Matthew Garrett

@mjg59.eicar-test-file.zip

11077 Followers 144 Following

Former biologist. Actual PhD in genetics. Security, OS security teaching at https://www.ischool.berkeley.edu. Blog: https://codon.org.uk/~mjg59/blog Signal: @mjg.59 He/him Opinions expressed here are mine, not my employer's

Screenshot reading "Andy Burnham pledges to end rough sleeping in first speech as prime minister"

A three panel tapestry in the style of the bayeux tapestry, but referencing the Softbank goose value slides. First panel is a goose with three golden eggs in front of it titled "Goose was not valued". 2nd panel is a basket titled "Eggs do not lay eggs". Third panel is a goose filled with medieval looking little guys titled "The true source of value: inside the goose".

The first two panels included small pictures beneath of a goose holding a knife. The third panel contains a small picture of a spider.

Screenshot of text reading:

"Kevin Spacey is probably a good guy, but it makes me nervous that he might have secrets"

Screenshot of text reading:

"Investigators are considering whether leftwing, anarchist and single-issue terrorism (LASIT) played a role on the suspect's alleged motivation, but are keeping an open mind as new material emerges"

A Buzzball spherical ring pull cocktail with cover art resembling a football and "ENG" printed on it. The ball is white and the text red, representing England's flag colours. The flavour is described as "Pip pip punch" and descriptive text describes it as a lemon tea cocktail.

A view through a hotel room window overlooking the concourse at St Pancras station in London, with a view of two Eurostar trains parked for the night

Rainbow lasers illuminating a cloudy sky over San Francisco, above local city buildings. The lower right of the picture contains weird purple reflections from inside the room.

A captcha titled "Click on every object built to produce music". The pictures include two violins, a cymbal, a desert, what looks like a fucked up dog lying on grass, and four helicopters

Screenshot of text reading:

"Directions are according to traditional Montreal map where downtown (example, rue Sherbrooke) is east-west, with Mont-Royal to the north and the river to the south. "North" on the Victoria bridge is actually south-west."

Deep Space 9 title slide, with the episode title "Big Shoes"

A title screen for a Deep Space 9 episode. The title is "O'Brien's shoes are too big"

The inside of the first turn at the Circuit Gilles Villeneuve in Montreal. The grassy area contains multiple geese who appear entirely unconcerned by the two bright yellow Formula Two cars passing them at high speed.

A wall with a framed poster for Hackers (1995) next to a Robert Tinney print of a DNA double helix except one strand is a rainbow coloured ribbon cable

Youtube comment reading:

"6:55 this guy drinks Buckfast out of a teapot"

Screenshot of text reading:

"Speaking to journalists as he arrived at the count, Goodwin blamed his loss on “a coalition of Islamists and woke progressives” he said had “come together to dominate the constituency”.

He accused the Green party of “playing sectarian politics,” in part by writing to constituents in Urdu: “This kind of campaign, in different languages appealing to specific groups based on their characteristics, is unacceptable in modern Britain”.

Asked whether he was claiming the result was illegitimate, he did not respond as he was whisked away."

A hearse. In the window is a plastic gravestone with the text "See you soon"*

A Pixel Watch 4 on an arm. A voice asks the watch what time it is. The watch face prints the text "It is currently 12:17:20". A synthesised voice from the watch says "It is currently twelve five twenty".

A sinusoidal graph. The x axis is labeled Time (Days/Weeks). Every number on it is "10". The y axis is labelled "Alignment with Virtue or Action Quality", and is numbered -50, 0, 1, 0, 1, 100, 150. Many of the data points on the graph have vertical lines between them, but frequently have other points. The others have vertically aligned points with no lines between them. It is not explained whether these are confidence intervals. It is unclear that the graph line is a best fit, but it's hard to tell given the y axis makes no sense.

A slider for setting the tip on an online order. It is at around 40% of the length of the range and displays 20%.

Screenshot of a section header reading "Ableism" with the section contents just being the word "Soon" in italics

A two frame meme, vertically arranged. The top frame is Manny from Black Books saying "I'm looking for the little book of" and underneath is Captain Kirk from Star Trek II shouting "KHAAAAAAAAAAAN"

A vending machine containing multiple different flavours of Tayto crisps (Northern Ireland version)

A TV (Samsung's The Frame) mounted to a wall and displaying the artwork of the Enterprise from Star Trek: The Next Generation that hangs in Picard's ready room

Tracking information for a package, showing an expected delivery date of the 5th of December. At 1:19PM it is shown as out for delivery. At 5:32PM it is shown as having been loaded on a vehicle. At 5:42PM it is shown as out for delivery again. It is not shown as having been delivered.

Achewood strip from 2006-12-15 (https://achewood.com/2006/12/15/title.html). Ray sits in a chair across a desk from Lyle. In the first frame, Ray says "The way mom tells it, Rustmouth was a bitter man, soured on beer, and given to claims". Lyle replies "Like what?". In the second frame, Ray says "A few scholarly works state that he claims to have had the first group sex in America - though recently unearthed wax recordings have him saying he didn't much like it. Here, I have 'em on my IPod." Ray reaches into his desk, creating rustling noises. In the third frame Lyle wears headphones and listens to a recording with hisses and pops which says "Group sex? Yeah, I tried it. Twice. Can't stand it. All that commotion. Dear lord spare me from that awful group sex."

Screenshot of text from and English High Court judgement reading "In a later social media post in 2018 on Twitter (X), he was involved in a game of listing criteria for electing a new prime minister, in which he proposed ‘1. Cancel Brexit; 2. Decriminalise most drugs; 3. Spend less on candles [an internet meme]; 4. Resign’."

The ad hoc committee’s assessment is that Matthew Garrett meets the bar of excellence.
We commend him for his strong engagement with students, his command of the subject matter,
and his effectiveness in leading classroom discussions.

An led display on the side of a train, reading "This train terminated her" as it is not wide enough to display "This train terminated here"

An android wifi config tile showing I'm connected to a network called GBUS

A Thinkstation SFF PC on top of an HP SFF PC on top of a VCR, all on top of a hardwood floor. Also on top of the VCR is an Edgerouter X and a shit load of network cables.

An INS agent holding a gun pointed towards two scared individuals hiding in a closet, one adult, the other a child. The child is Elián González.

A bus stop advertisement for Delve reading "Today, SOC 2 is done before your AI girlfriend breaks up with you"

Screenshot of text reading "No results found for 'desperado der bits und bytes'"

Back cover of a book. German text reads, in large characters:

"Es gibt kein Recht oder Unrecht. Es gibt nur Fun oder Langeweile"

Underneath it continues:

"Dade Murphy ist ein Surfer auf den Wellen Der Datennetze, ein Desperado der Bits und Bytes - Dade ist ein Hacker"

Photograph of a book with a picture of Joey from Hackers sitting behind a table being interrogated by secret service agents. This does not appear in the film.

A phone box door, covered in an advert for Foster's Rocks, a "Lager with rum flavour". The tagline is just "LAGER MEETS RUM"

Me, staring at the camera, with four other people around me, in front of a hedge. The faces of the other people have been removed for privacy reasons. One of them has a stack of plastic cups sitting upside down on top of his head.

Screenshot of a headline from Teslarati titled "Tesla Robotaxi is headed to New York City, but one thing is in its way"

Screenshot of a Mastodon thread. Someone says:

"@mjg59 "Secure" (restricted) boot = Your computer will only boot things microsoft decided to, And you can't modify them."

I reply:

"? This is demonstrably not true"

They reply

"Are you sure?" and link to the Secure Boot subsection of the Wikipedia article on UEFI

I reply:

"You might want to compare my name to the name associated with the citations there"

A Sysco branded semi truck parked on Valencia Street in San Francisco in the hatched off area demarking the road and the bike lane. Underneath it is a bent forward flexible bollard.

A white Waymo in an art wrap showing a Black woman wearing pink sunglasses surrounded by green leaves

Screenshot of text reading:

'Ringland said songs such as Get Your Brits Out by Kneecap – “Brits out” was an IRA-era slogan – elided the British identity of many people in Northern Ireland. “The kids think they’re being edgy but edgy was being in the police, which meant you could get a bullet through you.”'

An open can of Cutwater Tiki Rum Mai Tai. It claims to be "Made with award-winning real spirits", and is a "Mai Tai made with white rum, barrel aged rum and natural flavors"

Picture of the outside of a shop called "Computer Zone"

Stephen Fry wearing a suit and carrying a small tray with a martini glass on it, playing Jeeves from Jeeves and Wooster

Screenshot of a dialog from Twitter. It says:

"Messages are now fully encrypted

End-to-end encryption: messages are end-to-end encrypted across all your devices.

State-of-the-art privacy: There's no way for anyone, including X, to read your messages.

Set up a passcode: In order to secure your messages, you'll need to set up a 4-digit passcode."

Bill Gates from 2001 staring towards the camera, holding a cheeseburger in one hand, and an xbox controller smaller than the original US/EU controller in the other

A postcard depicting the exterior of a large railway station, built in the Mission Revival style, viewed obliquely.

A Key System train travelling along train tracks on the lower deck of the San Francisco Bay Bridge, with two vehicle lanes on one side

A storefront with a sign reading "Bosko's Gallery"

Screenshot of https://x.com/dril/status/205052027259195393, a tweet by dril reading:

"IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL"

Screenshot of text reading

"To open the falcon wing doors in the unlikely situation when Model X has no power, carefully remove the speaker grille from the door and pull the mechanical release cable down and towards the front of the vehicle. After the latch is released, manually lift up the door.

Screenshot from Wikipedia's page on the Lexington Branch railroad in Boston reading:

"In 1980, a federal judge ruled that the Lexington Branch must be restored after construction of the parking garage at Alewife station over the right-of-way.[24] In 1981, the MBTA entered into an agreement with the Town of Arlington to advocate that the Lexington Branch be abandoned. In return for the MBTA's support for converting the railroad to a bikeway, Arlington allowed the MBTA to use some of its land as a construction staging area for the Red Line extension project."

Screenshot of an eBay advert. The top right corner is a woman in a red blouse and black skirt standing in front of a pink wall. The bottom right is what appears to be a model steam train the left half is what appears to be an automatic pistol with a stock and large magazine. Underneath is the slogan "Complete your collection"

Screenshot of Google "Search Labs | AI Overview" output reading:

If the "T" line appears on a rapid test (like a COVID test) before the "C" line, it usually indicates an invalid test because the "C" line (control line) should always appear first, confirming the test is working properly; if the "T" line appears without the "C" line, the result cannot be trusted and you should retake the test.