Bishmonger

@walan.bsky.social

133 Followers 148 Following

2004 Punxsutawney Area High School Groundhog King currently reigning over Pittsburgh. Father, husband, bi, maybe neurodivergent, definitely exhausted.

It says nirvanna the band the show the movie and yes I will continue to do this joke every time this dude makes a new font generator
'Hey there, I'm a guy looking for Diners, Driners, Drivings, Dry Diners and Dods!"
A box of 'Blue Eyed Fox' brand cherries with a sexy cartoon fox wearing a red hood and a basket even though that fairy tale had a wolf in it so the reference is all wrong
Skwisgaar Skwigelf taller than a tree Toki Wartooth, not a bumblebee William Murderface, Murderface, Murderface Pickles the drummer doodily doo, ding-dong doodily, doodily doo Nathan Explosion
Screenshot from a game called 'Hungry Cat Nonogram'. The image, when completed, says "Remember that gecko from the ninties?" And yes, it's fucking Gex, that shades wearing bastard
A photo of me, the poster, from an oddities expo. I'm wearing a black suit jacket with a death metal t-shirt and dress pants with a metallic watch, jelly wristbands with Protomen lyrics, and a mark around my bald head from the hat I was wearing that kinda looks like a lobotomy scar. I'm turned with a three-quarter view to the camera with a raised eyebrow. Oh yeah, I'm also cradling and stroking a taxidermed raccoon like a cat. And I have an evil goatee. Pretty much the vibe I was going for when this was taken.
A chicken stands on a beach. Text reads "if you are seeing this the curse is lifted have a good day"
A vintage ECW t-shirt from an eBay listing that reads TAZ 6:32
Two fingers holding half of a screw that had been sheered off and stuck in my back tire.
Screen cap of a 1997 episode of SNL with Chris Farley as El Nino, a flamboyant wrestler. He's shirtless with a frilly vest, red tights, and a belt that reads El Nino. "For those of you who don't habla Español, El Nino is Spanish for... The Nino!"
Dune poster font generator image saying "Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie"
You go to hell before you die! Please.
A green hat from The Onion with white text saying 'I Appreciate The Muppets On A Much Deeper Lever Than You'
The cover to 'Redeemer (Underground Edition)' by Machinae Supremacy (which actually came out two days after my twentieth birthday, but who's counting?)
Sir Pentious saying "Do a sex with me"
BUGS BUNNY Most Pronoun Switching
My hand holding an unopened single use package of water based personal lubricant that I picked up from the snowy street because I'm a fucking freak
A black World of Warcraft t-shirt. The emblem of the Horde faction is stylized in red with text that exclaims "FOR THE HORDE". The Alliance can suck it.
A tan case for the Ray-Ban Meta glasses sits in the snow on a sidewalk somewhere.
A hand holding a small, yellow box cutter shaped like a cartoon whale with a big eye and a smile
A dog toy of a squeak bone covered in Grinch fur
The sign leading to the Pittsburgh Mills mall, however most of the lights are burnt out so it now reads 'ugh Mills'
A copy of Nintendo Power Issue 13, aka the Super Mario Bros. 3 Strategy Guide.
CAH discount codes (with some of the info edited out). DYING RISKY CRACK JOLLY DEATH PANGS GODLY BACON STEAK RISKY PANTS SUSHI BEEFY TATER ELBOW CHEAP DEMON SPANK DIRTY CHUNK WOMAN SPICY PENIS SLAPS PISSY INSTA WOMAN NASTY BOOTY NIPPS HAIRY CRIME CRACK TOXIC DEATH PUSSY CHEAP PUSSY WANGS PRIME STANK BOOTY
The car ahead of me at the Sheetz let the pump unattended holy shit that's dangerous
"Mike Matei's Creamy White Sauce" (Habanero Garlic Ranch) (Pre-Order) $14.99 USD
Bat Robbert (Vampire Survivors)
Screenshot from my YouTube subscription. Six in a row are from tech channels all dropping their reviews of the Analogue 3D almost in unison.
some workout product called 'woke af miami' that features a 12-point buck in blue and pink colors
From left to right: Copper, Grizzle, Pumpkin, Little Lady
pelonis
PEPSI for TV-GAME from Pepsiman (PS1) in the Zohran campaign generator
A huge mural of Batman made out of bread.
My Halloween costume this year: Space Ghost. (This is the first and last time I'm wearing a damn morphsuit...)
A screenshot from Rock Band 3 Deluxe where I scored a 58.73% on Dragonforce's 'Through The Fire And Flames' on Expert Guitar. Two stars out of five, 78,963 points. Also I've been drinking but I really don't think I'd have done any better sober
BooBooKitty floats slowly towards Space Ghost's interplanetary monument to the safety pin.
A Sonic themed Hawaiian shirt that features a pattern based on the Sonic 1 special stage which I would get but 1) it has a sprite of Sonic outside of ball form which doesn't happen in the special stage and 2) it's clearly the Sonic 3 sprite, not the Sonic 1 sprite and- oh jesus christ facebook is right about me
The Smash Bros Rex character select screen featuring honestly way too many names for me to put in this alt text space
Post from 'The Peppermint Dipshit': fetlife is NOT a site for people whose lives revolve around fettuccine
A thumbnail from a capella singer Smooth McGroove's latest video, uploaded in September 2025.
A bald, middle-aged white guy's post workout selfie but really Alan now's not the time for this read the goddamn room
Shoe Eraser sitting on a shelf, but angled so it says Hoe Eraser. I'm not very funny please bear with me
That food truck with the really good eggrolls is back
The box art for Jaleco's Bases Loaded 3 for the NES, featuring Ryne Sandberg.
And the prom's TOMORROW!
A man in an orange shirt with a ponytail stands in line at a fish market. He has a tan and blue tote bag with the OnlyFans logo stitched on it. This post is going to draw so many fucking bots to me I just know it
A digital drawing of a bald blue man with glasses, a red shirt, and jeans with a girl with purple / indigo hair, a black shirt, and leggings laying face down on the ground. A smaller inlay screenshot of Kris and Ralsei from Deltarune in the same post is in the corner as well as a drawn heart and the message 'lol'
A Screencap from Futurama. Dr. Zoidberg, in the middle of surgery, states, "So, this is how it starts. First with the jokes, then comes the heavy stuff."
Susie and Kris are standing on some rubble with some French JRPG people. Susie says in a Deltarune text box *KRIS WHERE ZEE FUCK ARE WE OH HOH HOH
A t-shirt in Pittsburgh's Strip District. It's a parody of The Beatles' Abbey Road cover featuring the racing pierogies that run during the inning breaks of Pirates games. In 1966, Sauerkraut Saul died in a car accident and the other members, Oliver Onion, Cheese Chester, and Jalapeño Hannah, replace him with a look-alike, hiding clues to Saul's death in their body of work.
A calico named Riskers, in a rare event, is laying down on my stomach. She's also making biscuits on my bare chest. Ow.
Picture of the poster in a pinstriped suit with a green tie and matching pocket square. In the background, an orange and white 16-year-old cat named Grizzle sits at the top of a staircase.
Two action figures on a desk. Axel Stone from Streets of Rage 2 about to Grand Upper the everliving FUCK outta Jim Carrey Dr. Robotnik