Bicycles are humanity’s greatest triumph

@sjavik.com

438 Followers 547 Following

Father to 3 clever girls, husband to one more. I like bikes

Still from Don Hertzfeldt’s rejected cartoons featuring a big spoon
A foldable miter saw table on wheels jankily attached to the rear rack of a cargo bike like a pull-behind trailer that could only go one place: hell
A drawing of jar jar binks and Garfield combined. The creature has breasts they are lightly covering with their paws. The image has a frowny face reaction after being sent in a chat. Swyds2015:dysswyd deserves an hd remake
Cornelius Hawthorne from Community wearing an ivory wig and looking surprised, similar to the woman pictured
Wint @dril drunk driving may kill a lot of people, but it also helps a lot of people get to work on time, so, it;s impossible to say if its bad or not,
Welcome To The Onionati. Your Onion membership allows you to peel back the curtain and access stories that you always suspected to be true, but never had the proof. Now you do. For example: Does the 1% rule the world? Yes. Can you do anything about it? No. Will recycling help? Also no. Warning: the truths you will learn can make you seem unbalanced to the non-members but their opinions will no longer matter to you. Welcome to the Onionati. Contribution details: Date Received: 3/30/2026 Amount Received: $75.00
A card of Sheryl Sandbar, a character from the board game Class War published by Jacobin Magazine. Her description reads “I was back on the company zoom while they were still stitching up my C-section — what’s your excuse?”
A picture of a goat standing with its head in the corner
Pikachu from pokemon snap looking very satisfied after eating a fruit
A picture from Infowars of Alex Jones before and 45 days later. The context is that he was taking some kind of supplement. There is no discernible change except that he is redder in the 'after' photo.
Back to back skeets, the first being the one this is replying to, the second is a Corel clip art gallery of a hand washing sign
An exhausted, soaking wet middle aged man on an exercise bike in a gym. He is wearing street clothes because he told his daughter she could pick his workout clothes if she got dressed and went to school.
@dril post alan dershowitz once tried to defend me in court by pulling out a pocket pussy and insisting he would never fuck it. we lost the case 3:10 PM Jan 30, 2020
Early Garfield comic where he is smoking a pipe
Tweet from @dril CHIEF: dracula is in our sights. Take the shot! SNIPER: I can't, Sir. I'm Woke! ME (watching through binoculars): He's woke! He wont do it!
A scene from Knives Out where the detective says “ What were the overheard words by the Nazi child masturbatin' in the bathroom”
An opinion piece from The NY Times International titled “Give Trump the Nobel for Gaza, if he does the harder parts to come” by Thomas L Friedman
A 3d print of a character from the Onion political cartoons looking through a window. His shirt says "sickos" and he's saying "YES... HA HA HA... YES!"
A microsoft banner showing all the stuff they've done in the puget sound region spraypainted over with "MSFT KILLS KIDS" and other messages about their complicity in Israel's crimes against Palestinians
Breast-feeding of animals by women: Its socio-cultural context and geographic occurrence Frederick J Simoons, James A Baldwin Anthropos, 421-448, 1982 In this paper, the practice of women breast-feeding animals is viewed from a geographic and historical perspective. The principal aims are to establish where the practice has been commonplace, to determine its economic and socio-cultural context, to consider its possible role in animal domestication, and to weigh its significance in human ecology. — In many cases, the practice is an expression of affection for pets (among Polynesians, among forest peoples of tropical South America, and especially among aboriginal hunters and gatherers in Southeast Asia, Australia, and Tasmania). In other cases, affection is supplemented or supplanted by economic concerns, as among various Melanesian "pig complex" peoples. In some cases, breast-feeding of animals is linked to cult and ritual, an outstanding example being the nursing of cubs in connection with the Ainu bear cult. In a few cases, animals are breast-fed with the welfare of the human mother or child being of greatest concern. The conclusion is drawn that animal nursing may indeed have contributed to the
A dry erase marker labeled as “low odor” and “fine”
Ad from BECU showing that you can win $1,000 by shopping at PCC. PCC is widely cited as a place people met their spouse in the greater Seattle area.
A scene from Cyberpunk: Edgerunners. A boy and his mother are in a car crash. Private paramedics come quickly, but pass them over because they are not clients. One paramedic says “leave them for the city meatwagon.” Later, at the hospital, the doctor tells him his mother is stable, and that he must pay for the surgery within 3 days. He then gets a phone call and learns his mother has died, and that “there is only so much we can do on the budget plans”. He opts for the lower cost cremation option offered by the hospital and picks up his mother’s remains from a vending machine. Season 1, episode 1. Available on Netflix.
An Apple Watch notification of a text message saying “President Obama just issued a STERN WARNING for every American!”
Amazon listing with two alternatives with a man wearing a hat. One is “Dark gary” and one is “Light Gary”.
An electric road sign at night reading “can you smell what the rock is cooking”
Go off grid? Where would I get my meds, compression socks and corn removers? Adrian Chiles Am I just too fussy or too old? Either way I’m not cut out for a life in the wilderness
A still image from a scene in the film The Other Guys where a character is told about the many things that happened in his car while it was missing, including a raccoon birth
A photograph of large steel bollards during installation. Under the surface, which will be poured with concrete, is a large steel I-beam running towards the building and pedestrians the bollards will protect, opposite from where a vehicle attack would occur. These friends aren't going anywhere lol
A screenshot of a $15 donation to an animal shelter
@dril tweet another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it 8:27 PM · Feb 19, 2012
Lilo and stitch release date: June 16, 2002
A King County Library System branded card in English that says “Know your rights if you are asked about your immigration status” in front of a fact sheet from the National Immigration Law Center
Screenshot from the SNL sketch "Ted Brogan is Born", where Will Ferrell, a 37 year old man, is born from Rachel Dratch. Will is dripping in sputum and sauces and making a face like he's watching a rhinoceros eat a bowl of jello.
Microsoft banner advertisement vandalized to read “MSFT KILLS KIDS”
Excerpt from review of Pete Buttigieg's book by Current Affairs, linked above. These are indeed some of the impressions you might get setting foot in the Square. But there’s another fact about the world outside the Harvard gates that is instantly apparent to most newcomers: It has long had a substantial population of homeless people. In fact, it’s a scene as grotesque as it is eclectic: Directly outside the Corinthian columns of the richest university on earth, people wrapped in dirty coats are begging for a buck or two from passing students. Most of the university population has trained themselves to ignore this sub-caste, to the point where they don’t even see them at all, and Buttigieg is no different. The closest he gets is reporting “a mix of postdocs, autodidact geniuses, and drifters” at the Au Bon Pain. He doesn’t mention seeing injustice. Perhaps just an oversight, though every time I’ve passed through Harvard Square it has been my signature impression. But there was soon something even more disquieting. Talking about politics on campus, Buttigieg says: In April 2001, a student group called the Progressive Student Labor Movement took over the offices of the university’s president, demanding a living wage for Harvard janitors and food workers. That spring, a daily diversion on the way to class was to see which national figure—Cornel West or Ted Kennedy one day, John Kerry or Robert Reich another—had turned up in the Yard to encourage the protesters. Striding past the protesters and the politicians addressing them, on my way to a “Pizza and Politics” session with a journalist like Matt Bai or a governor like Howard Dean, I did not guess that the students poised to have the greatest near-term impact were not the social justice warriors at the protests […] but a few mostly apolitical geeks who were quietly at work in Kirkland House [Zuckerberg et al.]
A broken website with a banner saying my internet explorer is out of date
Title of an email from Google Gemini that reads "Help your children get ready to use Gemini Apps"
Scene from the tv show parks and recreation with a spoiled failson politician saying “give me it” over and over
A picture of 'mayor pete' buttigieg on the campaign trail eating a cinnamon roll in a way reminiscent of a mid-tier scavenger/predator mammal in the tundra biome
A character from the tv sitcom 30 Rock saying "Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name."
a hand-drawn image of someone crying and drooling with a tricycle growing out of their head
Screenshot of a plain website with text, a white background, and some pictures. Website advertises trophies and has an image of a trophy featuring lines and a trophy featuring hippos.
Onion magazine advertisement reading “send us money until the throbbing subsides”
A picture of a bunny, followed by a social media post with the bunny as the avatar that says “bnuy”
A person responds to a message that reads: If air quality was terrible and you had a propane furnace, wouldn’t you switch to that for the day anyway? The response is: No. I wouldn't.