Truexyz

@truex.bsky.social

218 Followers 380 Following

the Internet is dead. long live the Internet. {truex.org and truex or truexyz or dutrieux}

freshly baked pb chip chocolate brownies, still in an oven with a blue interior. the photo is artfully askew. perverts may also enjoy my upper-left arm.
that guy from the simpsons who says “i don’t recall wishing you good luck” after firing kirk from the cracker factory
a marketing image which says “TOUCH-CLEAN SPRAY HOLES”. the first two words are a legally registered trademark.
a white miniature schnauzer is sleeping, splayed along the edge of a round dog bed. the bed is sized for a dog approximately 4-500% larger. it is covered with a fitted sheet that has geese on it.
a screenshot of the miniature engineering craftsmanship museum's home page at craftsmanshipmuseum.com. underneath their logo is a banner image with a picture of a tiny lathe being operated by a normal-sized human. the image is overlaid with text that reads "How do you make micro chips? With a miniature lathe of course!"
a cartoon of s guy wearing a tie. his arms are crossed and his face is scrunched up in a mixture of concern and turmoil. he is grieving. his eyebrows, flat. it looks as if he’s about to say something, i guess.
a store sign which reads “afeela: sony honda mobility”, a joint partnership that makers no sense and was also recently cancelled. why did they have retail space. who signed that check
the previous post being displayed in the discover tab
an almost comically large bottle of maggi seasoning.
eggs cooking in a pan. they’ve been beaten with maggi and green onions and garlic. the eggs are in the shape of a pancake with swirled tectonic ridges.
the lower-left corner of a windows desktop. the wallpaper is set to Bliss. there's a little png file of a tiberium growth sitting on the hill.
a screenshot of the microsoft outlook grammar checker suggesting that i should remove a load-bearing noun from a sentence.
the windows context menu for a powerpoint file. of the top four options, two are to "ask copilot" which makes absolutely no sense in this context
A fake Magic: The Gathering card. It's titled "Psychic Dominator" and has concept artwork of the psychic dominator from Red Alert 2: Yuri's Revenge. The card costs 1X, 2 black, and 2 red to play. Spend another 2 red, 2 black, and tap the card to gain permanent control of a target creature and all creatures X/2 inches away from the target creature. I do not play MtG and have no idea if any of this makes sense.
screenshot of an exchange from twitter. in a thread about how most of the world refers to chicken sandwiches as burgers, i wrote "we define burger by the preparation of the meat and not the bread/bun. a chicken burger would have a ground and cooked patter, to us this is a sandwich" in response, a fellow named tom asks "Why the fuck does Barack Obama follow you"
a gallon jar of heavy duty mayonnaise. it is actually specified as 'heavy duty' on the label, that's not me editorializing. industrial mayonnaise. no high fructose corn syrup in it, though. that stuff isn't suitable as an industrial food lubricant
kane, charismatic leader of the brother of nod from the video jame "command and conquer", standing behind the 'sickos' window saying 'yes... ha ha ha... YES!' as is traditional in our culture. i'm getting far more utility out of this image than i expected
a banner that reads “home of the world famous fresno nightcrawler”. it’s hanging over a storefront window display of space aliens celebrating christmas and also mickey mouse.
kraven the hunter, 60s-style, is in the foreground. a screenshot is positioned so that he's saying "There are still a couple vials of Air Bud cum left, stored in a freezer at the International Canine Semen Bank..." peter parker is behind him looking on with not inconsiderable alarm. his face is doing that thing where half of it is his mask while his spider-sense goes off
an image based off of the kelly cartoon (from the onion) where the sicko is peering through the window saying "yes... ha ha ha... YES", only it's kane (the leader of the brotherhood of nod). he is from a video game. a thing that he says a lot is "peace through power", linking this post to the heretofore quoted.
professor xavier is removing the cerebro helmet as he asks "do you think i've completely given up on my dream of mutants and humans coexisting peacefully?" it's revealed that he's wearing makeup in the style of trixie mattel underneath the helmet, with bold shapes and wildly over-defined cheekbones. he continues; "do you think i don't love you? because i do. i do... and i want you to always remember that."
two comic panels. the first is a close-up on the scarlet witch's face as she says 'no more protocols'. the second panel shows several social network and comms protocols being consumed by white light.
An advertisement for the polytron. It reads: Only the polytron reduces an entire mouse to a soup-like homogenate in 30 seconds. image what it can do for your samples. powerful 700w motor develops 27,000 RPM. unique tissue disruption by mechanical shearing and cavitation. interchangeable generators to suit your sample. foam-reducing generators minimize sample aeration. optional speed controller, reco 31t, maintains constant speeds regardless of changes in solution viscosity.
a picture of a french farmer in a red jacket. they’re wearing a jaunty cap and holding up some fine looking onions. maybe shallots. the photo is from alamy (a stock photo company) and the watermark mashed it look like a swarm of the letter A is attacking the man.
a white miniature schnauzer is lying upon an enormous dog bed. she is gazing forlornly into the middle distance as she is suffering the indignity of a haircut. an arm with an electric trimmer has entered from stage right and is doing some work on her belly.
a package of dr. guild's green mountai (reg. u.s. pat. off.) asthmatic cigarettes to relieve attacks and paroxysms of asthma. (active ingredients: stramonium and belladonna , containing total alkaloids per cigarette of 0.05 to 0.07 gr. and potassium nitrate, anise and anethol. only eleven cents!
a photo of a chicken nugget being dipped into a disposable sauce cup, only the sauce cup is mounted to a car vent like a mobile phone. text reads "as seen on shark tank!" and "no more sauce-less nuggets or dry fries!" which is an absolutely unhinged concern for somebody operating a multi-ton motor vehicle
a hero shot of the USS Pasteur, an example of the olympic class of starfleet ships. the saucer is isntead an orb and the fuselage looks like a streamlined carrier deck with a flat top and an extended keel.
a screenshot from a corporate-style animated video. a narrator is describing online threats. behind her are panels showing phishing (an email on a hook surrounded by fish), a fake website (generic website and masked thief), and hackers (a gang of raccoons typing on a laptop)
an image from a short video about digital security. the narrator is in the foreground pointing at a safe. the background is a shallow red sea by a white shore. enormous keys are embedded in the sea. everything looks apocalyptic. it's night. stars are out. the narrator is smiling.
a screenshot of the 'trending' slug in the sidebar. it shows 'fbi files' and 'superman' side-by-side, implying that the federal bureau of investigations has finally released everything they know about the "super man" who is enacting vigilante justice
a scan of the box art for a plastic model kit that includes three sci-fi figures. in the art they are in a space diner. there's a military man smiling as he watches as a short terrible robot (slight hunched) slaps and also electrozaps a futuristic waitress' behind. printed on the box is the phrase "at the edge of the universe. strange company's adventures. Episode I, the first meeting. wow, i like it!" also printed is the ominous promise and/or threat that "a full description of the story is inside the box."
a picture of some schmuck who does a true crime murder rubbernecking podcast. his mouth is wide open and he's pointing with both hands at his t-shirt which has a design on it that reads "camping: you either find the skull or become the skull". is he proud of himself? is he... aware? or are we in a p-zombie situation
a close up of the cover of Black Goliath #1. a henchman, or perhaps goon, is on his back behind an enormous foot. one arm is stretched out, the other half covering a face that is both terrified and extremely sleepy
a snow leopard that's holding the tip of its tail horizontally in its mouth. it's relaxed. huge fuckin' paws though, the kind that can take your head off
a calico shorthair cat sitting on top of a pile of perlite bags
part of a menu with several court-themed sandwich names. the best is a turkey sandwich named “the right to remain cilantro”
the label on the back of an old pc case. it specifies that the computer is a PC/XT clone from DTK called the DATA-1000. there is also a convenience receptacle.
a screenshot from ms copilot. it is instructed to disable all emoji use. it responds with "got it! i'll keep things strictly text-based for you. if you ever want me to sprinkle some emojis back in, just let me know." then it puts in a thumbs-up emoji, says "oops-just kidding!" and then includes a laughing emoji, which all reads to me as wildly rude to do in a work-focused application
a screenshot from DOOM (2016). Olivia Pierce has just initiated a process to blast a hole through realities to Hell. you, the player, are unable to stop her. just before she leaves she says "you could not have saved them anyway" with cold calm and just a hint of weariness.
the twitter bot called grok has been prompted to explain a post by the pope about ending all war in pirate terms. grok then launched into wildly inappropriate silly pirate talk about the “kill the boer” song
Picture of a cool leaf. It’s a deep red with like, purple specs on it There is also some sort of Cryptid on a leash in the background
a refrigerator magnet done in the style of an old “choose your own adventure” book. the title is “as purr my last email”, the series is “passive aggressive adventures” and the illustration is of a cat wearing glasses typing at a pre-lcd computer that is on fire. (the monitor, not the cat.) there are cat scratch marks on the side of the crt monitor. remember pressing the degauss button? haha pixels go brrrrr
a small fluffy dog who needs a haircut, lying in a fuzzy bed with her head resting in a fuzzy cushion, looking directly at the camera
two miniature schnauzers, an old man and a young lady, lying upon some very oversized dog beds. like, think of a large dog bed. bigger than that. the smaller dog is on a bed with a bolster, her chin resting on the edge and peering up and out.
two pictures. the first is of a coyote and a badger trotting away from the camera, side-by-side. it's day, and both are in an open field. in the second picture they're both sitting down. the coyote is looking towards the camera. the badger is looking over its shoulder in another direction.
a painting of two deer in a forest, walking mostly parallel to but slightly away from the viewer on the other side of a stream. it’s signed ‘paterman’ and came from a thrift store or estate sale or something
a pigeon feather and a bunch of leaves caught up in some webbing in a corner by the garage
a screenshot from the video game "maniac mansion" showing a man standing in front of a microwave. the game interface is based on simple sentences where you use a verb on a noun. the screenshot reads "use hamster in microwave oven". you can probably figure out the rest.
a screenshot from the schwab trading platform. it shows an open buy for "LTNM Spyder Latinum ETF" and a filled buy order for "NGUS FCA Sovereign Profit Fund".
A short video clip from the video game "Red Alert 3." Randy Couture is portraying an Allied commander who says: "Well, this is unbelievable. I knew he was always a little wound up but I didn't see this coming. Well, let's get moving. We gotta stop our crazy president."
a bottle of mineral oil from the 70s probably, with labeling indicating use as s laxative. here’s the copy as provided by smartphone text recognition: SQUIBB Mineral Oil A gentle, effective intestinal lubricant, especially refined to render it odorless, tasteless, water white and crystal clear. Squibb Mineral Oil has a high specific gravity and a high natural viscosity which cause it to flow slowly at body temperatures, reducing to a minimum the possibility of leakage. Squibb Mineral Oil acts only as a lubricant; it is non irritating and is not absorsed. Dose: One to two tablespoonfuls. Caution: To be taken only at bedtime. Do not take during pregnancy or administer to infants, except upon the advice of a physician. Squibb Mineral Oll is available in the economical Pint and Quart sizes. Koop tightly closed, protect from sunlight
A white mini schnauzer, half on and half on an oversized dog bed, her butt and hind legs up on top while her front end is splayed across the tile
a powerpoint slide. two rectangles form ground and sky. there is a cartoon duck holding a sign in its beak reading 'DRAFT'
a screenshot of a tweet. it's from Colin Dellow. there's a picture of a bicycle with a propane tank strapped to it. the text reads "People always say cyclists need to be more afraid of cars, because in a collision, the car wins. It doesn't have to be like that We can _both_ lose."
okay, so, there this one political cartoon by latuff from 2005. it's a drawing of an american soldier shouting 'dying for bush's oil profits' while being shot through from off-panel. in this post the gunshot is replaced with the tesla logo stabbing through the soldier's torso as he shouts 'dying for elon's tesla profits! maybe you had to be there
a two-frame animation of adonis the cat yawning. it's looped so he's yawning over and over again.
a small white miniature schnauzer is sleeping in a shoulder-sling with her head resting on my arm.
a stock image of a cat on somebody's lap. the person is using a laptop. the image is clearly screencapped from another window with bits of UI at the edges. overlaid on the image is the phrase "oh my god, what am i even doing here, i am only a cat"
an internet post by SardonicTyrant which reads as follows: "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Marxism," i holler as i overturn the government and turn the Gulf of Mexico into the Gulf of Shit