MORON

@longtermstorage.bsky.social

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I fell asleep at the wheel and boy are my alms tired #proudIDIOT #moronicle #clinicallyclumsoid #baltimore

a black squirrel hops along a fence line with a round rice cake in their mouth. the rice cake is too large to fit through the fence. The squirrel keeps hopping down the line. It’s really cute.
r/peyote u/AvantGardenGallery • 4h • i.redd.it Rabbit ate my cactus, will it be ok? [image of single Peyote cactus with a bite taken out of it, clearly made by the two front teeth of a lagomorph] “I've recently been given a bunch of williamsii babies, and they live on a windowsill next to a table where my rabbit likes to sit and look at the street like a cat. There's usually a strong barrier between them, but last night I took it off so I can do some work on the table. Forgot to put it back and noticed a chunk is missing from one of the peyotes this morning! The rabbit seems fine, she was just very anti-social last night and went to bed early without snuggling with me. We have an appointment with a vet in a few days. I'II ask about my fur baby then. But on to my green baby, is it going to be ok? l've sanitized the wound, but it looks dried already. There are deep teeth marks that I've just sanitized and left alone. Should I cut into them to clean it? I'm an experienced plant parent, but a cactus noob.”
Post on r/dollarama “Don't let your kids put their mouth on these... I was witnessing a bunch of teenagers farting into them. I figured that this is not behavior limited to teenagers at my store. stop tooting these horns unless you wash them first! People are gross!”
Reddit post: image shot from a row of theatre seats of the person in front of them in London’s West End. The woman in front of the photographer is drinking soup straight from the can. It’s unclear what kind of soup it is. It’s sort of beige and the label has peas and carrots on it. The text of the post: Theatre etiquette? Thoughts on someone eating (drinking) soup out of a can during a show? It has stinked the area up Looking forward to seeing Paddington regardless!
Image of a Nestle Crunch Bar. The word CRUNCH is massive and there’s crack lines between the N and C as though the word was dropped from a great height onto the label.
A bunch of drops made of glass
Abra, a grey tabby cat with green eyes, peers out from inside a big paper takeout bag. What could she be thinking?
“r/druggardening My MIL took cuttings of my E. Novo for a flower arrangement. Trying not to be mad” The image shows an attractive handmade bouquet of flowers (fuscia roses, baby’s breath, and some small pink and purple ones that I don’t know what they are I’m sorry) as well as a lime green sprig of foliage from an erythroxylum novogranatense, a flowering shrub whose leaves contain high levels of cocaine. The bouquet is looking beautiful in a plastic cup filled with chilled water and it’s sitting on the fake dark wood grain of a tray in what’s clearly a hospital room. There’s a sliver of a huge insulated mug on the left side of the tray. Is it a sympathy bouquet? Congratulations for a baby? We will never know.
a left hand clasps a desiccated squirrel tail. the hand’s thumbnail is painted pink. the tail kind of looks like a dried seed head I guess
A vandalized public sculpture of the character Paddington Bear seated on a public bench. The head and front half of the hollow statue have been broken away, leaving the back of the statue remaining on the bench like half of an egg shell. The interior of the statue is unpainted.
perfectly graspable potato
the dreaded white hand gripping a yellow Yukon Gold potato, the most famous potato ever bred in Canada. it has been held in high esteem by famous chefs across North America for more than 50 years due to its buttery flavour and smooth, creamy texture. left grip alpha configuration
Coffee mug with a white body and black handle. The first two paragraphs of the Wikipedia summary of “Mr. Bean” is written on the mug in small text set in Optima.
What if Hitler had been Woke: Dismantling Racial Prejudices: A Stand Against Anti-Semitism Yaniv Tinstein (0) Aug 03, 2023 $39.95
A white-haired old woman with a blank expression in a white nightie inexorably walks across the quad of a college campus towards us
An ad on reddit.com that reads: "This free book focuses on the fall of the United States and the soon coming events that will unfold with it. You need to know what’s going on so that you can be prepared before these events begin!" There's a small thumbnail of the book's cover which features a bald eagle being strangled by a banner reading "e pluribus unum" with arrows scattered at it's talons.
Theo Faron, a former activist turned cynical bureaucrat, witnesses the coffee shop he just exited be blown up by a terrorist bombing, immediately after learning about the death of Baby Diego (the world’s youngest person.) And the explosion makes Theo drop his coffee, too! What a bad start to his day.
Football player Billy Cole uses his Beretta 84F "Cheetah" to shoot opposing football players. It’s raining heavily. A still from the film “the Last Boy Scout” (1991)
The largest faces of two 2 litre Tetra pack cartons of Natrel 2% milk are tilted towards the camera while resting on the top of a large skid of other milk cartons. The boxes are both blue and black. One shows a Santa Claus (in blue suit) clutching a glass of milk and looking directly into our eyes. The other has a minion (the one with one eye and the goggles) holding the glass of milk instead of a Santa Claus. They’re framed at identical sizes. They’re nothing looking right at you. The milk is certified by the Diary Farmers of Canada!
Through a wooden lattice and a restaurant window, behind a huge white truck, and being witnessed by a family, the apex of the first Cybertruck in this part of southern Ontario is ruining my life
Ćele Kula, a square stone monolith embedded in nearly a thousand Serbian skulls created for the Sultan of Turkey in 1809 following the battle of Čegar Hill. This is a black and white drawing of it with a wooden pergola over it supported by four posts. The entire structure is surrounded by a little picket fence and there is a big black spooky leafless tree looming behind and to the right.