Michele one L

@michelehowarth.com

488 Followers 320 Following

Bridge burning grudge bearer. BuyMyFuckingBook™ direct from www.michelehowarth.com Instagram @wernerherzogmeets https://buymeacoffee.com/michelehowarth

My poster in the window of the pizza parlour that said BUY MY FUCKING BOOK has had the word fucking covered by a folded piece of paper.
A screenshot from Audible of my novel Glitterballs, narrated by Stephen Hogan.
A black and white photograph of Eric Morcambe and Ernie Wise on the beach in Blackpool. They’re seated in deckchairs and are wearing white shirts and have their trousers rolled up. Ernie’s tie is slackened. You can see the Blackpool tower in the background along with an advert for oysters.
An empty room with brown patterned carpet and a wood burning stove. One wall is painted blue, the other is wallpapered. There is a piece of wood fixed to the wallpapered wall and three large red/brown stains trickle down underneath it.
Three yellow le creuset pans being advertised on a giveaway site.
An estate agent’s photo of a toilet that appears to be covered in poo.
Two grey Korat cats - one with its back to the camera, the other walking straight towards it.
A ceramic table lamp base in the form of a small black and cream terrier type dog, with black spotted lampshade.
My grandmother and grandfather are sitting in deckchairs,behind a red striped windbreaker. My grandmother is wearing a pink coat, court shoes a beret and white earrings. She has a large white handbag next to her. My grandfather is wearing a suit and tie, socks and brogues. He appears to have a coat draped over the back of his deck chair.
From under the table you can only see the hairy short legs of my dog as he walks back and forth on his hind legs, looking for something on the table.
The window of a pizza parlour is covered in various flyers and posters for events, including one that says BUY MY FUCKING BOOK along with a QR code for buying my novel Glitterballs.
A baby jackdaw with a cocked head looking straight at the camera.
An Estate Agent pic of an opulent sitting room, with a deep red theme. It has ruched red velvet curtains with tassel fringing - the ceiling has been covered in gathered red fabric also. The walls are wallpaper in red damask with a floral border. There are Victorian dolls, a parasol and many knickknacks.
Bruce Mitchell wearing a green velvet fez, a monocle and a badge that says BIRTHDAY WANKER.
A screenshot of Glitterballs on the bookshop.org to site.
A grey and a white pigeon are together in a crate en route to their new life at a bird sanctuary.
A small terrier type dog runs through long grass towards a stone cottage. The landscape is expansive and green.
Vintage table lamp of an elegant woman in a pink and black lace dress, casting a shadow.
A child’s pavement drawing in chalk of a creature holding up their arms. A slice of pizza in one hand and a McDonald’s fries in the other. On the T-shirt it says ‘I heart food’. A small terrier type dog with a yellow harness is also in frame.
A shadow of my dog that looks very much like Muttley from the Whacky Races children’s TV series.
A grainy black-and-white photograph of the comedian Tom Cooper.
A free outdoor library has three books on Cliff Richard and an Andrew and Fergie royal wedding album.
A mass of brown horse hair.
Mick Head, standing behind a small terrier type dog called Herzog.
A seemingly abandoned farmhouse kitchen. A wooden chair is alongside an old stove with a kettle on it. There are black soot marks up the wall.
A small plastic figurine of St Thomas.
A motorhome is stopped at temporary traffic lights. The back door has a cartoon of a happy couple which says JOHN AND PAT LIVING THE DREAM.
A table on a train with a banana skin, four buttons and Umberto Eco’s ‘how to spot a fascist’ book.
A copy of a message that says: ‘Err it went well I think. He’s a miserable cunt like chain smoked talked a lot of shite slagged everyone off his set was shite got loads of grief.’
A 1980s press photo of the actress Valerie Harper wearing a bright red skirt and yellow blouse, red strappy heels and a red scarf tied around her head.
A single frond of pampas grass can be seen above a tall hedge that borders a handsome Victorian villa.
A black Labrador and a small terrier type dog sit together on a rock in a field full of dandelions.
An old newspaper cutting of two fake nit nurses cutting DJ Martin Kelner’s hair while he holds a ceramic urinal.
A black-and-white photograph of Bruce Mitchell is being measured up for framing, next to a framed photograph of Tony Wilson.
A table display of fiction at Waterstones with Buy My Fucking Book bookmarks added by me.
Muscley men in tight fitting uniforms, showing a lot more bare chest than Captain Mainwaring.
The back of a photo with the wording NO IDEA WHOSE WEDDING THIS WAS OR WHO MOST OF THE PEOPLE WERE.
A still from The Producers of Gene Wilder saying ‘I’m hysterical and I’m wet’.
A screenshot from the Huw Edward’s drama that shows a woman putting on her lipstick while walking along the pavement.
A small terrier type dog is perched on a chair in a room with four other people – he is howling with delight. There are a lot of takeaway cartons on the table.
Two grey Korat cats, sitting beside each other in the sun.
An eBay order form for a Mick Hucknall mask. £5.29.
Two women sit on a bench in Howth, Ireland 1959. They are dressed in fab 1950s outfits - especially a black skirt adorned with large pink hats. They have a beautiful pram next to them. It looks like it was a perfect day.
Sarah Jane Morris sits smiling, wearing a purple checked dress. Werner Herzog, a small terrier type dog, sits next to her looking like he’s taking the gig very seriously.
A photograph of a group of boys taken in 1952 on a school trip to the Isle of Man. They include Peter Sissons, John Lennon and Jimmy Tarbuck.
A black T-shirt with white writing that says STOP GOING ON ABOUT THE HACIENDA. In the background, you can just make out a drug rep merch Prozac mug.
A podiatrist sits slumped, clutching my foot.
A Keighley News headline that says SHOCK AS SNAKE FALLS FROM THE SKY IN HAWORTH.
A photo of Rula Lenska walking behind a large sundial sculpture. All you can see is a hand and a wisp of her trademark red hair.
A large abandoned mansion, built 1740, on the market for €795,000, in Waterford, Ireland.
Someone’s living room. There are very chinz curtains with a ruched pelmet. An ornate guilt mirror sits above a flame effect fire with a wood surround. The leather sofa and armchairs or a orangey tan colour and there’s a green draylon armchair. The wallpaper could be 1970s but it’s the carpet that I love. A black background with a floral ribbon design throughout.
A bedroom is painted a very beautiful pink. The eye down is the exact same colour. The blue carpet is a bit of a disappointment but everything else is just lovely.
A flock of pigeons are packing the ground in the background, while a pig in the full ground is eating a carrot.
Too healthy looking young pigeons, one with black speckled wings and the other with a lilac hue.
An abandoned mansion with no roof sits alone in extensive grounds framed by two trees.
A post apocalyptic model village is dismantled and taken away in the back of a truck.
A small terrier type dog is peeping around a slightly open door. He looks apprehensive
A black-and-white cat with a moustache and centre parting is sitting on my knee. You can see many white cat hairs on my dark grey corduroy dress.
Saul Adamczewski seated next to a small terrier type dog who is holding a large spongey carrot.