Elmore

@swodude.bsky.social

210 Followers 352 Following

Just a dude that drove ships.

A Hyundai Santa Cruz with the words “creamy ranch” stuck on the back window. 100% visible to anyone. Not only is anyone behind this vehicle going to see this, due to the nature of how mirrors work anyone driving this is going to see the words “creamy ranch” in their rear-view mirror.
A crude drawing of Bart Simpson with the phrase “eat pant” I found in Budapest. I can only imagine it’s a reverse translation of whatever they translated “eat my shorts” into Hungarian for localization of The Simpsons.
A silver Nissan with damage to the front left of the car after being hit by a bicycle head on after turning in front of it.
The title card from Doctor who that says "Colon looks good. See you in ten years." This was prompted by me waking up for the last 30 seconds of my recent colonoscopy and I can never see this version of the Doctor Who opening any other way now.
The title screen of a fake episode of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine with the fake title “the station is a bird and here’s the cloaca.
I little book titled “A Tiny Fart Diary”
A keyboard for iOS by swiftkey. They were purchssed by Microsoft ages ago, but now there's a popup every god damn time asking me to log into my Microsoft account every time I use my iphone's keyboard
Veterans plaza, silver spring, MD. About 100 people gathered at the pit stop for bike to work day.
A ginger cat laying on a chair with both front paws curled over his eyes.
A ginger cat sleeps peacefully on the laundry fresh out of the dryer.
A ginger cat that is curled up into a nearly perfect shrimp position (back legs perfectly straight so it resembles a cocktail shrimp)
A frame from the Hunt for Red October where dude asks "Andrei, Have you lost another sub?" only the meme text says, "Tiger, are you telling me you rolled another vehicle?"
A quote "bike lane" unquote which is just green lines painted in a narrow gutter.
Dune poster that says "Dune Dune. In the criminal justice system, sexually based offenses are considered especially heinous. In New York City, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Victims Unit. These are their stories." Is a play on the sound they use in law and order
The DUNE poster with the text replaced with "Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!". People under 40 may not understand this. Possibly 35. I do not know how long life alert ran these ads.
The DUNE poster art with the words replaced with "Shun. These knives!". It's a somewhat deep cut achewood reference.
The inside of a airplane bathroom door with an ashtray installed.
Two cats on a couch. One is alert and keenly interested in the person talking the picture and the other couldn't give a shit
A dog named pepper, wearing a sweater, sitting on a comfy chair wondering why the holiday party is across the room.
A wire coat hanger. This is on response to someone asking "Can you think of examples where people use technologies differently from what the developers intended, whether unintentionally or as an act of resistance?"
Ray stepped on a piece of gum and takes pictures to send to Roast Beef, including a hand-written sign that says "just like old times." Screenshot from and achewood comic from August 4th, 2005. The comic is literally about Ray stepping on dog shit and being nostalgic about it. I imagine Chris Onstad stepped on dog shit sometime right before he wrote the comic.
weather forecast for over a foot of snow followed by 4 days of sub-freezing temperature
A young kitten with large ears looking over the couch in front of the fireplace
Four hotdogs are sliced into 1/4 inch pieces and seared on a ripping hot cast iron pan. The maillard effect intensifies and deepens the flavor of the hotdogs, that, when added to the beans, gives the dish the ooomph needed to earn that second michelin star.
A ginger cat really really wants to be on my shoulder while I do work at my desk
A google search window for "famous people named butler" and the response is "The most famous person with the last name butler is W. B. Yeats."
Elon musk waxes poetic about hard men with regard to lord of the rings.
Jumbojeepman In the maritime world they call that the law of gross tonnage. That means no matter what the maritime regulations, small boats stay out of the way of big boats because no matter who is at fault, the small boat is going to come out worse in an accident. Instead, we have filled pedestrians with false bravado about how they have 'rights' to just hop in front of a moving car and somehow it's going to be the driver's problem to deal with.
A picture of a ginger cat laying underneath the sheets on my bed.
Album cover for In on the Kill Taker by Fugazi.
A photo taken of a waffle house during the 2024 solar eclipse, with the eclipsed sun above the restaurant, partially obscured by clouds. It's very dramatic.
Bonnie Tyler from her music video Holding Out for a Hero, wielding a 12" footling cold-cut combo aka hero.
The teenage mutant ninja turltles logo with the words replaced with "the adventures of elliot"
Roast Beef from Achewood not knowing how to get lady's
Another picture of my cat, but also included is my Garrus anime body pillow.
CAT on my COUCH
The New York Times Reader Choice ballot for top movies of the 21st century, with all fast and furious movies represented (except the Hobbes and Shaw spin-off and the web releases)
A sticker on the back of a Tesla Model Y that says "my other machine kills fascists."
"Goodbye Winter, Hello Spring" in the style of the teenage mutant ninja turtles
meme where someone says "rich states vote democrat" and someone replies "but rich people vote republican" and the first person gets angry and their eyebrows make the shape of the graph this meme is a reply to.
Roast Beef yells, "Who wants my niceness, who wants my niceness, who permanently wants my niceness" while holding a sign that says "I don't know how to do this" from a comic by Chris Onstad.
Don Omar and Tego Calderon in Fast Five right before they blow up the toilets in a police station in Brazil.
Apple music home screen claiming that Kendrick Lamar's recent album, GNX, is popular among fans of Viagra Boys, a punk band from Sweden.
Screenshot of the original Pokemon game combat scene, but Santa is telling ralphie "you'll shoot your eye out, kid"