Natalie Alana Ashton

@natalan.bsky.social

7619 Followers 1039 Following

🚊 connecting disabled communities in the North (@transportforall.org.uk) 📚 writing about philosophy, knowledge, social media & social change (nataliealanaashton.notion.site) views mine, not my employer's. she/her.

the gorgeous, already described breakfast, sitting on a depressing landlord-grey kitchen counter top.
a game box depicting a very detailed illustration of an absurdly jacked, topless wizard, purple cloak and long blonde hair billowing in the wind.
illustration of a big chunky sloth shown next to a human silhouette for scale. it's over twice the human's height.
a little paper coffee cup with a hand-drawn illustration of a pigeon printed on the side. in the background is a sunny, view of a greenery, hills, and a blue sky.
a little yellow emoji guy reaching it's hands out and up for a floating drop of blood, with a thoroughly delighted expression.
the traffic warden from Threads (1984) who has bandages with eye holes covering the top two thirds of his face.
a life-sized miffy mascot, dressed as the girl with the pearl earring. she's holding her hands together in front of her very demurely, and her head is cocked slightly to one side.
a news update reading "Adam Sandler officiates Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce wedding".
a clay figure with pupil-less eyes and a surprised mouth, wrapped in a woven cloth.
a boardwalk across an underground lake, in a cave with stalactites hanging from the ceiling.
a maxibon icecream - one end ice-cream sandwich, the other end ice-cream coated in chocolate and nuts.
a painting by Francine Van Hove. a long limbed woman wrapped in a towel, with another towel on her hair, sits in a garden with her feet in a round, metal tray of water that's reflecting the sky. another woman stands by holding a large jug. there are towels scattered around on the floor. it's called "Les pieds dans les nuages", from 2006.
a row of pastel coloured chimneys poking out from behind a rose bush, behind a big stone gate post.
screenshots from mad max where immortan joe is stood with his hand on the big "waterfall on/off" switch, saying "Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you and you will resent its absence".
sean sitting a breakfast table in a georgian hotel. his face is hidden by a folded newspaper, as he's intently studying the crossword.
old tweet of mine: "sorry but your bus can't be that 'mega' if my hips don't fit into the seat".
a bowl of popcorn, choc pretzels, marshmallows, and gummy worms.
the sob emoji pointing accusingly.
my hand holding up a partially eaten nectarine, against a backdrop of an out of focus river shaded by green trees, and a muddy bank dappled with sunlight. the corner of the blue towel ive laid out is visible in the foreground.
two white swans on a sunny pond, flanking half a dozen grey-white signets. they look so soft and round, like little cotton balls.
a box of malai flavoured "Kulfi ice milk lollies" made with almonds and pistachios.
screenshot of a listing showing a piglet with a muddy, hairy snout. his name is given as Beautiful Kiwi (bordered with pig, kiwi, and blue heart emojis). he's 3 weeks old and listed for £200.
blue plate filled with crackers, crudités, cheese, hummus, relish, plus a lil bowl of fruit and a lil bowl of the weird 'tuna pate' my aunt used to make in the 90s.
two Spidermans pointing at eachother.
a tweet i posted years ago. 4 screenshots of a very bright orange/blue desert scene with fast cars kicking up dust. tweet reads "the desert race scene in Speed Racer (2008) is the spiritual prequel to Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)".
a slightly gothic-looking brick building with an industrial chimney. the lower third is covered in a red and white graffiti mural that kind of looks like flames.
email screenshot. It reads: "⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Dear Dr. Natalie Alana Ashton, I again recently reviewed your studies titled "Measuring the Self and Measuring the World," "Rethinking Epistemic Relativism," and "The Utility of Cardiac-Gated Computed Tomography in Diagnosing a Reverse Patent Ductus Arteriosus in a Dog with a Concurrent Intracardiac Right-to-Left Shunt." Your innovative work has drawn considerable interest within our academic circles and truly deserves broader recognition."
a man in jeans shouting at a tube station staff member and trying to force his way onto a train, which he is delaying by holding his foot in its otherwise closed doors. the member of staff replies "Ken Livingstone you should know better than this, what are you doing".
a young child sucking her thumb, lying in a sleeping bag on a trampoline in a garden.
4 unflatteringly shapeless dresses. one is literally printed to look like sacking material and has the word "potatoes" across the middle. (the others are a black and white flower print, a close up of baked beans, and what looks like a steak bake).
mirror selfie inside a prototype metrolink tram from 1990.
taylor looking to the side and sticking her tongue out in a "tee hee, i'm so crazy" expression, on stage at the eras tour.
Taylor in a maroon dress at the eras tour, strumming her guitar during Is It Over Now? and smirking EMPHATICALLY, right before making surprise song history by revealing a mash up with Out Of The Woods.
a graph titled "very steep hills" which shows a total elevation increase of 279ft and decrease of 276ft.
bluesky's status page. it shows an orange dot with the headline "Some systems down". Further text says: "We are investigating an incident with service in one of our reginos [sic]. We are experiencing further issues. We appreciate your continued patience"
illustration of a kitten screaming in fear as two clothed rats run a human-sized rolling pin along the length of his body, which is encased in dough.
a panel of 4 photos where Hideo Kojima and model Anok Yai are posing as though they're having a fist fight. Yai has a mock serious expression but is wearing an absurdly impractical garment from a photo shoot as she repeatedly 'punches' Kojima. Kojima grins and turns his head to play at being impacted by her 'blows'.
a tiktok still where a woman in a car has removed her sunglasses and is grinning at the camera is a flirty way. text above her reads "Stop talking dirty to me".
Da Share Zone "Hit da bricks" meme. A skeleton running away, with the text "JUST WALK OUT. you can leave!! work. social thing. movies. home. class. dentist. clothes shoppi. too fancy weed store. cops if your quick. friend ships. IF IT SUCKS... HIT DA BRICKS. real winners quit."
a plate of pancakes with the aforementioned toppings, and a mug of coffee.
Michael's quoted post, but I've covered the ending so it just says "Bit surprised to be told that philosophers agree".
a grassy field with a few trees, almost completely obscured by fog.
a little white dog curled up small in her bed, with her eyes closed.
Tweet by Jay Rayner (@jayrayner1), 26 June 2019. "There's a compelling suggestion tonight that Johnson's bus story was a) designed to stop us thinking about the £350 million bus lie and b) game the google algorithm. If you now search Boris and bus you get bloody cardboard. SO pls RT this link A LOT..." Link preview image is Boris Johnson standing in front of his campaign bus that says "We send the EU £350 million".
a birthday card depicting a very 'cute' (AI?) turtle with huge eyes, eyelashes, and a human nose. it's printed on shimmery paper and bedazzled.
Columbo talking to and petting his basset hound, who is reaching out of a car window. "Okay, I'm gonna put you in charge. You take care of the car. When I get back, if the car's okay, I'll give you another cookie. If the car's gone, I'll give you another cookie anyway, 'cause I love you.".
a wet pair of hands kneading bread dough. from the wuthering heights trailer.
paper Costa cup.
a bowl of rice and thick orange curry, garnished with diced spring onions.
A page from The Very Hungry Caterpillar showing that "On Saturday he ate through one piece of chocolate cake, one ice-cream cone, one pickle, one slice of Swiss cheese, one slice of salami, one lollipop, one piece of cherry pie, one sausage, one cupcake, and one slice of watermelon.".
screenshot of two of my old tweets. first tweet: what's cottagecore but with the sea. lighthousecore? i want that reply tweet: this tweet was inspired by me thinking "i wish i lived on an island" then realising that i do, but like the worst one.
two bowls of orange-coloured soup topped with lentil, spinach and feta, and two plates of lightly-browned buttered toast.
screenshot of a Google news notification. It shows a picture of a young, topless Cillian Murphy brandishing a metal pipe and grinning. The headline reads: Every '28 Days Later' Movie, Ranked.
Julian Bashir about to sip his drink, but interrupted as he approached from behind and an alien hand placed softly on his shoulder. A whole journey of emotions flicker across his face - some of them surely arousal.
a bowl of the NYT crispy gnocchi and sprouts, with bonus paprika 'chicken'.
screenshot of the reply to my original post. it reads: "no news from or about the US. contact with friends from the US allowed. ...question mark on media/entertamment. maybe i could watch stuff that's older than a certain date?" and ive highlighted the middle bullet to emphasise that i would still talk to friends.
a big bowl of green leeks and white beans, and a small plate with a couple of slices of buttered bread.
Richard Scarry's illustration of two anthropomorphised, clothed pigs standing snout to snout. it's labelled "kissing".
page from a Richard scarry book. a pig firefighter labeled "brave hero" is climbing a ladder rescue a cat from a burning building. the cat is labelled "beautiful screaming lady".