Michael Meir Saltzman

@saltzman.bsky.social

6251 Followers 1842 Following

Actor/Writer. Previously: Head writer / Fact Checker for Dropout’s Um, Actually… Jack Handey enthusiast. Yeah I was in that anti-Trump weirdo PSA.

Rough sketch that I have clearly erased and redone a lot of a woman’s head/face with bangs and a blank please let this end soon expression. It’s not very good but I’m tryyyying
Megabyte from Reboot with a speech bubble saying the quote post
Panel from Matt Bors’ legendary comic in The Nib of the “Gotcha Guy” in this panel it depicts a woman with a skeptical “are you kidding me?” expression holding an eyebrow as a very smug man makes finger guns at her and says “... You SAID ON AN iPHONE. HEH. GOTCHA.”
Photo of a collectible small white bird figurine under a leaf with a dewdrop. It’s real cute.
Famous Frank Frazetta art of shirtless Conan standing atop a pile of dead bodies with a naked lady clinging to his leg and a big sword. Nothing psychological going on here nope nope
The scene from The Abyss where the aliens freeze a tsunami in place as they decide to not wipe out humanity for our sins. Overlayed is the text PAUSA DE HIDRATACION
https://bambamramfan.github.io/ai-compass/ Your Al Compass YOU ARE... The Skeptic patron saint: Ed Zitron It's oversold, it's losing staggering amounts of money, and the harms are arriving faster than the value. You've done the math on the unit economics and it doesn't close. You are loud about this, prolific about this, and you suspect history will vindicate you. Impact: -0.2 Valence: -2.0 See all 30 archetypes → Review Answers Retake
And thinks he’s shielded from antisemitism for it when he’s really kind of practicing a secular Christian view
Jar jar bonks doing a cool dude thumbs up like we all love him for and do not find irritating with a speech bubble so he looks like he’s saying the quote tweet
Fine I’ll describe it but I’m not happy about it. Screenshot from the App Store of a gambling casino game of some kind full of horribly rendered AI slop imagery including a creepy jester who I think is supposed to be hot and has a hand for an elbow
Results of my online test that show: Your Results 81% Woke 19% Chud 45% Techbro 55% Neo-Luddite 59% Hopepilled 41% Doomer 88% Davos 12% Dubai YOUR CLOSEST MATCH: Zohran Mamdani Mayor of New York City (2026-present)
3 panel hand drawn comic that looks like it’s made by someone who is really really bad at art. Panel 1: A bear bunny bro dude talks to a bird with huge eyes and eyelashes Bear:You HAVE PRETTY EYES. Bird: Thanks Panel 2: The bear is now chewing on her eyes and the bird has empty eye sockets Bear: I consume them for I must have their beauty as a part of myself Bird: thank you Panel 3; The bear now has the eyes of the bird as his eyes. Bear: Now I realize the curse. My horrible hubris. Bird: yeah
Final boss of Shinobi for PlayStation 2. A kind of campy ninja sorcerer who steals souls and whose fight is complete fucking bullshit I’m getting mad just thinking about it. If he kills you during it he tells you that your own demon sword is talking shit about how much you suck. I hate him hate him hate him
Mickey from Rocky pointing his finger and lecturing hard to an offscreen Jerry who has attempted to put down his phone and stop posting for a moment
Lucy from Cyberpunk Edgerunners. Profile shot of an anime woman with hair cut in sleek lines the and colored shimmery blue in a way that feels deeply unnatural. She has two slots on her neck for microchips and a look of slightly judgmental suspicious curiosity.
John Hammond in Jurassic Park.
Seagull with its head thrown all the way back meme, the first half of a meme where it then throws its head forward with glowing red eyes and sings something intensely
Mondoshawan from the Fifth Element nodding
The ITYSL meme of a guy in weird prosthetic makeup saying “there’s too much fucking shit on me” but edited poorly with Woody’s face
Princess Peach enraged
The Gameboy start up scene but it says Game Gear Sonic Baybee
Black and white photo of the Commitments from the film of the same name
The original widely lambasted version of Sonic the Hedgehog from the first live action trailer where he looks less cartoony and more nightmare
Ramiel from Neon Genesis Evangelion. A crystalline perfectly formed gigantic geometric figure with perfect smooth shiny surfaces lookin kinda like a d8 sent from God to destroy us
Shitty pencil sketch I made of a woman looking kind of smug and janky
The doors from the Walking Dead that famous read “Don’t Open” on the left door and “Dead Inside” on the right but are structured so it kind of looks like “Don’t Dead Open Inside” It’s edited so it says “Don’t Eat Dead Dove” in reference to the famous Arrested Development joke and meme
One might object that demanding that activists and protesters remain peaceful in the face of violence wielded by state officials and right-wing groups is a double standard. Well, that's true. But it's always been true. That double standard is written into both the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution, documents whose references to "insurrections" included slave revolts. Americans have always been more tolerant of state and right-wing-vigilante violence— lynchings, soldiers firing at striking workers, the New York City police riot of 1992, the January 6 insurrection—than of violence from the left. That double standard is part of Americas political topography and cannot be wished or argued away. It can only be outmaneuvered.
The greatest delusion of all—one shared by both the would-be shooter and the president he targeted—is that violence is an expression of strength, and nonviolence a symptom of weakness. Now, I am not a pacifist. I do not believe that violence is always wrong. And I am not arguing that it is always ineffective. But the Trump administration’s greatest failures have been connected to its obsession with violence, and its opponents’ most dramatic victories have resulted from the organized and courageous use of nonviolence.
The Mother (MU/TH/R) computer from Alien. It is basically a huge ominous symmetrical room of blinking 1970s computer lights and a chair in the middle
Ramiel from Neone Genesis Evangelion. It looks like a mostly featureless giant floating polygonal object
Meme from Simpsons of a hand holding a newspaper clipping showing a picture of Grandpa Simpson shaking his fist at a cloud with the heading “Old Man Yells at Cloud”
He-Man logo changed to read: WHOOPS I JUST SPENT 2 HOURS RESEARCHING TYPEWRITERS INSTEAD OF WORKING
“They don’t know” meme with a bunch of ppl dancing at a party and a despondent guy in the corner saying “they don’t know I’m the pope”
Sphinx from Mystery Men
Norman Rockwell meme guy standing at a town hall about to speak the truth to power but also probably not
Cover of the PC game Thexder With the subheading “hyper dual armor” and a picture of the coolest robot that can turn into a jet to ever live
Famous meme from Trading Spouses of Perrin saying “it’s dark sided”
The Onion screenshot from 2012 with headline: “After Obama Victory, Shrieking White-Hot Sphere Of Pure Rage Early GOP Front-Runner For 2016”
Will Sennett @Senn Spud (Cognitive behavioral therapy enjoyer I just cut off in traffic Think positively. He is probably in a rush for a reason. Maybe he's late for a job interview. Maybe his wife is giving birth Me: I'm da king of da highway 1:26 PM • 12/1/22
Old Captain America meme where he’s staring off smugly and normally saying ‘no I don’t think I will’ but edited to say “eh, fuck it why not”
Screenshot from the game Day of the Tentacle which has a very 90s grunge-stoner coded guy who has time traveled to meet Ben Franklin, who is saying “now that was interesting!”
Screenshot of Sister Amalie from the game Pentiment edited so she is saying “Somebody talking about me?”
An inexplicably angry Fry saying “I already did” which is not a response that makes sense yet also demonstrates exactly what the professor is referencing
Dril meme edited to read: wint @dril ... turning a big dial taht says "I hate you and everything bad is your fault not mine” on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval like a contestant on the price is right
Guy standing up bravely Norman Rockwell meme
Rob Paul “it’s happening” meme transparently overlayed of a screenshot of the latest episode of a podcast: a crossover episode between if books could kill and maintenance phase
Marlon Brando in the Godfather petting a cat edited with a talk balloon to make it look like he’s saying the quote post
The guy in a rat suit from Beakman’s World because I think OP meant Mavis Beacon but said Beakman instead and either it was a very good fusion joke or a hilarious typo either way here’s a rat
Screenshot from Final Fantasy VI in the section where Mog and the Moogles protect an unconscious Terra from being attacked. It’s the part where they suddenly introduce new tactics and controls and you have no idea what’s going on and reload like 20x before doing it right because you’re 8 and what the hell why did the game rules change
Screenshot from the movie Independence Day of Will Smith lighting a cigar and saying “Welcome to Earth” after having just punched an alien in the face
The parking entrance at Universal Studios LA
Kermit the Frog in Muppets Take Manhattan wearing a mustache and fancy suit at a restaurant - an image more powerful than anything JKR has ever conceived
Tom Hanks in the Elvis movie saying “he’s white” like he just discovered fucking gravity
Zoom in of the only other place on the voting map that went Mondale in 84 - DC
A screenshot of when I was on The Pitt for literally 3 seconds - a performance many have called “revelatory” “an emotional tour de force” and “haven’t you been in LA for 15 years shouldn’t you be doing bigger roles or something?”
Dexter Deshawn from Cyberpunk 2077 sitting in his limo smoking a guitar and looking at us like “are u fucking serious right now” from the scene in the game where he explains his personal hobby is ONTOLOGY
Large paper protest sign. The top in black marker has a quote from George Washington’s letter to the first synagogue in America, “To bigotry no sanction, to persecution no assistance” Then in the middle it says “I would have written something meaner but my kids are here” The bottom has two big drawings. My 7yo drew the planet with people all over it surrounded by a rainbow and wrote “everyone should be together” above it. My 4yo drew a rainbow and hearts and had her sister write “rainbow love” above it.
The “they don’t know” dancing meme but with the old real player logo saying “they don’t know I had a music visualizer too”
“freedom of speech” painting by Normal Rockwell (which is a meme) showing a guy proudly standing up and speaking his mind in a town hall or something
The cover of the film A Beautiful Mind but I’ve poorly replaced Russel Crowe with myself