NewsThump

@newsthump.com

8715 Followers 167 Following

Topical satire from the UK and around the world. You're not supposed to believe what we write, you idiot.

An infographic of "The Cycle of Trump's Iran War", showing a circular set of statements in a never-ending circle, in this order: 1. Trump claims complete and utter victory 2. Trump claims peace deal has been struck and Strait of Hormuz is open 3. Iran denies a deal exists and bombs sites using a military that America insists 'has been totally obliterated’ 4. Trump bombs Iran after pledging to attack Iran with full weight of US military
An A5 ring-bound notebook on a man's lap, with a police badge that says "Grammar Police" on it, and the words "To Observe and Correct" underneath in the style of a police banner.
A man in a white T-shirt in a pub, on the left chest is a St George's cross, but through the horizontal line are the words "Football not Farage"
An empty-looking State Fair at Trump's Freedom250 event, with Cillian Murphy's character from 28 Days Later in the foreground.
A man in a blue T-shirt featuring a design with a melting 99 ice cream cone with a Flake, and the words "99 problems" in stylised text.
A man in a deep teal T-shirt is shrugging his shoulders at the camera. On the front of the T-shirt is a stylised design saying "Living my okayest life", with a star who is also shrugging.
A man is sitting in a beer garden with a pint in front of him. He is wearing a white "Beer Garden Survivor" T-shirt. The design features a beer garden picnic table and umbrella alongside the words "Beer Garden Survivor. Another round, another record", which accurately describes both the drinking and the climate.
A man in a plain white T-shirt in a pub is pointing to the left chest area of his T-shirt. The left chest has a St George's cross, but the horizontal part of the cross has the words in bold white text "Football Not Farage" embossed on top of it
A man in a white T-shirt with a simple design on the front depicting Delboy and Rodney from Only Folls and Horses, dressed as Batman and Robin per the famous episode of their sitcom, "Heroes and Villains".
A photo of a sweating man on a sweltering day. He is wearing a blue T-shirt with the text across the chest in bold white text saying "IT'S TOO HOT" but the "O" in hot is a picture of the sun like in a weather forecast.
A man at the Lincoln Memorial in a black T-shirt bearing the words "Team Algae" rendered in the style of the bloom that took over Trump's renovated Reflecting Pool.
A man on a miserable day in a Navy t-shirt. It says on the front in white capitalised text across two lines "Whatever this is I didn't voter for it"
A headline from the Independent saying Tommy Robinson is claiming to have been held at Heathrow under anti-terror laws after his return from Russia.
The front of a plain black T-shirt with an image of the moon and the Mandalorian and Grogu on a bike, with their silhouette flying in front of the moon across the treetops, in an homage to the famous scene in ET.
A tweet showing lots of Algae growing in Trump's renovated reflecting pool, and the test "Who would have thought it? A dodgy builder with multiple fraud convictions has done a terrible job renovating a pool despite it costing fourteen million dollars."
A photo of the UFC cage and roof on the White House lawn ahead of the UFC fight arranged there. It looks incongruous with the White House in the background.
A simple cartoon of two aliens in a spaceship looking at earth from the window of their craft. One says, “Why are we leaving? I thought we came here to make contact?" The other replies “, Did you not read the report? Look who they elected as the leader of the free world and made their planet’s first trillionaire.”
A plain black T-shirt lying on a wooden board, with a white picture of underpants, two pencils and a moustache in the style of Blackadder in Blackadder Goes Forth. Underneath in bold letters is the word "Wibble"
A photo of Declan Rice preparing to take a corner during England vs Costa Rica. The original photo of people watching the game pitchside behind a table with food and drink has been edited to show them instead participating in a hot dog-eating competition with a countdown clock saying 26 seconds left.
A man in a burgundy T-shirt against a white brick wall. The T-shirt has a design on the front in white, depicting a broom, and the words "Trigger's Brooms of Peckham. Est 1996. "As good as new, forever!" and the signature of Trigger, the character from Only Fools and Horses.
An artist's impression of gladiators doing battle in the Roman Colosseum.
An image of Lee Anderson tweeting a definition of "cold anger" and pretending "anger" (which Nigel Farage didn't say) and "rage" (which Nigel Farage DID say) are the same - despite them being entirely different emotions according to every dictionary on earth. The image explains Reform are trying to gaslight the nation into believing Farage called for "controlled uncontrolled anger" - an obvious oxymoron.