Performative Competency

@machetemonkey.bsky.social

313 Followers 880 Following

Hello. I’m a real person, and as a real person, I’ve made some humorous observations about real life. Minneapolis, MN (He/Him)

Screenshot of a phone lock screen with a temperature readout of -15 degrees Fahrenheit. Below the temperature, a label saying “Extreme Cold Warning” appears, but it cuts off so it simply reads “Extreme Cold War…”
Dual-image meme. First image is a screenshot of a headline saying “Henry Rollins and Ian Mackaye join forces for new project” Second image is a screenshot from The Simpsons showing Homer opening the door to a group of neighbors, apprehensively saying “uh, this isn’t going to be spoken word, is it?”
A photo of the stage setup for Rilo Kiley at the Palace Theater, taken from the very back row
Nine Inch Nails performing a cover of David Bowie’s “I’m Afraid of Americans” on stage at the XCEL Energy Center
Red box of Cap’n Crunch cereal
Movie poster for “The Cider House Rules” with Michael Caine, Tobey Maguire, and Charlize Theron’s faces
Tapes n Tapes — Walk It Off
Screenshot of a “technical difficulties” splash screen from The Critic. Shows an old-timey art style of a Penny Farthing bike with the titular character’s face in the large wheel. Text reads “Wheel be right back”
Two smiling pajama-clad humans on a leather couch in a finished basement, with one cat curled up in the background
Screenshot from The Simpsons showing a novelty restaurant storefront that says “TGI McScratchy’s Goodtime Fooddrinkery”
Donnie Darko “imaginary friend” meme template. Panel 1: “Ilhan Omar ignored me” Panel 2: “Ignored you, or gave you an answer you didn’t like?” Panel 3: “Gave me an answer I didn’t like”
Screenshot of an AXS confirmation screen for a ticket purchased to see The Hold Steady at the 7th St Entry
A brick arch built into the old town walls over a street in Derry, Northern Ireland
Screenshot from the r/Soundbars subReddit that shows a dirty soundbar speaker screen with the thread title “Meatball smashed in my Sonos Arc: How to clean?”
Screenshot of two replies from a scam account pretending to be “Bill Emory management team” (content of replies is not particularly important; just obvious generic spam text)
Zoomed-in image of a billboard in Northeast Minneapolis that shows a guitar compressor pedal with the text “Clean: the creative compressor, made right here in NE Minneapolis!”
A band on stage in front of a crowd. Guitarist on the left, drums in the middle/back, and shirtless bassist/singer on the right. Two psychedelic banners frame the band logo (High on Fire). Lighting is purple and blue
Get to know my music taste For every like, I will post one song I love
A close-up crop of the previous post, showing an arrow pointing to “2 likes”
A close-up crop of Bluesky’s “heart” icon at the bottom of one of OP’s posts, with 1 heart received
Screenshot from The Simpsons. Homer sits on the couch, saying “ah the Luftwaffe, the Washington Generals of the History Channel”
A shelf with a 20-serving container of Flintstone’s Cocoa Pebbles-flavored ISO100 Hydrolyzed whey protein powder
A gray, brown, and white tuxedo-ish medium-haired male cat, laying on his back with his tongue hanging out
Rapper Nur-D performing at Mn Orchestra Hall, with the hall lit up in rainbow colors with disco ball reflections
A man wearing a red and cream outfit with “W Emerson Av” on one arm and “W Lake St” on the other, as well as a giant red foam cowboy hat dressed with led lights that says “Arby’s Roast Beef Sandwich is Delicious”
Martin Prince with caption “spare me your euphemisms. It’s fat camp for daddy’s chubby little secret”
Simpsons screenshot of Lenny with caption “Hey, I’ve only been here a few minutes. What’s going on?”