rretrovertigo . Bbsky.So cial

@retrovertigo.bsky.social

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hortible rat bag

MS Paint-drawn blue and gold award ribbon labelled “FELL FOR IT AGAIN AWARD”
Cover of a magazine called Vampires: inside the myths and mystery. A vampire wearing a cloak with a huge collar stands in profile, trickle of blood oozing from their mouth. Additional headlines include: The truth about the Undead; Secrets behind the superstitions; History’s most famous bloodsuckers; How Dracula changed everything; 25 essential films to sink your fangs into.
A blue steam train named Gordon plunges forward into a marshy ditch because he fucked up
Dour looking Japanese macaque taking a dip in a hot spring
The Lionel Hutz business card meme captioned: CHICAGO TRIBUNE Accountability for people in power? No, corruption en masse!
It’s the Chumby, a tiny monitor in a friendly shaped box with padding and rounded corners. The screen displays an octopus-shaped logo with the word “chumby” in lowercase.
“Ain’t it funny how the factory’s doors close? ’Round the time that the school doors close? ’Round the time that the doors of the jail cells Open up to greet you like the reaper?” Lyrics to “Ashes in the Fall” by Rage Against The Machine
Clip from The Olden Days depicting Governor Frontbottom ride off on his horse for the last time. "Giddy up Penelope." As he leaves, the mud-diggers run in and celebrate with rapturous joy. "He's gone! He's gone! Governor Clenchy-bot's gone!" "Praise be to the Lord! Thank heavens -- HE'S GONE!"
A bald smiling man in a pink romper suit plays the drums. It's Matt Lucas as George Dawes from long-defunct quiz show Shooting Stars. He's a baby!
Security Officer Benry saying "mickey mouse loves his cast members and i'm sure he won't mind if i lock you two in the roof and you will miss your whole trip here today"
Three figures in brown robes address you: "You have fallen foul of the cabal and been transformed into an egg with hands and feet. Sucked in!" They are taking pleasure in your eggy misfortune.
photograph of donald trump in his little car talking on his little mobile phone. a post-it note on the window says "THE A/C IS OFF. HE HAS NO WATER. HE IS LISTENING TO HIS LEAST FAVORITE MUSIC."
Newspaper article from the Daily Mail, January 15, 1934. Headline “Hurrah for the Blackshirts!”, by Viscount Rothermere, owner of the Daily Mail.
marv from home alone 2 getting electrocuted so hard his skeleton shows
“3D - Meet a life-sized coyote up close” next to a picture of a 3D model of a coyote. An icon of a 3D cube sits in the top right corner of the image, to identify the nature of the media.
Adrian Ripburger at a podium announcing “…the Corley MINIVAN!” Behind him plays footage of some faux-futuristic shitbox pootling down a highway.
An extremely real news headline that very much hasn’t been spat out of a meme generator states: JD Vance’s internet alter ego revealed: “Wonderbread Guy”
Magic The Gathering card depicting Duke Nukem smoking a cigar. Card name: “That’s a lot of words…” Type: Enchantment There’s a logo on it that I don’t know what it means. Probably specifies the expansion or something. I don’t play this game. Effects: Spells that have more than 5 lines of text can’t affect you. Caption: “…too bad im not reading them”
The Mayoller threatens Hitoshi Matsumoto with his mayonnaise bottle, screaming “MAYO-NNAISE!”
Clip from The Town with No Name. The Bartender’s eyes narrow before sending a glass of beer down the bar. The Man fails to catch it and sorrowfully looks on as it careens off the end of the bar, making a wet smashed mess.
Quote from philosopher René Descartes: “who give a shit.” The full stop is important.
The cover of Strapping Young Lad’s “City”. A whole bunch of machine schematics on a dark background. On the whole, a perfect album.
It’s sickly Sam and he’s wearing a bowtie
A screenshot of the little Threads widget from Instagram. It saw fit to promote to me a post of some random unnamed busybody saying: “While we’re on the subject of problematic creators, I would high (sic) encourage thinking critically about Concerned Ape and Stardew Valley. We deserve better than a game” and the UI sees fit to let it ellipsis off into the ether.
Pope Francis hiding behind a big book instead of explaining the image
Large bear by tree with the caption BONSE
A dude with a bow tie conking themselves on the head with a mallet
Lyrics from Run The Jewels’ Kill Your Masters. “Can’t contain the disdain for y’all demons / You talk clean and bomb hospitals / So I speak with the foulest mouth possible”
Invader Zim having a miserable time while robot companion Gir sings the Doom song for six entire months.
A screenshot of Macintosh computer emulator M.A.C.E. running HyperCard. The current stack is displaying a stack decorated to look like a book. Page header on left page: "And I Quote:" Text on left page: "Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana." Button on right page: "Who Says?"
Bad photoshop of Bixby Snyder from Robocop, with his mouth flipped upside down and angry eyebrows drawn in. The implication is that he wouldn't buy that for a dollar.
An ape sitting down wearing sunglasses. Caption: “Guys will see this and just think ‘hell yeah’”
An assortment of tasty paint varnish
tweet from donald trump junior saying "i'm sad to announce, my father donald trump has passed away. i will be running for president in 2024."
Dennis Oppenheim's sculpture "Device To Root Out Evil" which consists of a scale model of an inverted church
Early Cuyler from Squidbillies
A humanoid robot hammering a sign into the ground saying “NO FUN ALLOWED”
A cat stepping onto the curb behind a parked car at nighttime. The photo has a slight radial blur giving the feeling of disorientation.
Wild Dog from Time Crisis blows up a clock tower with a remote detonated bomb while holding his hostage Rachel MacPherson in an armlock. Caption: “Just to be sure!”
Dialogue box asking “Do you like cats?“ and the buttons say “ok” and “ok”. There is a picture of a white cat in the middle. It smiles at you
A stretch Hummer with bright pink paint
a VERY angry cane toad