Marc Sparks

@msparks.bsky.social

199 Followers 182 Following

Protecting norms includes continuing to talk about silly stuff while being acutely aware that the world is on fire.

World's bumpiest meatloaf, world's bumpiest mashed potatoes, and world's bumpiest...biscuit?
The AI meatloaf again, this time with a red line tracing the curvature of the plate. The price label is covering a small portion of the plate, but the edges don't line up on either side of the label.
Obviously AI flyer for meatloaf, but everything has way too many bumps, including "creamy" mashed potatoes and some kind of weird biscuit/roll thing.
David Deloise, maybe?
Screenshot of a Google AI search for a literary quote that was mistaken for a literal demand. Then, the Uber bitchy response explains "How to Get Ham."
Screenshot of a search for the literary quote "a piece ham". The AI incorrectly adds the word "of" and then mentions a Jack London story that does not exist.
Screenshot of multiple source pages containing the words "a piece ham" correctly attributed.
Screenshot of a successful search showing the correct source of the "a piece ham" quote, Bernard Malamud's "The Assistant". However, the quote shown is wrong, as it corrected the grammar.
Screenshot of a Google search for the literary quote "...put in my mouth a piece ham...". There is a slight typo, resulting in instructions on how to "Eat Ham Safely".
A screenshot of a Google search for the literary quote "... put in my mouth a piece ham..." The AI result explains that it can not feed me real food, and then suggests a ham recipe.
A whole cherry pie smashed on the ground in the Trader Joe's parking lot. One section of crust is weirdly intact and separated from its delicious filling pile. Weirdly, there's no tin or box.
A flyer for a conservative mayoral candidate touting "no data centers in our neighborhoods". It looks like a comic book.
Just a bunch of fun, awkward photos of the late senator Mitch McConnell.
A mostly blue map of the US depicting Dear Leader's approval rating on 7/1/26. Even Texas and most of the South is light blue. Stay out of Wyoming, but that shouldn't be hard for most people.
Ritz cracker box diagram, explaining that the cracker sleeve can be reclosed by twisting, because the human race is beyond saving at this point.
A photo of Dear Leader standing in front of a sign that says "Become Ungovernable".
An envelope from AARP that says Happy Birthday.
A photo montage of the forgettable character Kennedy from Buddy The Vampire Slayer, along with the incorrect statement from Google AI that she was dating Buffy.
Hats Unlimited in La Jolla, CA.
Screenshot of Google explaining Burn Notice themed jokes and writing ones based on my residence, rather than linking me to the thing I searched for, because AI search is complete garbage.
Screenshot of a prop yogurt of the fictional "Brenner's" brand favored by characters on the TV show "Burn Notice".
Set of comments posted below a tech article: Comment:"Hello everyone.I'm a 14-year-old Chinese student. I suffer from severe anxiety that I might have posted "my classmate Jin Yuxi is a separatist." . All these worries are just my imagination. Sorry for any trouble." Follow up:"If you happen to see any comment saying that this person is a separatist, please know that it is not true. Thank you."
We Are Lady Parts
Doordash delivery picture with a young kid posing next to the bag, flashing a big smile and giving two thumbs up.
Phoenix New Times article headline: "Donald Drumpf prepares to ship Kari Lake out of the country." Her terrifying raccoon eyes loom at the bottom of the frame.
Picture of Rudy Giuliani on a hotel bed with his hand down his pants while a young woman leans over.
VHS copy of the film "Screamers" depicting "men turned inside out. And worse... They're still alive." (Famously, this movie is actually about hybrid fish/men and has nothing to do with "men turned inside out.)
Very long Tripadvisor review, too long to type it but here's the gist...this kid got blue candy stuck in her hair before her audition and the mom is blaming it on the hotel, because "her acting coach told us not to bring blue candy". Look lady, no one has ever said "don't bring blue candy" to anyone UNLESS THEY ARE CONSTANTLY EATING BLUE CANDY. CLEARLY YOUR KID FELL ASLEEP WHILE EATING BLUE CANDY. Anyway, this rant goes on for four pages and has dozens of bizarre specifics. Her kid sounds like a mess, and who can blame her with a mom like this.
A photo of my living room TV, a Samsung OLED. An episode of "For All Mankind" is on the screen. The TV rests on an Ikea cabinet. There are many cat toys on the bottom shelf. There is a small subwoofer in the lower right. My legs are in the foreground. Oh, and there's a four foot stick of butter on the subwoofer.
Rebecca Bunch asks Josh Chan to "Find out if it's possessive or plural."
Picture of a hotel hallway. There is a mirror on the wall and a heavy-looking table below it. The table is off center. There is a desk lamp turned on that partially blocks the mirror. On the right side is a phone. It looks like maybe there was originally a wider table and the reason it's off center was so the phone cord could reach. No one needs any of this. The mirror would look better on its own.
Google's AI response to my search for "chuppleslap" includes a product to assist with inverted nipples, and later brought up BDSM completely unprompted, all because I misspelled "chappalslap".
Message from a presumed scammer pretending to be Emmy Rossum, an actress I had never heard of but apparently was on 100 episodes of Shameless, so maybe I should ask them if they can get me William H Macy's autograph.
A TV ad selling a 50 cent roll of pennies for $9.95 plus shipping.