Kelcey

@kelceydr.bsky.social

195 Followers 158 Following

One half of a whole chef at Spoke Wine Bar. You may have heard about my chili crisp. She/they

Photo of a construction site which includes an official sign that says “Nothing you do on this site today will be as important as going home to your family and loved ones
A table covered in collage materials of squash photographs and playboy pictures and various pieces of ad text. The centerpiece shows a woman looking fondly at a giant knobbly squash, with the text “oh, darling, you have everything i’ve always wanted”
A picture of a “Zara Man” storefront but the lighted sign has very close kerning and says zaraman
Screencap from tv show “Fleabag” in two panels, the first showing Fleabag saying “are you okay Father?” And the second showing Hot Priest saying “oh fuck you calling me father like it doesn’t turn you on just to say” Except in both instances “father” has been blacked out and replaced with “chef” and hot priest has been poorly photoshopped with a chef hat and apron
A picture of a tin of what claims to be “rimming sugar”
A hand holding a shallot approximately the size of one finger joint, against a background of normal-sized shallots
Picture of an extremely messily handpainted sign in a construction zone that says: “Dunkin CLOSED 9-8-2025 to 9-15 SEP”
Opening credit screen of “The Third Man” showing text that reads “zither music played by anton karas”
Three round scoops of pale yellow ice cream posed inside an open green corn husk on top of a patio chair
A large group of pigeons convenes over a full slice of pizza
A rectangle of ice cream sandwich with yellow cake and tan ice cream in a dish of red syrup
A seared brick of taro pace shows golden layers flecked with purple, a bright green pea sauce underneath, and a jewel-toned salad with shredded coconut, lime leaf, and res tobiko
A woman with a half purple half shaved haircut waggles her eyebrows and winks at the screen while producing an enormous taro root from out of sight
Captain America screenshot that usually says “I understood that reference” but it says “I didn’t understand”
Gif of Captain Holt in Brooklyn 99 pretending to be straight by saying awkwardly heterosexual things like “i see a pair of thick weighty breasts and all logic flies out the window”
Full profile shot of a titanium bike in sunlight on a bike path
A scoop of ice cream with pink flecks rests on a rumpled piece of white fabric scattered with rose petals
Two square pans of ice cream with scoops taken out and on a plate. The top is a deep bright orange, the bottom an off-white with flecks
A plate on a splayed stack of restaurant menu pages, the plate has hints of pink but is mostly covered in a cloud of what you assume is grated cheese but actually also contains Horseradish
Screenshot of the iPhone camera app on portrait mode detecting “natural light” while the object in front of the lens is a can of Natural Light beer
Picture of two rectangular containers of ice cream on a deep green background. One container is a sunny yellow, the other pale brown with green flecks
A discarded water bottle with a label that says “basically purified water” where “basically” seems to be the brand but the proximity to “purified water” leaves room for skepticism
Photo of a traffic light with both red and green illuminated at the same time
Shirt with a print of Madeline Kahn in Clue during the “flames, flames on the side of my face” scene
A sticker on a pedestrian overpass railing (showing the Cambridge St bridge between Harvard and Allston in the background) the sticker depicts a skeleton hand holding a shopping basket and says “basket til the casket” in a mimicry of the Market Basket grocery store font
A collaged picture of two hands clasped, one arm ends in a jar of mayonnaise, the other in a head of cabbage. Text above says “the first taste will amaze you”
An array of collaged cards that use cut-out photos of cabbage to censor nude photos, or substitute the cabbage for another primary item in the photo. These collages are captioned with excerpts from cigarette ads and food reviews that tout the delicious nature of cabbage
Excerpt of an article about a bar opening from Eater.com containing an awkwardly shoehorned paragraph about the bar owners using chatgpt to answer construction questions
Two containers with frozen treats formed into scoops- one sunny satsuma-coconut sorbet, the other pale green bay leaf ice cream. A hand holds a satsuma, its own leaves replaced with bay leaves
A pot of foaming milk with bay leaves on top, to be infused for ice cream
A foggy night on an empty street, streetlamps glowing behind trees
Quince fruit in a pan of russet-ruby poaching liquid
Burrata cut in half to look like the whites of hardboiled eggs and piped with yolk filling on top of celery and parsley salad
Picture of a theater marquee with upcoming movies “Babygirl” and “Nosferatu” next to each other. Superimposed collage of a still photo of Nosferatu with a pink emoji bow on his head
Video shows lamb necks in rich meaty braising liquid, falling off the bone as tweezers lift the meat up
Picture of a long rubberband on asphalt, coiled into the shape of a dick and balls