Starfleet Press Office

@starfleet-command.bsky.social

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The Starfleet Press Office: multiple officers, one mission. Making sure you know what's happening in space, whether you want to or not. From medical tips to dolphin drama, we’ve got the galaxy covered from Spacedock One. https://linktr.ee/Stamets

A ship with the text 'Your Bullshit' on it flies towards the USS Discovery. The camera changes to the Discovery with the text Nope next to it, activating its spore drive and dropping away. The Discovery then falls into frame in a new location with the text 'Fuck Off' following soon after.
A screenshot of LosslessCut showing an episode of Star Trek Discovery being broken into multiple small clips
An image of the upcoming LEGO Enterprise-D model. The nacelle end caps are bizarrely smaller and have a thicker connecting base, giving it the appearance of a circumcised penis.
RIKER: Come in. Data, what's on your mind? DATA: Recent events have left me puzzled, sir. It has been days since Ishara left, and yet my thoughts seem to dwell on her. Almost as if I were experiencing a feedback loop in my mnemonic network. RIKER: I know what you mean. DATA: It is curious that I was so easily misled. RIKER: Make that we. DATA: Yes, sir. RIKER: Data, sit down. DATA: Thank you, sir. RIKER: In all trust, there is the possibility of betrayal. I'm not sure you were prepared for that. DATA: Were you prepared, sir? RIKER: I don't think anybody ever is. DATA: Then it is better not to trust. RIKER: Without trust, there's no friendship, no closeness. None of the emotional bonds that make us what we are. DATA: And yet you put yourself at risk. RIKER: Every single time. DATA: Perhaps I am fortunate, sir, to be spared the emotional consequences. RIKER: Perhaps. (Data walks back out into the corridor, and looks at the proximity chip that Ishara gave him)
A shot of a man walking down the street showing several Waymo self-driving cars either completely set ablaze or smashed and destroyed. In either case, they're all covered with graffiti. More fires burn in the distance. Fuck Waymo.
A box set of Star Trek Picard with a anti-theft device on the front. The device covers Picards face, making him look like Bane from the Batman series.
A screenshot of an Adobe After Effects window. Inside of it is a screenshot from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Picard is facing away from screen and Lwaxana Troi, sitting next to a ferengi named DaiMon Tog. She is gazing out with eyes of pure intense lust. Below here are the words 'Oh God I'm so horny'
Tom Paris, in Starfleet Uniform, looking vaguely disgusted at someone off screen.
A book of poetry titled Both Worlds by Jordan Hirsh
A quote from Douglas Adams saying "A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'
A four-panel meme from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine featuring Cardassians Garak and Gul Dukat. Panel 1: Garak, a Cardassian with ridged gray skin and a sly expression, wearing a green patterned tunic, turns slightly and smirks while saying, 'Ya' basic.' Panel 2: Gul Dukat, another Cardassian with pronounced facial ridges and slicked-back hair, dressed in a dark Cardassian military uniform, looks bewildered and asks, 'Is that a human insult?' Panel 3: Garak, still smirking and maintaining eye contact, confidently replies, 'Indeed and a devastating one.' Panel 4: Garak calmly adds, 'You're devastated right now.'" with a pointed expression, maintaining eye contact.
A screenshot showing billing information. It says the current balance is $277.40, the discount date is January 02, 2025 and the last bill date was December 13th, 2024.
A meme showing Garak from Star Trek: Deep Space 9 saying "I'm a terrorist" and the profile picture of @Starfleet-Command saying "I can thirst over it"
A two panel meme about Star Trek: Deep Space 9. The first panel shows Kira Nerys talking to Benjamin Sisko. She says "I'm a terrorist" to which Sisko beams and replies "Awww, you're sweet!" The second panel shows Michael Eddington saying "I'm a terrorist" to which Sisko looks stern and says "Commander Worf, prepare to launch torpedoes."
An image of Garak, an alien man with grey skin, weird tendrils going down the side of his face and spoon in the middle of his forehead, is holding a shot. Text underneath him says "I won't say I hate you but my admiration for you is under control."
Benjamin Sisko, a man wearing a Starfleet uniform that is open and dissheveled, talks to a camera. He says "So... I lied. I cheated. I bribed men to cover up the crimes of other men. I am an accessory to murder.... Computer. Erase that entire personal log." The computer responds "Unable to comply. Station wide broadcasts cannot be deleted", leaving Sisko to point and yell at the camera.
A man in a Starfleet uniform, looking sickly with veins on his head. The subtitles show he's shouting the word Pepperoni
A post of someone named Nael Fox (@sfxprb.bsky.social) posting something 9 days ago. It says This is why I had to walk away from Picard after like 2 episodes. It was so goddamn dismal. If I wanted that I would watch something that's NOT Star Trek. Star Trek is hope. Star Trek is about the best that humanity can be. Star Trek should never be about jack booted thugs."
Seven of Nine, smiling and eating cake with rainbows all around her, and text saying "Could you Seven of Not?"
Garak from DS9 saying "Well, if you've got your mind made up, I won't confuse you with facts." while toasting.
A meme showing a man turning away from his girlfriend to look at someone else. The man is labeled "Me", the girlfriend is labeled "Gatekeepers" and what he's lookingat is a slate of characters from the newer Star Trek shows. Those characters are Michael Burnham, Christopher Pike, Beckett Mariner and Jean-Luc Picard in his Picard Season 1 Uniform.
A man in a tuxedo with white tie stands on an opera stage singing powerfully. What he's singing is: Gatekeeper, Gatekeeper Hates the new fans Says they aren't real Wants them all banned. Gatekeeper, Gatekeeper Stay off the web Let fandom thrive in the land.
Cadet Tilly in Season 1 of Star Trek: Discovery. A white woman with pale skin and red hair wound up in a tight bun, shes got a giant grin on her face and is giggling while saying "You guys, this is so fucking cool."
USS Discovery striking its best ‘I’m faster than your ship and I know it’ pose against the backdrop of deep space. The sleek curves and beautifully lit silhoutte scream ‘elegance,’ while the star-studded nebula gives it the perfect filter. Just waiting for the perfect moment to jump out of frame and leave you in awe.
Doug Jones in the makeup of Saru sitting in the captains chair, looking at the camera and smiling. Jonathan Frakes is embracing him and looking happy.
Captain Christopher Pike looks upward in a confident pose. Red and blue lighting comes from all around him
Captain Johnathan Archer with glowing red eyes and fire burning around him. The text below says "Faith of the heart intensifies"
Two shots of Spock from Star Trek. In the first he's holding a glass and saying "There are two types of people in the world." In the second he's drinking from the glass saying "Avoid them both."
A shot from Star Trek: Deep Space 9 of Gul Dukat saying "ATTENTION BAJORAN WORKERS" but Dukat's face has been replaced with Elon Musk's.
Two panels, both from the Good Place. The first is of an older women (I don't remember her name but she a hoe), two women in their 30s (Janet and Eleanor), and an older man (Michael). Eleanor says "Janet, can I have a baby elephant made of pure light that tells you truths about the universe?" The second panel is of that elephant made of pure light. It says "Old Trek was just as woke as New Trek, you're just getting old"
An image detailing that "your valiant battle efforts have paid off! Your reward is here: Logitech G Gift card" with the code O266-AFMV-XEMP-B6NY It says to click the code to go to the above website (which just redirects to logitechg.com) and enter the code.
A white man with silver hair and white armor. Lord Valkorian from Star Wars
Shatner says "Captain kirk is climbing the mountain. Why is he climbing the mountain? He wants to make love to the mountain. The climb is going where no man has gone before." Dr. McCoy then reacts with "What the hell did I just watch?"
A man, Reginald Barclay, in a Starfleet Uniform mid-transport. He looks mildly horrified.
A mug of what appears to be hot chocolate. In it are two bubbles and a space in the foam that make it appear to be a face screaming. Text is laid overtop saying "QUARK!"
A man wearing a blue uniform and holding a ladle. The man is Neelix from Star Trek Voyager. He has sparse red hair, mottled sections of brownish-greenish skin, a wide nose and daggerlike teeth.
A Star Trek gif. Picard slowly realizes that a Tamarian speaks in GIF form then asks "Why the hell didn't you make a GIF that says that?" The Tamarian disappears into a hedge like Homer from the Simpsons.
A security guard in a barren room playing a saxophone while a ghostly image of the same mans face is overlaid on top. The man is Chang from the TV show Community.
A Star Trek space ship, the USS Pasteur. It is a medical frigate with a giant spherical saucer section.
Stacy Abrams as the President of United Earth in Star Trek: Discovery Season 4. She's wearing a cape and looking fly. Stars and a planet are in the background. She is also flanked by two security officers from Earth.
A picture of Gul Dukat with a reaction saying "What if it was human?" Then a picture of Captain Lorca and a cheering reaction.
Two Eaglemoss Star Trek ship models. One of a Nimrod-class ship and one XL version of the Crossfield-class ship. There is also a Star Trek: Discovery era badge.
A shot of a lego borg cube with very young Borg drones saying "We are the preschool borg. You will be assimilated, followed by snacks and an afternoon nap"
A notification that a label has been placed on a post of Starfleet Press Office labeling it "Shiny"
Kirk asking McCoy "How many fingers do I have up?" in a Vulcan Salute. Bones responds "That's not very damned funny." "Well your sense of humor has come back" says kirk. "The hell it has. What's that?" Bones queries, noticing a hypospray that Kirk has pulled out. "Lexadrine." "Lexadrine? What for?" "You're suffering from a Vulcan Mind Meld Doctor." "That Green blooded son of a bitch.... it's his revenge for all those arguments he lost."
A photoshop of Tuvoks head on B'ellanas body, characters from Star Trek Voyager
A bluesky notification saying "Q now followed you."
A meme depicting a conversation between Shran and Garak. Shran: We agreed we'd meet unarmed Garak. Are you unarmed?" Garak: "Yes. Are you unarmed?" Shran: "No... I lied." He said, pulling out a gun. Garak: "So did I" he said, also pulling out a gun. Shran: "But I lied twice." He said, pulling out a second gun. Garak: Oh you're good.
A fake box of cereal called Frosted Frakes. Riker is in place of Tony the Tiger and the tagline is now They're Numberrrrrrr One! Also inside is a free Ford Hotwheels 2005 Enterprise
A hippie version of Riker, wearing a scarf and vaping while having a hand tattoo with the captain "Star Trek: The Next Gentrification"
An illustrated image with the headline "THe joys of Holodeck One" of Captain Janeway and SEven of Nine in clothing from the show Xena: Warrior Princess. Seven asks "So captain, these humans, Xena and Gabrielle, they were colleagues?" Janeway coughs and says "Well, sort of."
A tumblr post. The first portion says "Star trek actors are so strong for doing technobabble with a straight face. If you asked me to talk about the technicron particles are mainlining the quantum blorbonator I would fall apart immediately." Then follows a section of the book The 50 year Mission: The Next 25 years. The section is by Andre Bormanis, the science consultant on DS9. "An important lesson on technobabble came to me courtesy of Terry Farrell. I was at my first Deep Space 9 wrap party at the end of the second season, and it's the first time I've ever been to a wrap party so it was like a pretty big deal to me. I'm walking around and talking to the people I know. And I see Terry Farrell standing off by herself. I'd never actually met her so I sheepishly go up and introduce myself to her. I said "Ms Farrell, I'm Andre Bormanis." "Oh nice to meet you. What do you do on the show?" I'm like "I'm the science consultant. I'm the guy who puts all that technobabble into your dialogue." And she literally grabbed me by the lapels and lifted me off my feet. She's six feet tall. She's a very tall, striking woman. She's like "You fucking asshole!" and she starts shaking me and I'm like "I'm sorry! It's my job!"
Pyramid Head looking extremely sexy in a shirtless murderer way
A screenshot of Q from The Next Generation holding a wine goblet saying "Don't be part of the problem. Be the entire problem."
Mr. Rogers with Gowrons head saying "Glory to you and your neighborhood"