OwlSarcasm

@owlsarcasm.bsky.social

110 Followers 140 Following

She/her. AuDHD. Occasionally overly literal. In my defense, I'm an engineer.

A gray and white tabby kitten zonked out in the new squishmallow bed we bought today.
A large gray cat perched on the arm of a darker gray sofa. She is peering inside a large dog crate at the small kitten interloper.
A small grey and white tabby kitten, curled into a little ball, sound asleep.
A small grey and white tabby in a large dog crate. He is miffed and trying to climb out.
Jack, a grey and white kitten, sticking his head out of the wrist cuff of my son's sleeve. His shirt is orange and the kitten looks super comfy.
A picture of the Corinthian from Sandman with mouths in his eyes
Ash is available for adoption. She is a baby orange cat being held on a grey table. She is $199 and so cute. She looks sad in this picture.
A set of boxes. One is turned over and has cutaway sections that give it legs. It is nestled inside a larger box. A cat could easily get unto the cave it forms.
A close up of a child's face, with a sharp blue eye and the text "nope" across his forehead.
Three fresh biscuits with golden tops and fluffy layers. They are delicious.
A screenshot of an ad on Facebook. It has two polymer d20 dice. One has "fuck you" in place of the 20. The other has "fuck me" in place of the 1.
A purple plate on a cluttered ottoman I cannot stop piling things on. The plate has an appetizing array of carrots, broccoli, and aged cheese and a bowl of ranch to dip them in.
My brown, white, and black dog curled up in a blanket with my son. He barely survived homeschool today.
The grey and white tabby cat reaching under the instructions he was sitting on before in search of a nail or peg or something. He has not promised to give it back.
A child in a grey hoodie is studiously applying stickers to the main sail of the trimaran project he is building. A grey and white tabby is sitting on the instructions and watching intensely.
A 2 hear old shaded sable English Shepherd under a blue blanket. The blanket is sort.of wrapped around his head.
A honey-brown doh with big dark soulful eyes who clearly needs more pets and to share my peanut butter.
Ex: when you come home if you think about it would you reset the internet? It's running funny. Me: I'll tell it it's running funny and to pay more attention to proper form. Ex: ... Me: i mean, we wouldn't want to sprain the router. Ex: you're not as funny as you think you are. Me: yes I am. Ex: no you're not.
A rectangular quilt with a cream background and hexagons of various colors in groups scattered across the front. The corner is flipped down to show the backing.
A brown, white, a black English Shepherd. He is wrapped in a blue blanket and looking extremely needy.
A white cat sprawled out sleeping in a bright ray of sunshine.
A mostly white cat with dilute grey points who has curled up in a grocery bag. Her nose is poking out of one of the handles, proving she does not currently have a death wish.
A golden brown roast turkey sitting on top of a gas stove with a green Dutch oven behind it.
A white Ragdoll cat who has crawled into a plastic shopping bag and stuck her nose out of the carrying loop.
Two black, brown, and white dogs on a grey couch. One is curled up on the cushion and looks bereft. The other, much fluffier, one is looking at me over her shoulder. Before I called her name she was mournfully looking out the window.
A brown, black, and white dog taking up most of a loveseat and turning over so I can rub his belly.
A plastic replica skull with blacked out eye holes. The skull is wearing a sparkly rainbow tiara. It looks fabulous.
A small metal bear charm with movable arms and leg. It is missing one leg. I am going to hell.
A brown, black, and white dog has arrived on the couch to lick my arm and remind me that the work day is almost over.
A cup of coffee in a mug with owls on it. It has a lot of half and half in it, with a little foam on top.
A drawing of the universe space/time fabric with earth making a divot.
A penis tree. A tree with growths that look like penii. I wonder if this counts for Hog Friday.
An ewok from Endor. Definitely not a penis.
A middle aged white woman with long brown hair and hazel eyes. She is wearing a blue and white dress and looks a little tired.
A screenshot of an email offering me an AARP discount on dining. Confusingly, this is coming from astrology.com. Bonus: if I join now I can get a free 5 port charging system OR an insulated trunk organizer. What ever happened to good old toaster ovens?
A honey-brown dog laying on a wood floor looking mild and innocuous. Don't fall for it.
A white, brown, and black English Shepherd enjoying a vigorous ear rub.
A brown, black, and white English Shepherd looking off to the side where a morsel or crumb might have been left over.
A honey-brown dog with her nose in the forbidden trash.
A solid gray cat sitting on the arm of a couch looking at me expectantly. As though she wants a koala.
A one-eyed mostly white Ragdoll cat named Snowball. She has her precious crinkly ball by her paw and looks deceptively sweet.
A screenshot of a conversation between two totally normal, not deviant at all friends. Friend: I'm pulling my vacuum apart for a first cleaning, and dug up instructions to verify my instincts. Just came across "Step 1: Safety Fist," and verily, the mind doth boggle. Me: That was the b-side to the Safety Dance single Friend: You can fist if you want to? Me: You can leave those holes behind.
A brown and black and white dog laying down with his head on a squishmallow pillow.
A pancake mix quiche. It's golden brown and delicious looking.
The same black and brown down, now crowding my laptop on my lap.
A black and brown dog resting with his head on a soft squishmallow for a pillow.
Horse semen being poured into a specimen cup from a syringe. This is a totally normal thing to google.
A gray cat laying on schoolbooks on a darker gray couch.
A gray cat laying on schoolbooks. She and the books are on a darker gray couch.
A honey-browm dog with pleading puppy eyes resting her chin on my knee.
A brown, black, and white dog who has just figured our I am not sharing my dinner.
A brown, black, and white dog laying in front of a black cabinet.
A brown and black dog sleeping next to my grey couch.
A grey cat sitting in a laundry basket. We are both wondering what happened here.