On one end are two swampy pools, one of which has cat tails growing by it. On the other end is a sad garden plot with tufts of grass(?) growing on tilled soil. A rickety fence divides the two sections.
The album art for The Great Depression. A collage of photos including children playing in the snow, an artistic rendering of a medical diagram of bones and the circulatory and nervous systems, and a man smoking a cigarette. The text "Defiance, Ohio" is at the top, and "The Great Depression" is at the bottom
A scrub daddy. It was used as beta art for the Silent card Abrasive in Slay the Spire 2.
A long and thin object, white and purple, bent in the middle
The cover art for “White Lighter” by Typhoon: A moth superimposed over an orange smudge on a white background.
Some nasty chocolate
Sean Bean as Richard Sharpe from the Sharp TV series. Behind him stands a row of redcoat soldiers, probably men of the South Essex
Yours truly, looking into the screen from very close. There’s a blue sci-fi digital screen effect over me. Matt is standing behind me.
A cool thing about Linux is you'll just wake up one day and your internet speed on just one device will be 10% of what it should be. And on every forum where people are having the same issue all the responses are "Yes indeedy that's what's happening"
A figure in a leather coat, boots, and a metal breastplate. It’s wearing a red turban. It’s pointing a revolver in its right hand and holding a wooden pole with a green and gold flag in its left.
A carrot cake sliced open to show the interior. Three layers of cake with a layer of icing in between each layer. The cake has toasted pecans garnishing the top
A carrot cake with thin, drippy frosting. It’s leaning dangerously.
The DVD cover for “Horse Healing”, featuring a girl and a horse bathed in the golden light of the setting sun
Yours truly in 2016. I'm holding a bust of Shakespeare next to my head, and a face swap app has swapped our faces
A front view of a miniature of a soldier wearing a green surcoat tied with a red leather belt. He has a mail collar. The miniature is wearing a light gray turban and golden mask with a lifelike face, and a leather tube is attached to the mask. Its left hand is resting on a sheathed sword, and its right hand is leaning a massive long gun on its shoulder. The base is muddy.
“I Really Like Slop!” by Mo Willems
A painted miniature cannon
A Reddit post of a picture of a cake with a fondant hammer and sickle on it
A wide shot of a bunch of miniature soldiers with a cannon
A gray plastic miniature of a soldier in a squatting position. It has a jezzail hanging by its strap on its right shoulder, and its left hand is resting on the plunger of a detonator. It’s wearing a gas mask and a small conical hat. It’s a sapper, a soldier trained in demolitions and siege warfare.
A gray plastic miniature. It’s wearing medieval plate armor, a cape, an optical gas mask, and a turban with a large feather on it. It’s holding a very large gun in its right hand and pointing with its left. A curved sword is buckled at its waist. He’s pointing and has a feather and cape because he’s the leader.
@iainnd.bsky.social I have rubbed off and pulled
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“Ghost-Hunting for dummies” by Zak Bagans. On the cover is a spooky staircase and Zak himself. He looks like a stage magician (derogatory).
A candy bar called “Bubu Lubu”
Lorien from Babylon 5
A text message that reads “These streams are everyone figuring out how to be mean to each other in as funny a way as possible. It’s wonderful.”
At one point, cans of petrol being carried on Musical Box's roof were ruptured by small-arms fire and fuel leaked into the cabin; the crew had to don gas masks to survive the fumes. Eventually, a German shell disabled it and as the crew abandoned the tank, one of them was shot and killed and the other two were taken prisoner.
During this battle, one Whippet – Musical Box – advanced so far it was cut off behind German lines. For nine hours it roamed at will, destroying an artillery battery, an observation balloon, the camp of an infantry battalion and a transport column of the German 225th Division, inflicting many casualties.