Scott Walldren

@scottwalldren.bsky.social

46 Followers 15 Following

Marketer by day, artist by night, creative always. Balancing SEO strategies and snack breaks like a pro. Fueling businesses with data-driven insights and family debates with dad jokes. Part strategist, part wordsmith, full-time fan of efficiency and humor.

Black-and-white cartoon of a frazzled man holding a crying baby, balancing a laptop, and surrounded by chaos—coffee spilled, papers flying, trash can on fire. Nearby, a calm woman texts, saying “Let me know if you need anything.” Caption reads: “Technically, they offered help.”

A black-and-white ink drawing of four people sitting at a restaurant table after a meal. The check is in the center. One person leans forward, calculating the tip in their head while casually eating. The others are fumbling with their phones, looking confused and frustrated, presumably trying to use a calculator app.

Google is Not a User
We crafted the site, pixel by pixel,
a cathedral of content,
blessed by keywords, baptized in alt text,
its steeples adorned with meta tags
that no one but the bots would ever see.
For Google, they said,
is the god who must be pleased.
It does not scroll.
It does not linger.
It glances with mechanical indifference,
ranking worth by its own calculus of power.

A napkin from Steak n Shake that says "Born on Route 66 in 1934" with a Route 66 sign.